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Topic : 02/14 Love Smart Island, Part 2

Number of Replies: 194
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Created on : Friday, February 10, 2006, 12:47:04 pm
Author : DrPhilBoard1

It's brutal. It's cutthroat. It's competitive. It leaves you wounded, scarred and absolutely exhausted. We're talking about LOVE! A group of frustrated singles set sail for a getaway on Catalina Island so they can learn how to start "loving smart." Three women, who admit they're very picky, agree to an experiment to see what would happen if they're unable to judge a book by its cover. With blindfolds on, they go out on dates with men who think their appearances might not measure up with what women are looking for. Will these nice guys finish last when the blindfolds are removed? Then, Dillon and Donna have been dating for two years, yet she can't get over her insane jealousy. Will she be able to get her green-eyed monster under control before it runs him off? Plus, the latest on the love triangle among Todd, Hayley and Chad, and your chance to meet these eligible singles! Share your thoughts.

 

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February 14, 2006, 8:13 pm CST

Shame on you Dr Phil

Dr Phil, you hurt me to my heart with your warning to the horrified Donna that if she doesn't get her act straight the equally horrified Dillon will find himself an ugly woman.  Once again, the "ugly woman" assumes her role as that worst case option, the undesirable booby prize.  If the pretty one is too hard to handle, too hard to get, settle for the ugly one.  In this case, the one who's sole offering to the relationship appears to be that she is "comfortable with herself."   (Why do the strains of the songs "All the Girls Get Prettier at Closing Time," and  "Never Make a Pretty Woman Your Wife"  -- neither of which is complimentary to unattractive women -- suddenly come to mind?)  As one who didn't win much in the gene pool lottery, I like to think I bring more into a relationship than stunning looks and a constant need for affirmation.  I am intelligent, articulate, often funny, active in life and my community, well read, generous, and a world traveler and yet in American society I have little value because I have neither youth nor good looks.  Your poorly worded threat to Donna just perpetuates that lack of value.  Shame on you, Dr. Phil.   And I agree with others in this message board, you blindfolded the wrong gender in the "plain" experiment. 
 
February 14, 2006, 8:14 pm CST

Donna

Quote From: hitechgirl

Dillan may be putting up with her jealous ways, but he had no business in telling other girls that his girlfriend is "jealous".  It doesn't give her a chance to meet the girls and build legitimate friendships of her own.  He is setting her up for failure by "pre-telling" people what she will do.  People can't meet her with an open mind when they have already been told how she will act. 

  

On the other hand,,,personally, I think she should give up modeling if she has such a problem with him looking at other girls.  Does she not mind when men look at her semi-pornographic photos even though most of the men probably have girlfriends or wives?  Does she mind being the source of jealousy for other women?  Seems like a double standard to me.  Put your freaking clothes on and do some respectable modeling if you have to go for that shallow career.  You seem smart,,,use your brain instead of your bod!!!  Your not helping yourself or any other women for that matter. 

  

  

I think it was perfectly natural for Dillon to talk about Donna in that situation - they were all on the Island for a reason, and to share their stories does not seem out of line to me.  Also, its sometimes easier to talk to strangers about such things because you don't have to deal with them later.... 

  

Donna is a wreck.  My initial, not very nice impression was "what a drama queen" - she certainly comes across that way although I realize its out of insecurity.  She, imho, should not be in any serious relationship until she does some serious work on herself.  

 
February 14, 2006, 8:18 pm CST

hi!

Quote From: bowler803

I am 27 and have never been on a date or in a relationship ... I guess I am picky, but I wouldn't say that I am superficial ... the main things I like for other than the initial attraction are being athletic, caring, and non-smoking ... I have tried the online path, figuring that it would be easier because I am definitely on the shy side, but only get responses from the exact opposite of what I am looking for ... I find it terribly hard to meet girls because the most common type of girl I run into are cashiers at department stores or grocery stores ... it is kind of hard to strike up a conversation when the next person in line is giving you nasty stares ... I am not the bar type but don't let that mislead you into thinking that I don't know how to have fun ... I don't have a lot of single guy friends that I could go out with and meet girls ... I am kind of at my wits end ... I don't need a girl to be complete, but I would love to at least get in the dating ballpark!! 

hey!  i am 32.  where are you from?    i am from n.c.    
 
