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Topic : 02/14 Love Smart Island, Part 2

Number of Replies: 194
New Messages This Week: 0
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Created on : Friday, February 10, 2006, 12:47:04 pm
Author : DrPhilBoard1

It's brutal. It's cutthroat. It's competitive. It leaves you wounded, scarred and absolutely exhausted. We're talking about LOVE! A group of frustrated singles set sail for a getaway on Catalina Island so they can learn how to start "loving smart." Three women, who admit they're very picky, agree to an experiment to see what would happen if they're unable to judge a book by its cover. With blindfolds on, they go out on dates with men who think their appearances might not measure up with what women are looking for. Will these nice guys finish last when the blindfolds are removed? Then, Dillon and Donna have been dating for two years, yet she can't get over her insane jealousy. Will she be able to get her green-eyed monster under control before it runs him off? Plus, the latest on the love triangle among Todd, Hayley and Chad, and your chance to meet these eligible singles! Share your thoughts.

 

Find out what happened on the show.

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February 15, 2006, 2:56 pm CST

love problems of my own

 I thought the show was cute, but I have found (according to "Love Smart") the right man for me.  The problem is he has a girlfriend.  How do I let him know that I'm interested without risking our friendship or trying to break them up?   
 
February 15, 2006, 3:04 pm CST

taking your que

Quote From: cherrypie

Yes people have said "She is shallow, she is this, she is that.  Yes, you should be proud of your daughter.  How do you know that this person watches too much t.v.???  I think people are trying to tell your daughter to maybe change some of her expectations if she does hope to meet that right guy.  I believe that you should not settle for something that you don't want.   Be open to giving a person (that on first meeting)  is not love at first sight  a second or third date.  You can always "fix" certain things about a guy.  Generally if a person really cares about someone else, they are willing to say, wear different clothes, etc.  I know when I met my husband, I had to tell him how to dress.  That was years ago.   I use to pick out his clothes.  I still do.....

Well, I read her other message board posts and got the idea she must watch too much TV becuase she wrote in about a lot of different subjects. I mean, after all, aren't you judging the people from the show with minimal knowledge? 

By "fix", do you mean "change"! Sounds like a double standard there, huh? 

  

 
February 15, 2006, 3:43 pm CST

02/14 Love Smart Island, Part 2

Quote From: ladybug11

hey!  i am 32.  where are you from?    i am from n.c.    
hi ... i am from NJ ...
 
February 15, 2006, 3:54 pm CST

02/14 Love Smart Island, Part 2

Quote From: jda1976

 I thought the show was cute, but I have found (according to "Love Smart") the right man for me.  The problem is he has a girlfriend.  How do I let him know that I'm interested without risking our friendship or trying to break them up?   
well ... i think your decision depends on if he is happy with his current girlfriend or not ... if he is, then you have to step back and respect that relationship ... if he isn't, and note if HE isn't, not that you think he isn't, then you can just stand by him and be a good friend and maybe sparks will eventually fly if he wants to change things ... hopefully that makes some sense :-)
 
February 15, 2006, 6:49 pm CST

Letter from Todd

Quote From: usc2006

Hi Todd.  My teen daughter and I were watching the Love Island shows and to my surprise (she's only 15) she said, "Todd's hot!"  She LOVED that you gave your date the tiny flower on Catalina Island and was even more thrilled that you retrieved it for her when she threw it away.  Give me one tiny wildflower any day over a bouquet of roses.....very spontaneous and romantic. 

  

I'm curious....Why did you appear on the Love Smart shows?  Certainly you weren't having trouble meeting women, were you?  That's a serious question, not a statement.    

  

What kinds of questions do you ask on dates now?  ..... if you don't mind sharing, that is! 

  

Jenny 

  

  

Jenny, 

  

Thanks, if you are the type of girl that knows to hold onto a gesture like the flower then I am sure you will do great.  I am more of a romantic person and I thought the flower would be a nice memory of what we got to experience together. 

  

I appeared on the show because I really wanted to meet someone.  If I didn't meet someone, then maybe I would learn more about myself or someone would see me and write into the show to meet me.  I like having a special person in my life.  I was very commited to my ex fiance who's emotional insecurities unfortunately got the better part of our relationship. 

  

There is a section in Dr Phil's book called infared dating that has great questions to ask.  I learned more about Colleen in 30 minutes with the questions than I did the whole day I before.   

  

The questions I was given to ask Collen were. 

Tell me why you are a great catch? 

What is your biggest regret in your last relationship? 

Tell me something you would never tell somebody on a first date? 

Tell me why you think you'll be a good parent? 

Show me on of your hidden talents. 

  

Good luck! 

Todd 

 
February 15, 2006, 7:11 pm CST

hey

Quote From: bowler803

hi ... i am from NJ ...
thats cool!!     have you lived there all your life!   
 
February 15, 2006, 7:15 pm CST

Thanks Todd!

Quote From: gv3737

I thought the guys on tonight's show were great!  Especially Marty!  I thought he was charming, witty, and quite handsome.  I only wish that there were more guys who weren't so into themselves here in Florida.  Not all guys in FL are that way but it seems that by the time they get to be in their 40's and 50's, many are into their accomplishments and egos.

