Topic : 08/02 "I Love Myself!"

Dr. Phil, you did not stand up for this girl, you let her leave with her "parents", where was your I will have you help "before the sun goes down tonight". She went to you for help, and you let her leave with those monsters, how could you. She reached out, and yes you offered therapy,,,you think that StepMonster is going to go,,,,,,,not in a million years, and IF she does go,,,,she is not going to listen,,,,,I could see that much, and you are much smarter,,,so what is the deal.

I feel bad for the girl.  I hate when parents allow a new person into the picture  that doesn't  seem tocare about their child.  The stepmom is way out of line, along with the father.  How could you drop your child off and then not see them for a year!  I am outraged with these parents.  Shannon might have issues but no one deserves that behavior towards them, ecspecially a child.

Dad just dumped his daughter in that school because of the stepmom's constant whining.  They aren't fooling anybody for a second.  I do not doubt that Shannon has deep-rooted problems, but these two quote end-quote parents just made the problem 100 times worse.  What kind of selfish jerk dumps his daughter in a school for a YEAR and never checks on her?  What kind of jerk treats his daughter like a second-class citizen for a wife who has proven herself more selfish than the stepdaughter?  Apparantly this guy does.   

  

The problem is this guy will read all these posts against him and his "darling" wife and say, "Well, they didn't see the REAL Shannon."  No maybe not, but we definitely saw the REAL Hillary and Robert, and what I saw sickened me.  No matter what teenage angst comes my way from my three kids, I will NEVER give up on them.  These people have serious problems of their own.  Don't get me started on Ms. Hillary.  That woman....GRRRRRRR!!!!!!   

I could not believe how those parents were treating this child.  I know that the child had some issues but some of the things that they said were horrible. 

The deal is that he knew he wasn't going to resolve this issue in one show without having them seek professional help. 

  

She may not go to therapy, but at least getting Shannon in there will teach her alternative ways to cope with her unfortunate situation. 

I have to say that the step-mom is a b****. I hate to come across so strongly, but I had the exact same family issues growing up. My mom died of cancer when I was 5, my sister was 8. My sister always had to be center of attention. So what!? She also got off track, so what! So do all teenagers. All 4 of us kids did. But we turned out okay. My dad married a woman who was overbearing and domineering, the exact opposite of my mother. She brought in two sons. They definitely got the upper-hand in everything. My step-mom tried to insert her parenting roles to us which did not work. The step-mom on this show needs to back the heck out of whatever problems her step-daughter is having. It should be left up to the father and the daughter. That girl has gone through a hell of a lot, and for them to sit there and try to make her act "normal" and to not let her be who she is and have the right to be alittle angry and upset at the world is not right. They just don't want to deal with her, they think it's (whoa-is-me) "too much". Well, what about the daughter, she had no choice? What the heck has she gone through that justifies that fact that the parents "just can't handle it?" They better step up to the plate. Just because things aren't going the way they would prefer them, doesn't mean they have any kind of right to give up, nor does the step-mom have any right to have any input whatsoever for the most part. And she should've never let her own daughter take the other daughter's room. That is crazy, and obviously done out of spite, the troubled daughter is just fighting to get control of her life again, and all the step-mom is doing is taking that away. She is in denial about trying to be a controlling "mother" to the entire family, which she is not. She is simply the woman who married their father, and is looked upon as that. If the mother-daughter bond is to develop, it will develop on its own, and that step-mom just needs to mind her own business and do what she can for herself and her biological children, and be there when the rest of the family asks her for help, but otherwise, she's best just to back off. Just because she wants to have control of the family, doesn't mean that she can, nor should. Every woman wants to be the head of her own household, but these daughters of the father already are heads, and the step-mom has walked in, she needs to respect them as real human beings, and be a mentor to them, but she has to realize she will never take on the role of their mother, it may not be how she wants it, but it is simply a fact, and she had best find ways to be happy as her role of husband's companion and mentor to the step-children, and she should really consider what it's like to lose a mother, and be even more sensitive to them. Just because her house isn't running exactly as she envisioned it, she had just better get used ot that fact, and be a little humble, and let these girls feel the love they need from their father, and know that they are respected from their step-mother. That's what they are really craving here, and the step-mom needs to listen.

Don't bring your SUV-hating agenda here!  We actually drive economy cars, but I get sick of people griping about SUV buyers driving up gas prices.  You don't know much about politics, do you?  Gas prices go up because greedy oil companies have government officials in their back pockets.  They could say some guy in Iraq sneezed to drive up oil prices; it doesn't matter.  Prices go up because the government won't take the time to put the oil barons in check.  Simple as that.  If we all owned cars that only used half gas and half organic products, the gas prices would double or triple because demand would drop drastically, so we'd end up paying just what we're paying now.  Get off your high horse and get back to the topic; the two abusive parents Robert and Hillary.

I am so angry about this show today. It is so obvious that this father is a problem and the step mother is an even bigger problem. This father takes no responsibiltiy for anything. I hope this girl finds a way away from these people. What they did to this girl  is sick.......lying to her that about vacation, dropping her into another country in a place she knows nobody, then not seeing her for a year. giving her room away. and everything else.........I think this is a pair of the worse parents I have ever seen. they want no part of wanting to help this girl.

 Why wouldnt Shannon be upset? Sent off to some boarding school in Mexico for an entire year, father moves in another woman less then 6 months? I believe the new stepmother doesnt like Shannon, there is a huge personality conflict there, and the stepmother has the father wound totally around her little finger and got him to bascially kick Shannon to the curb. People here may not know what some of those out of country--schools for "troubled" youth are like {Read the book Jesusland--a memroir about a brother and sister sent to one] they are run like bootcamps. Why didnt they send her to a normal boarding school? I found the fathers excuses for why they sent her off for an entire year to be extremely weak. I think the true narcassists are him and the stepmother, who do things to serve their own needs, like shipping off the teenager that "annoys" them and going on a cruise.

The parents are refusing to examine themselves and I think seriously blame Shannon for all the troubles in the relationship. The fact that she can be normal and happy among friends, tells me THEY are the problem. Hilary comes across as uncaring and cold to me.  I believe while Shannon may have some responsiblity in yelling and cussing, that her anger does seem very justified.

Dr Phil wants therapy for all of them, but seriously I think Shannons best bet, is to get a job, and seriously part ways. The parents inability to admit any wrongdoing on their part is a huge hurdle.  I wasnt sure of her age, but hopefully she is over 18. Shannon, dont be afraid that you cant make it on your own....you have your health and you can get financial aid for college, once you have been independent for a year in most places. You dont have to cut total contact with your family but at least it can be on your terms and can lead to a betterment of the situation.

Hi, 

  I just went thrue a similar situation with my own daughter......My husband is the step parent, but I met him she was 18 months old! She's now 15...It doesn't matter how bad she is , the goal is for her to get better. She also is taking meds for depression , a decision that was made after about 7 months of intensive therapy , twice a week  in the home setting , it was extremely hard.The meds are only temporary and it was a hard decision , but it made a huge difference. 

  My daughter changed when I started listen to her.....As long as I did not get IT ! She misbehave..... 

 Now she hug me and tell me she love me, I comfort her when she is sad, before she did not let me touch her!  

  Althou we initiate the change, she did most of the work , and I also put my foot down when hubby  cross the line. She wants to move back with dad now, she needs to come in peace with him too.... 

  Good luck for this family........And please , Don't be too harsh with the parents, when we know better , we do better.......