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Topic : 02/14 Love Smart Island, Part 2

Number of Replies: 194
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Created on : Friday, February 10, 2006, 12:47:04 pm
Author : DrPhilBoard1

It's brutal. It's cutthroat. It's competitive. It leaves you wounded, scarred and absolutely exhausted. We're talking about LOVE! A group of frustrated singles set sail for a getaway on Catalina Island so they can learn how to start "loving smart." Three women, who admit they're very picky, agree to an experiment to see what would happen if they're unable to judge a book by its cover. With blindfolds on, they go out on dates with men who think their appearances might not measure up with what women are looking for. Will these nice guys finish last when the blindfolds are removed? Then, Dillon and Donna have been dating for two years, yet she can't get over her insane jealousy. Will she be able to get her green-eyed monster under control before it runs him off? Plus, the latest on the love triangle among Todd, Hayley and Chad, and your chance to meet these eligible singles! Share your thoughts.

 

Find out what happened on the show.

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February 14, 2006, 6:02 pm CST

Dillon & Donna

Donna Donna-Your boyfriend reminded me of a guy that I dated in my middle 20's.  We met at a seminar where you were to go to the person in the room that you were "most attracted to".  Guess what??  I went to him and he went to me.  His ex girlfriend also  went to him.  I also had issues with myself, my self esteem wasn't too great.  You know what, he always seem to flirt with other girls.  We once went to a party and he left me standing, and was spending all of his time "talking to other girls".  Granted, I did not feel good about this, but on the flip side, he should have spent the time with me.  Anyway, we broke it off and I met this other man who I ended up marrying.   

  

My husband was just the opposite.  He never did those kind of things.   I am a lot older and more self assured, but even today, I would not want to be "married" or be with a person like Dillon.  Yes, you need to feel secure with yourself, and it will come with age, trust me.  If you guys break up, at first it will hurt, but I believe it would be for the better.  You need a guy that thinks of you first, and not someone trying to impress these other women.  Good luck and much aloha..... 

 
February 14, 2006, 6:03 pm CST

Thank you

Quote From: januarymm

That's right Ash.   Meeting you girls and making such great friendships was the best thing from this experience.  These people have no clue what really went on.  We only have to worry about the people in our lives that matter, friends and family.
Thank you for having the courage to admit on national television that you need advice on finding someone who is right for you . I get uncomfortable when my own family makes home videos, but I certainly cannot imagine sharing my life with everyone in the country. I also feel that I am a great catch and should be choosy, so it was nice to hear from someone else who thinks like me. It was also great to hear Dr. Phil's comments because he would probably say something similar to me if I had the guts to face him. Good luck to all of you!
 
February 14, 2006, 6:06 pm CST

Rich environment for over 40, where?

Quote From: spreston

I certainly concur with noted comments from a mature female who has difficulty meeting equals. 

Viewing the immaturity and 'trophy' mentality of the immature female guests is not mainstream 

America and does not represent a broad base that is in their 30-50's who are single, divorced 

or widowed.  That group has sincere voids in establishing relationships with their careers and 

personal commitments. 

I am 56 , run and swim everyday with a vivrant career in retail management, but do not date 

or have any relationships with the opposite sex.   I have no desire to be in the bars/nighclubs 

scene.  I feel I am professional, educated, well-spoken, and moderately handsome.... but  

I attract zero females.   Where is the 'target rich enviornment'  you speak of Dr. Phil? 

  

Dr. Phil, 

We all are having problems with finding Mr. Right or Mrs. Right, it does not matter how old we are.  But I can agree that at 44 where are the "target rich environments" that you are talking about?  I'm just tired of all the game playing that people do, what is so hard about being honest in finding true love?  But yes, would you have these shows to include ages 20-60 or 70.  Or have a younger folks show, and a middle to older folks show to show us what we need to do to change to find someone of the opposite sex.  I am well educated, well-spoken, and consider myself to be an attractive and confident woman, but am tired of the games.  I am so tired.  I am looking for a man who is of the same but yet has content in his personality, character, and soul.  His looks are not what I look at upon the first meeting. His pocketbook I do not look to see how deep it is, but he must work.  I work!  And I love a man in jeans.  So where are the men? 

 
February 14, 2006, 6:07 pm CST

Break the mold, Dr. Phil - come on, I dare you

I, like so many others, would also like to see the situation reversed with average girls and hot guys, but it will never happen because nobody wants to see average women on television.  I'd even like to see the average guys with average or overweight women, because many of these average men wouldn't even look twice at an average woman.   

  

I understand that men are more visual, but why shouldn't they hear this same advice.  Then again it's not that often that you see men on TV complaining about being single or saying that there no good women left in the world.   

  

Come on, Dr. Phil.  Why don't you break the mold and send the average girls to the island?? 

 
February 14, 2006, 6:47 pm CST

January

Depression, drug addiction, physical abuse, these are just a few of the things women suffer from, partially due to social pressure. They are the alternative of positive, strong, and confident. 