February 14, 2006, 8:26 pm CST

January leaves me confused

We didn't see January sharing anything of depth or value about herself...she mentioned several times that she is a 10 and that she loves herself, but she seems to be an attractive veneer. I hope there's more behind the image. Looks fade. Bodies droop as time marches on. Or, what if she found the "perfect" guy and he was in a disfiguring accident (or if she were)?? Where would that leave them? And would she leave him? Beautiful flesh is easy enough to find. The heart and soul is more elusive. If she's insisting on that chiseled jawline at the expense of being treated well, I would question whether, deep down, she really loves herself as much as she says she does.
 
February 14, 2006, 8:29 pm CST

None of the women on the show were 10

You women might be a 10 if you got rid of the zits, warts by your nose and the girl in the middle needs to fix her teeth desperately. There are no perfect people is my point. The only thing I feel that we all have going for us is how we treat each-other as well as ourselves. Nobody looks at your body when your dead so be the best human you can. You can't be beautiful if your insides are ugly and superficial. 

  

  

  

 
February 14, 2006, 8:32 pm CST

Love Smart Island

Just a quick (at least I'll try to be) comment on the asian girl of her flirting boyfriend.  I was a bit disappointed with your response to her, Dr. Phil, in your advice to her as to how insecure she seemed.  "I" would have told her that, with age, she will learn to listen to her inner gutt instincts regarding the behavior - or misbehavior - of the men she chooses to date.  She obviously didn't trust her boyfriend - and after watching him with the women at the bar (saying he's with her "at this time, anyway" - and sharing what should be private matters between him and her), I agree with her that she SHOULDN'T trust him.  I don't think it's necessarily ONLY her insecurities or bad self-image, but more the fact that she's a young woman who probably doesn't know how to funnel out the flirtatious boys who don't know what THEY want.  Her boyfriend was obviously an immature young man who enjoys having a beautiful girl on his arm, while at the same time playing the field.  She needs to cut the cord and be alone with herself for a while to figure out what she will and will not accept in a relationship.  And to listen to her little voice!
 
February 14, 2006, 8:50 pm CST

Too Quick to Judge?

Quote From: januarymm

You only saw 5 minutes of my life.  What the show wanted you to see.  I am a good person and I deserve the best.  Everyone that really knows me knows I am awesome on the inside.  What they didnt show is the fact that I stated that my main priority is career and motivation.  My attraction to someone may not be Mr. GQ or someone else's idea of hot.  Its my opinion and I have every right to choose who i'd like to date.  Why is everyone picking on me????  Dont judge someone based on 5 minutes or else you are just as shallow as you claim me to be.

It'll be old news soon enough. The reality is that a lot of things have not changed, double standards are alive and well. The Internet can be a nasty place (the things I've been attacked for!). Find those who are like you and you'll be fine. Will you find love? I have no idea. Neither does anyone else. 

 
February 14, 2006, 8:51 pm CST

Vapid and Vain

 Please, Dr. Phil, STOP!!!!  Get some women on your show who deserve the attention.  The women on your show today were not worth my (or anyone's) time.  Give them all a mirror to entertain themselves then find some women who have something to offer....
 
February 14, 2006, 8:56 pm CST

02/14 Love Smart Island, Part 2

Quote From: gv3737

I thought the guys on tonight's show were great!  Especially Marty!  I thought he was charming, witty, and quite handsome.  I only wish that there were more guys who weren't so into themselves here in Florida.  Not all guys in FL are that way but it seems that by the time they get to be in their 40's and 50's, many are into their accomplishments and egos.
You are not kidding! It's like a mini-Manhattan down here in Tampa, where the men think of themselves as the big prizes! What ever happened to the women being attractive and sexy, the pursued? Men here have the attitude "don't settle" because there will be a more attractive one around the corner. If they were more concerned with what they were getting involved with on the inside, they might not get themselves in so many bad relationships. I am very physically attractive, but not perfect....the men here are on some kind of eternal quest for the impossible.
 
February 14, 2006, 8:58 pm CST

My thoughts exactly!

Quote From: jasedny

ok, we saw all the 'babes' and we saw the 'average joe's' but where were the 'average janes'?  do we not count?  maybe, just maybe some hunky guy, or even average joe could look in our direction once in awhile.  my looks may not rate me as a "10"  but for sure my personality does!
I wondered why Dr Phil didn't have a cross section of different types and looks of women - and different ages.    And why only 3 guys?  Why not a larger cross section of men too?  That would have been interesting to find some love connections there.
 
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