Topic : Interracial Relationships

How much of this situation are you owning?  How badly did you hurt your family when you annoucned that you were dating or going to marry a black man?  What did you say to yourself that made it alright  to get  the attitude that "I am part of your family and you can just get over it"?  You are the one that crossed over the line and caused all the hurt in your family.   

Hello all....I hope someone can give me some advice on how to deal with my family.  I'm a white single mom recently engaged to a hispanic man.  We have been together for almost a year now.  This is the first interracial relationship that I've been in and my family has seemed fine with it until we announced that we are engaged.  Then everything seemed to change.  They are now telling me how they don't approve of mixed marriages and of people having children that are biracial.  My fiance is a wonderful man with a great job, wonderful family values and everything that I have ever wanted in a husband.  He is completely devoted to me and treats my two children as if they were his own.  He wants to have a baby with me soon after we are married and I want the same more than anything.  I wouldn't let him go for anything in the world.  When we are with my family they are fine and they talk with him and treat him good but when he is not with me I constantly hear racial remarks and remarks about how we'll have a "half-breed" baby.  This makes me furious.  My children are very happy with our relationship and they are very much looking forward to our marriage and having a little brother or sister someday.  My worry is my parents will put different thoughts in their head.  My other worry is that my family will begin with the racist comments and things like that when my fiance is around.  I would be totally embarrassed and hurt by this.  I know this would hurt him so much.  The comments when he is  not around are getting to be too much for me to  handle without blowing up at them.  How can I talk to them and ask then to please stop because all I want is a happy family in the future and I know I can have it with this man?  They have no idea how much they are hurting me by their sudden change.   Thanks in advance for listening......

Hello all.......After 52 years living in this world, it finally happened..I met the most wonderfull Hispanic woman..Like a god send she came into my life...

The problem I am having is simple but yet very difficult at the same time...Her son lives with us..He's 21 and has just now joined the work force..He is very spoiled and gets what ever he wants anytime he wants...His mother will jump everytime he wants something and not having his drivers license, she takes him everywhere  no matter what time of day...She will not let him grow up. I get so frustrated, and angry. I'm so afraid that he'll live with us for ever..I so much want to spend my life with her..But not with him in the same house..He won't talk to me, thinking he will derespect his father. He won't even look at me, turns his head everytime he walks by.  Not only that but he physically attacked me on one occasion in a drunken state. beating on me while I was in bed sleeping I forgave him for that , but it still  do not trust him...Any advice will be great...

I have been in an interracial relationship for almost two years now.  My family was upset that we were together and now that we are engaged they have become divided on this issue.  My brother and sister-in-law talk badly about me behind my back and have used my nephews as pawns, stating that I'm not allowed to see them as long as I'm engaged to a black man.  My mother and I have not spoken in five monthes and she has no problem stating that I'm not a good daughter since I haven't broken up with him.  The rest of my family is not as out-spoken about the issue, but don't mind standing to the side while my family is falling apart because of this interracial relationship. 

What do I do to patch things up with my family?  How do I get my family to realize that it doesn't matter what color he is?