Todd, I appreciate the reply!  I am in my mid 40's and the game is different.  You and the other bachelors are younger, gorgeous!  professional gentlemen.  I know it is TV but any woman would be so lucky to be in a relatioship with you.  One thing that has served me very well over the years is that I can look into someone's eyes and can gain insight into their personalities.  I would say that in over 9 out of 10 times, I am correct.  I have tried many ways to meet eligible bachelors.  Many guys in their 40's or 50's have been divorced, or are looking for Mrs. Right, or are so wrapped up in their jobs or holding on to their possessions that they simply can't trust or have other things going on! 

  

I realize that the common denominator in all of this is me and I have been on several dates in the last few years.  Maybe it is the luck of the draw but I have met men who want to marry me after the first date or I never hear from them again.  NOTHING in between!  I also realize that, due to circumstances, I have been so self sufficient for so long that it will take me time again to even think as a couple should I get into a relationship or remarry.  I was married for 24 years before my ex-husband's midlife crisis.  The good news is I have two wonderful kids that love their mom dearly! 

  

This year I am trying something different.  I asked God to bring someone into my life if it is the right thing to do.  Either way, I love myself and will find ways to occupy my time.  Hey, I work at the Space Center and since we are gearing up for a new program, I will have Plenty to do! 

  

Thanks again for your kind words! 

 
February 15, 2006, 7:32 pm CST

Hayley's hits and misses

One thing that I've learned from my co-worker is that listening to what people say (and don't say for that matter) is very important. I hope that Hayley has taken the time to watch the Love Smart shows that aired this week to evaluate how Todd responded to her in Monday and Tuesday's show. It saddened me that she continued to pursue Todd after he told her that he didn't want to make a choice by walking with her while the party was going on, nor did he ask her out on the picnic. Personally, I knew he wasn't that romantically interested in her by the way he reacted when she asked if he wanted to take a walk. She did her part in letting him know that she was interested (eye contact, touch and personal space) so there was no need for her to keep putting herself out there. Hayley showed heart and sincerity where a lot of people (male or female) fail. She did a wonderful job in making her feelings known to Todd, but she went overboard in revealing why she was on the show. She set herself up to look foolish. She should have only shared that private bit of information if they were in a more solid relationship. Was she hoping that he would give her a chance just because she wrote into the show to meet him? He knew what he wanted and didn't want to hurt her feelings. I respect Todd's honesty and wish all men were honest. That way, those of us women who pay attention won't hold on to something that isn't going to happen. Wishful thinking can cost us uneccessary emotional hurt and lost time. I know I've learned my lesson from having made the same mistakes that Hayley made.
 
February 15, 2006, 7:42 pm CST

02/14 Love Smart Island, Part 2

Quote From: bachlrtodd

Jenny, 

  

Thanks, if you are the type of girl that knows to hold onto a gesture like the flower then I am sure you will do great.  I am more of a romantic person and I thought the flower would be a nice memory of what we got to experience together. 

  

I appeared on the show because I really wanted to meet someone.  If I didn't meet someone, then maybe I would learn more about myself or someone would see me and write into the show to meet me.  I like having a special person in my life.  I was very commited to my ex fiance who's emotional insecurities unfortunately got the better part of our relationship. 

  

There is a section in Dr Phil's book called infared dating that has great questions to ask.  I learned more about Colleen in 30 minutes with the questions than I did the whole day I before.   

  

The questions I was given to ask Collen were. 

Tell me why you are a great catch? 

What is your biggest regret in your last relationship? 

Tell me something you would never tell somebody on a first date? 

Tell me why you think you'll be a good parent? 

Show me on of your hidden talents. 

  

Good luck! 

Todd 

Hi Todd, 

  

Thanks for your reply.  I just love that infrared dating idea, but I don't need it anymore!  I've been married to an intelligent and gorgeous (and sexy!) man for over 16 years--he truly does get sexier every year.  My husband is a lot like you, so take that as a compliment! 

  

That's probably why my daughter found you attractive, because my husband has set a really good role model for her to look up to.  He even gave her a bouquet of roses for Valentine's Day yesterday.....yes, I got my own gift, too ;) 

  

You know how Dr. Phil talks about deal breakers?  ......things a potential mate might do or say that would break off chances of taking the relationship further? 

  

Can you let us in on a few (non-private) deal breakers for you?  Sometimes mine were important (must want kids), but sometimes they seemed petty but were important to me (must love dogs!).  What about you? 

  

  

 
February 15, 2006, 8:36 pm CST

About all of your dating shows

My first time writing to the show.  I have wanted to do this for a long time and just got up the courage to do this.  I do hope someone on the show staff will read this letter.  Like many of the other letters related to your "Love Smart" show and most of the other Dating shows they are all about young looking people.  I am very "young at heart" and if you look at my profile I sent to you in my registration you will find out more about who I am.  I truly think that somewhere in the U.S., there would be many people my age (or somewhat younger) that really would like to have a meanful relationship.  I would love to talk with someone from your show about having a show with mature, 45 plus age group men and women.  Dr. Phil and Robin are in their 50's and must know there are a lot of us out here wanting a loving relationship like they have.  It truly is one to be admired and one to model ones own relationship after.  You have my E-mail if you wish to contact me anytime.  I would love to talk with someone about my concerns for a loving and soft place to fall relationship.
 
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