Message Boards

Topic : 06/09 Loving Dumb

Number of Replies: 294
New Messages This Week: 0
Last Reply On:
Created on : Friday, March 31, 2006, 12:51:47 pm
Author : DrPhilBoard1
(Original Air Date: 04/05/06) Love -- It can be the best feeling in your life, or it can leave you scarred, wounded and completely baffled. When Jeannie first appeared on the show, she was surprised to learn what men really thought of her. She got a wake-up call from Dr. Phil, but has she put his advice to work and have things changed? Next, Hayley and Chad's romance started to sizzle after their trip to Love Smart Island. When Dr. Phil sends them on an adventure, what does Hayley learn about herself when it comes to relationships, and could you be making the same mistake? Then, Todd, one of Love Smart Island's popular bachelors, is back to face the reality of why he can't find the one. Will he change his game when he meets three new bachelorettes? Plus, find out why men dump women without an explanation, and see a special musical performance that will fill your heart with love. Tune in to find out if you're unlucky in love or if you’re just loving dumb. Join the discussion.

Find out what happened on the show.

More June 2006 Show Boards.

As of January, 2009, this message board will become "Read Only" and will be closed to further posting. Please join the NEW Dr. Phil Community to continue your discussions, personalize your message board experience, start a blog and meet new friends.

April 5, 2006, 3:21 pm CDT

dating but taking it slow

hi I just recently broke up with my boyfriend after 5 years, and started dating someone that I knew from work.  I had fallen out of love with my boyfriend a long time ago, and became attracted to someone that was a customer at where I worked.  Him and I would flirt and finally I asked him if he wanted to hang out.  He said sure, we have been on 4 dates and everything seems to be okay, but he is 9 years older than me and says he wants to take things slow and not just jump into something.  He never calls me, I always call him and sometimes I recieve mixed messages.  Should I be worried, I haven't dated in a long time, is this normal.  I know he likes me but I'm scared that he doesn't sometimes.
 
April 5, 2006, 3:23 pm CDT

STL

Quote From: dt1954

 Hi,  

   I am hoping that Jeannie (from the show) sees this e-mail message.  I think you and my brother  would be a great match.  That is if you're not so shallow as to look for a man that's good looking enough to be on the cover of GQ.    My brother is 45 years old.  He's never been married and has no children.  He has worked the same job for over 25+ years, owns his own home free and clear as well as his Lincoln Navigator.   He doesn't smoke, he's neat in appearance and he's very kind and wise.  He's got a good sense of humor but he also has a serious side.  He can be a lot of fun in the right circumstances.   He likes movies, eating out, dancing, family etc.  He works the evening shift at the air force base in Enid, OK., repairing the flight simulators.   For that reason he doesn't get out too much and doesn't meet many women.  He's been serious twice in his life....but he's very cautious and takes his time in everything he does.  Perhaps too long for the other two girls?  He would make a very steady husband and a good father except that he's now been hurt twice and he's gun shy.  In fact, you'd probably have to call him to make the first date because he's had just as bad of luck with women as you've had with men!   I think you'd be a cool sister-in-law!    Do you happen to live in the Mid-West , as he's probably not going anywhere and he doesn't think that long distance relations work?   Waiting to hear from you!    Thanks......signed:  Big sister looking for a sister-in-law!  :)    

Actually I am on Saint Louis, I am looking for someone closer to my age, I am only 35 (Just) Your brother sounds amazing. I would be a cool sister in law haaa..... I also am pretty planted on STL. My family is the love of my life, ok them & my dog & friends who to me are the Family I chose..... I cant imagine leaving here.... I have such a good life, I do hope one day someone will be so lucky to share in that life with me.    

 

Thank you so much for the support, even though I dont know you It means the world to me.  

 
April 5, 2006, 3:27 pm CDT

ex uses children as leverage to get back with me

 I can really relate to this show..i have been dealing with an ex that will not leave me alone..we have been apart for 5 years ..he has done everything to hurt me including taking my children from me because i can't afford a lawyer to fight for them...i have been re-married for 3 years and he still calls me all the time to ask me out ...i don't mind talking to him about the kids but do i have to do to keep him from asking me out ...because telling him no over and over again doesn't work....he just gets mad and keeps the children from me...Am i the only one in this world with a crazy ex like this if not please help me find a solution!!!!! 

 

P.S. 

I could go on for hours about the horrible things he's done but don't want to bore anyone 

 
April 5, 2006, 3:37 pm CDT

Will anyone ever see past my brain injury!

Dr. Phil or staff:  I sustained a brain injury nearly ten years ago, and as a result now have a huge problem getting past that those first few discussions after meeting.  I honestly don't know what I'm doing wrong, because I don't excessively talk about the brain injury, because the brain injury doesn't define me.  I'm just terribly confused and frustrated because I can't get the guy to ask me out.  Another thing is, most of the time men are fascinated with my story, and what all I've been through, but it's almost as if once they know I have a brain injury, that's it.  I've discussed this with many rehab professionals I still see from time to time, but truly would like a fresh opinion.  I truly am interested in finding out am I just LOVING DUMB?  If so, what am I doing wong, please help! 

  

Getting Annoyed in Iowa, 

  

Sarah Barker,  sjbarker97@aol.com 

 
April 5, 2006, 3:40 pm CDT

I am a 'real' man

Quote From: canadiantr

I honestly can't believe that there are actually "real" men out there! 

