I hope that caught your eye because I am speaking from experience. No, I'm not the drug addict, my daughter is. Her drug of choice was ICE, Crystal Meth. Because of that choice, my life changed in the blink of an eye. Because of that choice, four precious little girls had their hearts ripped out and their lives as they knew it existed no more. They lost their Mother, their Father is in prison, they lost their paternal grandmother (She died), they lost the house they lived in, their dogs died, they lost their friends and the worst of all, they lost their spirits. They will have abandonment issues for the rest of their lives and for what? Because their parents CHOSE to use drugs? It wasn't the children's choice because they were babies at the time. Let's see, seven, five, four, and nine days old! How could it be their choice to use drugs? The seven year old saw it all. How many seven year olds learn how to "spy" on adults to see what they're doing, selling, & trying to be the adult in the house so she could protect her sisters? You tell me if that's right, you tell me if that's fair and then you tell me how your life sucks! These children have gone through more chaos, more upheavals, more destruction than most people ever have in their entire lives.
I ended up adopting all five of my granddaughters and I was 51 years old at the time. Three years ago I had to take early retirement just to be able to stay home and watch them. Is that fair to me? These are supposedly my "Golden Years", but instead of traveling and seeing the world, I'm traveling to pick them up from school or take them to the doctors, to take them to the grocery store...have you ever tried taking five children by yourself to the store or to the emergency room because there is no one else to take care of them but you? I doubt it. Instead you travel to your drug dealer so you can "feel good". Someone cared enough about you Brandon to get you the help you needed and instead of being grateful, it went back to the same old pattern of abuse where it's all about you. That's basically what it comes down to.
You see, I don't complain about adopting my granddaughters because the bottom line is I made the choice to be responsible for them when I said "Yes". I made that choice because I loved them. I don't consider it a sacrifice because I love them and because it wasn't their choice to lose their lives as they once had, they had no say in it whatsoever, my daughter, like you, did have that choice and who do you think suffered the most? You? Her? Hell No! It's your families, friends...it affects everyone around you. It's a domino effect yet some abusers say it's their life and they can do what they want. That may be true, but who suffers the consequences of your actions? I'm sure your family didn't sign up for this, but yet they have to go through pure hell because of what you did. Your Mother needs to stop enabling you and get tough! I personally don't think you deserve to come out of prison. I think you need to take a hard look at your life and see what you have done to the people that love you most in this world. I don't believe drug addiction is a disease. I believe it is a choice one makes. You weren't born with a birth defect that would cause you to use drugs. It's choosing the easy way out. Instead of dealing with life's problems, you choose to drown them with alchohol or drugs. My Mother was an alcoholic, I have a brother who was a heroin addict, still is because once an addict, always an addict. By that I mean you have to stay sober for the rest of your life because all it takes is one time and you're hooked again. I could tell you some horror stories about my life growing up, but thank God I made the right choices to not follow in those footsteps. I don't blame my parents or society for what happened to me. Instead, I kept my faith in God, that He would get me through it and He has. I suppose He had to get me through it so I could be there for my girls. I'm looking out for them because their parents didn't.
If I could say one thing to you Brandon it would be this, "IT'S NOT WORTH IT". You are so fortunate to have parents that love you, when many children die before the age of five because their parents abused them. You are strong & able bodied when others are confined to a wheelchair. Yet many of these people lead more productive lives than you do. Why is that?
You knew what drugs did to your life and yet you chose to do it again. Why? Instead of taking that drug why didn't you pick up the phone and call someone? THAT would have been the better choice. Instead, you decided to take the easy way out for yourself. In your mind, the harder choice was the first. Because then you would be admitting that you still had a problem. Well guess what? YOU DO! It never goes away. The craving will always be there just like when you quit smoking. The urge is there when you smell another cigarette being lit. The easy way is to just take a hit. The hardest way is to turn and walk away.
My daughter made the choice to not get treatment. That choice cost her her children. She got help after the fact. She relapsed once already, but denies it. She seems to be doing better but I can never trust her again. Did you hear that? NEVER. It used to be that when I saw my daughter my heart was filled with love and joy. Now I feel nothing. I don't feel love for her anymore. I can't even tell her that I love her because it's not what I feel. Why? Because there's too much pain, too much hurt and no trust. How can I? Everytime I let her back in, she tore my heart apart again. Is that what you want? You have the time to think about all of this. I'm just telling you what happened to my children, my grandchildren and myself. That's just one story. But I can tell you that there are thousands out there like me. Grandparents raising their children's children because of drugs. Do you know what I resent the most about my son & daughter? They took away the role in my life that I cherised the most, they took away my role as Grandma.
I pray that you will realize how much the choices you have made have caused destruction not only in your own life, but in the lives of those around you as well. Let me tell you, it is nothing short of living a hell on earth and that is something I would not wish on anyone.
In His Mercy,
Barbara
Dr. Phil revisits the story that captivated America. At 21 years of age, Brandon was immersed in drug addiction, prone to violent outbursts that scared his family and left them worried that wouldn’t live to see 22. Dr. Phil conducted an intervention and followed Brandon's roller coaster ride through treatment, relapse and the struggle to get back on his feet. After a year of sobriety, the last place his family expected to see Brandon was behind bars -- but, that's exactly where his disease has taken him. Does black tar heroin have a hold on him? Dr. Phil travels to Harris County Jail in Houston, Texas to find out. He also hears Brandon reveal how a drug addict beats the system. Plus, drug addiction affects not only the user, but the entire family. See the toll it's taking on Brandon’s family and on his parents' marriage. Join the discussion.
