Replies to '08/18 Dr. Phil's Road Show: Newlywed Challenge, Part 2'

it's true, that no matter what problems other people have, it can seem trivial compared to someone else's (there's always somebody dying, lost, etc.).  as a military wife myself,  i respect what a huge sacrifice you (and other families) are making.  it is a huge sacrifice, especially for the children, and also for the spouses.  i also think if these people knew HOW to cherish what they have, they would.  just like you seem to when your husband is home.  i am happy for you that you have a good relationship right now and are able to do that (or at least, look forward to it).  the people on the show have a different experience than you.  we all come from different pasts and bring different strengths and wounds into a relationship.  if it were so easy to just appreciate what we do have, then we wouldn't have such a high divorce rate in this country.  marriage can be wonderful if you are married to the right person (and still hard work), but it can be extremely hard work to get to a better place if you find out into the marriage (usually after children) that you wouldn't make that same decision in a partner.  it is workable, but it can feel like a sacrifice and very painful.  just as others can't possibly comprehend the sacrifices you make, unless they go thru the exact same thing you have....it's hard to fathom other people's situations and trials unless you have been thru the exact same thing yourself.  it's hard to imagine someone who is trapped in negativity?  people should just be happy because life is too short?  if happiness were the only human emotion, it would be hard to get through a lot of life's situations.  even optomistic, healthy people experience pain, loss, negative thoughts, anger, etc.  The difference is a healthy person knows how to cope and to have healthy thoughts as well (easier for some than others).  do you have the exact same childhood, adult, and marriage experiences?   i admire anyone who goes to Dr. Phil, or another counselor, to try to find some level of healthiness and happiness out of life that they can't seem to get a grasp on.  I am glad Dr. Phil offers continued counseling to people and families in crisis.  Sometimes healing can be a long journey.  if there is insight and reaching out, there is hope for love and happiness.  that is why i enjoy the dr. phil show....it is hope based. 

I am sorry to hear that about you and your husband. I was a Navy wife during the Viet Nam war so I can appreciate very much what you are saying here. I am wishing you both good luck and that your husband gets home safe and sound very soon! 

  

I am 56 years old and have never changed a tire. And I have no desire to learn or to experience this situation first hand. That is what AAA and cell phones are for.