So here is what I think of all of you that have berated my daughter and all these girls that went looking for help and got just the opposite from DR. PHIL!  

If another woman thinking she is a 10 intimidates you, it’s only because you aren’t. Men don’t want smart confident women because they won’t be able to get over on them. 

I am very PROUD of my daughter. I don’t want her to marry some mama’s boy (wendeebank) or settle for someone that just wants a maid, a baby-maker, or cook. 

She is very intelligent, independent, and a great mother, she was just lucky to born beautiful as well. She does deserve someone just like her, the best, and an equal to share her life with and not stand in his shadow. Honesty scares you because evidently you can’t be honest about yourself and your life. 

Not since Dudley Moore and Bo Derek has the term “10” been used so much. Did any of you self-righteous judgmental SNOBS notice January laughing when she said that??? My daughter would never callously hurt another person as many of you have here. So when you are watching Dr. Phil again tomorrow, wishing you were someone else, in another world, dreading you meager existence, I’ll be getting calls from my friends and family saying how brave and beautiful January is and how proud they are too. 

 

  

 

  

 
February 14, 2006, 6:49 pm CST

Date - aphobic??

I am 27 and have never been on a date or in a relationship ... I guess I am picky, but I wouldn't say that I am superficial ... the main things I like for other than the initial attraction are being athletic, caring, and non-smoking ... I have tried the online path, figuring that it would be easier because I am definitely on the shy side, but only get responses from the exact opposite of what I am looking for ... I find it terribly hard to meet girls because the most common type of girl I run into are cashiers at department stores or grocery stores ... it is kind of hard to strike up a conversation when the next person in line is giving you nasty stares ... I am not the bar type but don't let that mislead you into thinking that I don't know how to have fun ... I don't have a lot of single guy friends that I could go out with and meet girls ... I am kind of at my wits end ... I don't need a girl to be complete, but I would love to at least get in the dating ballpark!! 

 
February 14, 2006, 7:28 pm CST

i looking for mr right

hi dr phil ? i am looking for mr right .and i love the show tonight it was great . i wish he would come .
 
February 14, 2006, 7:34 pm CST

confused

Im a 41-year-old man single and I have no children. I have been in a relationship with a woman who is 8 years older than I am. She has two kids from two different marriages .she holds on to some of the bad thing that has happened in her past and I feel like she makes me pay a price for it sometimes. We have been together going on 6 years now and in the begging most everything was great. I had to deal with the idea that she couldn’t have any more children and I became ok with it because I love her, for the first 3 years she wanted to get married and I was hesitant. Last July I got a ring and asked her to marry me and she told me she needed time to straighten out her head. I took the ring back. In December she told me I could move in anytime I was ready. But there are problems with the kids. One is 18 and going to college and has been experimenting with drugs and the other is in grade school and is ADHD. Lately she has been telling me and this is her words” but sometimes I feel as if I have to be everything to you and that you don't want me to have any friends and do anything with my friends, just with you.  I feel as if there is no more 'me', that all I am is your girlfriend, or my kid’s mom but that there is no more 'me' anymore.  That I’ve been lost in the shuffle and I don't like that feeling.  I want to be able to hang out with my friends, or go shopping with my friends or go to lunch with my friends/coworkers and not feel guilty about it or feel that you need to come along.”

  

 

We have been going thought this pattern where its like every three months we have a argument and then for good for the next three months and then something else happens and then we have another argument.

  

 

 

  

 

Do you have any insight into what I should do ?

  

 

 

  

 

 

  

 

  

 
February 14, 2006, 7:36 pm CST

02/14 Love Smart Island, Part 2

 Yes I have to agree with a few of the other posters --- where were the people in their 40s and 50s and above. Although we might have some of the same personal problems, we also have the already been married/divorced, and children factors to add into all the dating.  I am 49 been divorced 7 years and think I probably do a good job of avoiding. ;-(
 
February 14, 2006, 7:48 pm CST

Tonight's Show!

Greetings from Atlanta, GA.   I thought your show was great. and looking forward to going out and getting your latest book,(Love Smart). My mom is dying for me to go and get it and read it. She said that she's heard all about the book, and that the book reminds her of me, and all my past relationships.  

Well in regards to tonights show. I could absolutely agree with all those women. How they were so blinded by this guy and his lies. I met a 40 yr old guy on one of the internet dating sites back in June of 05, and he charmed me and said all the right things to me to get what he wanted out of me, then I caught him using my personal home computer to communicate and make dates with other women on line. So the guy on tonights show, (Blondie) he kinda reminded me of how my ex-boyfriend treated me. He couldn't stand to be a one woman's man. He had to have a variety of women running after him. We dated for 6 months, then I had enough and did the bravist thing that I have ever done, and ended the relationship.  

After the girls on the show confronted that jerk, I really felt for those 3 beautiful women and could really understand of what they were all going through.  

  

Now that I have been cheated on many times, I am so afraid that I will not meet the right man for me. and a man that wants a real commitment. and a man that isn't always looking around the corner for someone better to come along.  

  

 
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