Hello. I too have two children - boys almost 9 and 7.5 with bi-polar, adhd, capd, and now abnormal eegs. I also have a daughter who is 2, but not talking. She is going in for an evaluation. At this point she does not seem to have the type of problems the boys have. 
So far we had Medicaid off and on (New Mexico), but being divorced and a disabled vet, I earn to much, despite I can't work, to qualify for state medical for them. And paying for insurance and co-pays just isn't funny in out situation, is it!?!?! 
I have been doing more of my own research, inlcuding reading the book by the Dr. Dr. Phil had on, and looking into non-prescription alternatives.  
I am now homeschooling as well. This is a first for me. We had IEP's up the wall for both of my boys. By second son has speech apraxia and is still hard to understand by most people;even me some times. I thought of relocating and putting them in a school (4hrs away) that would help them out, but it costs $8,000 a yr per child. I don't know if that is worth the cost or not. I still think about it. 
In the public school my 9 yr old isn't even working at 1st grade level. I figured I would give it a go. If it works good. If not, then I Imay look more into a specialized school. 
I looked into state waivers as well. When you put in for one and do all the massive paperwork, there is still a 5 yr WAIT. That is for medical help, (Medicare/caid), or in home help like respite. 
Being single I understand the need for being away for a while and despite that my ex is VERY helpful, he too has Bi-Polar, can't work, and can't handle being in our home for too long of periods. Even though he is here popping in several times a day, it is more to talk with me, flirt, etc. than playing with the kids, which he doesn't seem able to do. (He came from a very multple abusive home.) 
I lately have gotten very angry, resentful, grouchy, loud, and yelley, but I am working on it with my counselor, and Dr. Phil books! :)