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September 14, 2007, 4:25 pm PDT
How do you address your own children living with you
Quote From: nightangel1282Hmmm... the first half sounds like it's gonna be another case of MIL vs. DIL... Can't really form any opinions until I see the show and get the full story behind that one...
But the second one... Hon, I'm so sorry that you had to marry a woman who is so cold and cruel as to marry you and then start sleeping around because she's gotten tired of the relationship. She should have talked to you instead and tried to fix the problems. It's disgusting how cruel some people can be in a relationship... If she doesn't agree to marriage counciling and trying to keep your marriage together, then I say get out and find a woman who's willing to show you the love that you've been denied!! (This is just my initial reaction from reading the description of the show, and I'll see if my opinion changes once I watch it on Friday.)
Nightangel1282 We have a similiar situation in that the Mother constantly uses her children in manipulative ways in order to get her own way. For example, she would take work schedules that are in direct conflict with caring for her children--knowing full well that we, her family, is left to pick up the stack for her absenteeism. Yes, we know the simply answer may be to not make ourselves available as to be manipulated, but that position leaves the children without consistent care. The consistency being us, the grandparents. The Father is in and out of jail, our daughter is recklessly immature and unresponsive to discipline. She has made some seriously poor decisions that has led to her unability to have a place of her own. Additionally, she had constantly told lies and other "pity-party" stories to gain favor with outside people and non-family members in order to continue her strangle hold on us i.e., if we don't take care of the children who will? We have been lambasted and criticized by people that we thought were our friends. But what was happened is we have lost quite a few of what we thought were our friends due to her manipulations. She is unable to have and maintain a decent relationship with anyone and is pointly jealous of the relationships we have had with others over the years. She is a slacker that makes false promises, unkempt, foul-mouthed with a bad attitude living in our home. She owes an abundant amount of money to creditors (private, state, and federal) and yet she lives in denial about the actions she, alone, created for herself in such a negative way. There truly is no handbook for what a parent is to do with children who come back home, with there children, and cause so many problems. She had been in therapy for a time, as a teen, when we paid for it. We identified her problems early on and sought professional help. But as an Adult who seems to be a classic ADHD/BI-Polar, manipulative person, it is havoc on our household because she refuses to do anything to help herself and dares us, her parents, with constant confrontations and fights. We truly don't mind helping with the children (although it has been to our detriment as we totally paid for eveything in sustaining there support), but we certainly do not want her. She has turned out to be demon-seed with no visual means of doing anything to help herself and to stop causing problems. Please give us the handbook or some solid advice on how we, the grandparents, can regain freedom of movement without strain.
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