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November 8, 2005, 11:16 am PST
been there done that and did it again
Quote From: vanessa24I LOVE Dr. Phil so much & watch him every day & these days I feel like I could be on the show.. my life is that screwed up.... My husband & I are married for 3 yrs & we have a beautiful 2 yr old daughter. We have been together for 7 yrs altogether. He went away to work this past June & just a month ago he called me & told me that there is nothing between us anymore, he don't miss me & don't love me. He said that he missed me at first when he left but after a while he stopped missing me completely. We are separated, to be divorced & when he comes home for Xmas he is packing all his stuff up & going back to the place where he is working for permantatly. My first reaction to this is that he is seeing someone else but he says he is not (I'll never know)
A couple of weeks prior to this happening he called me & told me that he ran into an old old ex of his at the mall... and he kept saying that when he told her he was married to me she couldn't believe it. I checked his email (he used to let me do it) & he had an email from her with pictures that same night & it was innocent enough I guess. I never told him that I seen that email & he would not have known that I even checked it (he checked it first) & a couple of days later he told me not to check his email & changed his password... He also took out all of our money out of our joint account & closed out the account! Then he tried to change his story about his ex saying that he didn't run into her but he ran into her brother & her brother called her on the phone so they could chat . For 2 mths prior to these he was telling me that he didn't want to be married & said "why do u think that I was late for our wedding?" And "joking" that he was going to call a lawyer & get divorce papers sent out to me.. which he didn't - Yet!
When he first told me that he didn't love me & blah blah blah he said that when he comes home for Xmas maybe we can see if we can work it out... now it's a different story - he's coming home & packing up his stuff......
I am a stay-at-home mom (hopefully not for long!) & he totally cut me off & has only sent me $300 here & $400 there over the past 2 mths. I am home here paying all the bills for us.. He don't want to pay me anything but says that from now on his is sending home money for our daughter only. I am going to get the job I always wanted & hopefully going back to school in Sept to get a real career. I am totally hurt & clueless about what happened with him. He is a totally different person the past 2 mths.. To me it seems like he is seeing someone else. I didn't do anything wrong - I am hardely anywhere with my daughter. I practically raised her myself so I guess not having him around wouldn't be much different. He was never home to begin with!
Anyways.. that's enough bitching out of me! Anyone have any advice????????????????
Thanks
Confused & Hurt Honey it's plain to see from the outside he is cheating on you. the reason could be any; not enough spark, hates himself , bored, your "different", his family history,(maybe his parents did this),or he could just be a creep. But he is just shuting down too fast. To me it seams he has found or has a definite possibility of another realationship. In my past i have dealt with this several times. I could talk to you about it e-mail me @ romanangel77@yahoo.com. we can talk.But bottom line if he's not ready to stop the crash the train WILL derail no matter what you do. He needs to be apart of fixing it.
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