I was pleasantly surprised when I heard Todd's story.......  he seems to be the male version of me! 

I'm amazed!   

In this fast-food nation, it's nice to see that there are still people out there who want to hold onto more traditonal values. 

cheers, t 

  

I am a real man, I dont drink, smoke or use drugs....I hardly eat fast-food and I walk alot for excercise.... 

 
April 5, 2006, 3:47 pm CDT

04/05 Loving Dumb

Quote From: bethdolle

hi I just recently broke up with my boyfriend after 5 years, and started dating someone that I knew from work.  I had fallen out of love with my boyfriend a long time ago, and became attracted to someone that was a customer at where I worked.  Him and I would flirt and finally I asked him if he wanted to hang out.  He said sure, we have been on 4 dates and everything seems to be okay, but he is 9 years older than me and says he wants to take things slow and not just jump into something.  He never calls me, I always call him and sometimes I recieve mixed messages.  Should I be worried, I haven't dated in a long time, is this normal.  I know he likes me but I'm scared that he doesn't sometimes.

After reading your message,  I got to thinking....men like a challenge.  Maybe you're too available to him.  You have to make him WANT you,  MISS you,  THINK about you.  And alot of times if you are always there,  they don't have to do those things.  

What I would do is not call him for awhile....see what happens....see how long it takes for him to call you.  Believe me...it will be worth the wait. 

Make it be a challenge,  make him wonder what you're doing and where you are...instead of always lettting him know.  Think about it,  if we have someone chasing after us then we don't feel the need or desire to be with them.  

Good luck !!!!! 

And remember "All Good Things Come To Those Who Wait"....lol 

 
April 5, 2006, 3:48 pm CDT

I'll second that...

Quote From: jim1970

It's nothing with you, personally.  This has happened as a result of 35 years of feminist B.S. 

  

Here's what we have learned through the years: 

  

1.  If we call right away, we are considered "clingy" and are immediately written off. 

2.  If we confess our feelings right away, women "get scared". 

3.  If we pretend you don't exist, YOU WANT US. 

All that and in spite of persistent claims for decades about women wanting equality us guys don't experience women doing their share of the sh*twork that is involved in getting things started.

I've been a liberated guy all my adult life.  This means I'm not the sort of Neanderthal who hits on women for dates.  Needless to say, I haven't been out on one since I was about 20 (the last time I asked a girl out).  I have yet to have a woman approach me for the purposes of finding out if I'm available, would like to get together for coffee, etc.  And there's supposed to be a Great American Man Shortage!  You would think single women and their allies would be scouring the planet to find good, single men.  If women want dates and relationships they should realize that it's action which makes things happen.

Not only that, but then women go on and on about how it's *men* who haven't changed.  Gals: get over your Cinderella Complexes and stop being so passive.


 
April 5, 2006, 3:49 pm CDT

Robert, and the 3 single women

Robert is the poster child of all the men I have ever dated. He seems nice, handsome, intelliegent.....but very ignorant of women and what we need and expect. Dr. Phil needs to help educate Robert on how to treat a woman.
 
April 5, 2006, 3:51 pm CDT

I completly relate !!!

I am really worried about my life style earring that Fraze::::Could it be the fact that your father passed away and wore very close "even friends" for one an other ???? The answer is yes in my case ....and ever since he passed ...Witch we my father and me wore swimming in some waterfalls and he crack hes head open and just went trough the falls unconcient wild I was trying to save him...but by the time I got to him hes body was completely covered in scars and wounds ...it took me over 20Mn's to take him out of the water etc..... I told myself after living this much pain loosing my father...my friend...my guide....my confident.....all at ones....in a tragic way too.......Never I would hurt this way again...so every relationship I had after that  ....of coarse I made my partner happy , but I honestly didn't invest my heart and opened up my communication capability's....by fear of getting hurt again....but making my partners happy I knew it would be all good....but after a couple of years ...I get Bord meaning I want to fell love and give not just material and attentions....but really open up !!! 

I just cant do that its to much a price to pay you know .....Then last year lost my Mom so can you imagine how much i don't want to HURT NO MORE....its to much to bear my heart can take so much I'm a strong woman very confident and all.....and if I get to intimate with someone I have a felling I'll break down and be vulnerable....witch to me is a sign of weakness ....So I stay single ...and attract man that need a shoulder like that  I can easily keep my guard up....but then again I get board of that too....cause what I'd really like is someone as strong and confident as I am !!! 

For the last 8 years I've been going around in circles like this ...and I'm pretty much exhausted...... 

Lily ;;;) 

 
April 5, 2006, 3:59 pm CDT

Don't do anything...

Quote From: travel30

  

I am 31, single, NEVER married and believe it or not NEVER had a relationship....I have tried everything to meet someone......NOTHING works. I love travel and have been all over the world, and enjoy photography, I have NO debts of ANY kind.....doesnt ANY nice girl want me?  

  

  

In a few years you'll consider yourself to be one of the truly lucky ones.

Remember, women really dig jerks - just watch Dr. Phil for a few weeks if you don't believe me.  So if you're woman-free then it must mean you're a saint.  Keep on doing whatever you're doing.  Please don't turn into a jerk to be more attractive to women.  Not all men are fools, some are bachelors.

 
First | Prev | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | Next | Last