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Topic : 12/29 Drunken Mistakes

Number of Replies: 340
New Messages This Week: 0
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Created on : Thursday, October 05, 2006, 04:41:03 pm
Author : DrPhilBoard1
(Original Air Date: 10/10/06) Dottie is concerned for her 22-year-old daughter, Carly, because her drinking is out of control. Carly has already been arrested for driving under the influence, but she still drinks and drives! Dottie fears Carly will end up killing herself or someone else. Carly says she knows she has a problem, but drinking is the only way she can have a good time. Then, Heather and Sierra's brother was killed by a drunk driver, Michael, who also happened to be his friend. Michael received a sentence of five to 11 years, but wants his time reduced. He joins the show via satellite from prison and has a proposal for Dr. Phil. See what Dr. Phil has to say to this offender and talk about the show here.

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October 7, 2006, 4:38 am CDT

Been There

 I was addict for 30yrs. And I had three DUI's. I am sober and clean now for six years. It took also a heart attack to wake me up. I pray to God that I did not hurt anyone while I was driving. I use to take alot of drugs to get away from it all...now I take drugs to stay with it all.

   I hope and pray all people who drink allow others to drive.

 
October 7, 2006, 7:13 am CDT

DRUNKEN GOOD TIME

THIS message is for Carly,  am 16 yrs sober, and believe me u will have a better time at having a good time sober.  it is possible.  I, can tell u.   u will remember everything, see everything, enjoy everything and be a better party goer SOBER.  (and at the same time c past behavior of your-self that u will not believe).  not to mention that if u kill someone, u will live sober the rest of your life in a prison not fully aware of why u r there.  u will know what u did cause others will tell u.  but to spend that much time for something u do not remember. wow.   get help Carly, it is out there.  no one in rehab is going to hurt u only love u.  those dedicated people in rehab want to help u.  reach out and take it.  I GUARANTEE THE RESULTS.  

wishing u the best  Jack Danks, 74 yrs old who knows what he is talking about.

 

GO FOR IT CARLY.  GO FOR IT.  TAKE THE HELP OFFERED.    

 
October 7, 2006, 8:09 am CDT

Carly

Please get help!!! I have a  23 yr.son that went through the drinking stage and it came to a sudden stop when he and one of best friends had an accident and his friend was killed,, all of our lives was changed FOREVER!!  My son is now in prison and he has a 4 yr. old son that hurts very bad because he can't see his daddy. I always told my son not to drive even if he had a sip of  beer, he promised he wouldn't but he did and now he will pay the rest of his life,he is now doing some speaking (but we have all heard it before,) but if it would save one life it's worth it. It is very hard to talk about, i have almost lost my mind. I(his mom) I used to do the same thing, even after the accident, until one day i thought to myself, im being stupid and selfish,, I could have killed someone. I don't want to ever hear of anyone else going through what we have for the last two years.. GO visit a family that has lost a love one. Go visit a prison.  BUT PLEASE DON"T DRINK AND DRIVE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! p.s. Ive been sober for a year!! and im going to stay that way, life is better through a clear mind.  Good luck to all!!
 
October 7, 2006, 8:11 am CDT

scared to death

My husband is an alcoholic and drives drunk.  Just last night he came home after having too many beers and drove himself.  I pray that he gets caught before he kills someone else. He  had heart surgery last March and April and still drinks. I believe he has a death wish for both himself and I.  He repeats himself constantly, doesn't remember things, looses his stuff, thinking I put it somewhere (lost his company cell phone hunting just a week ago).  I read Robin's book and I need to read it again.  I'm scared to death I will loose everything if my husband kills someone due to his drinking and driving. The thing I don't get is he has never gotten a DUI in the 13 years we've been together.  Alanon called that  "a functioning drunk"...... I have the upmost respect for folks that can "kick the addicition".  I will continue to pray that my husband will before it's too late.  I will be watching this episode for sure!!!!!
 
October 7, 2006, 8:54 am CDT

My daughter died falling down 2 steps

Quote From: jackdanks

THIS message is for Carly,  am 16 yrs sober, and believe me u will have a better time at having a good time sober.  it is possible.  I, can tell u.   u will remember everything, see everything, enjoy everything and be a better party goer SOBER.  (and at the same time c past behavior of your-self that u will not believe).  not to mention that if u kill someone, u will live sober the rest of your life in a prison not fully aware of why u r there.  u will know what u did cause others will tell u.  but to spend that much time for something u do not remember. wow.   get help Carly, it is out there.  no one in rehab is going to hurt u only love u.  those dedicated people in rehab want to help u.  reach out and take it.  I GUARANTEE THE RESULTS.  

wishing u the best  Jack Danks, 74 yrs old who knows what he is talking about.

 

GO FOR IT CARLY.  GO FOR IT.  TAKE THE HELP OFFERED.    

 
October 7, 2006, 9:08 am CDT

Even drinking alone can kill!

Quote From: nilysm47

 I was addict for 30yrs. And I had three DUI's. I am sober and clean now for six years. It took also a heart attack to wake me up. I pray to God that I did not hurt anyone while I was driving. I use to take alot of drugs to get away from it all...now I take drugs to stay with it all.

   I hope and pray all people who drink allow others to drive.

My daughter was the light of my life, she worked hard to as an undergrad in phychology and then   a law degree.  She found a wonderful job in Washington, D C.  After a break up with her boyfriend she moved and was very lonely.  One day in March we were talking on the phone and I could tell she was drinking.  My husband and I talked to her about the possiblity of getting hurt, and she told us she was going to stay home and not drive.  The next day we received a phone call from a detective, she was found at the bottom of  steps dead.  They think she only walked up two steps and fell backward with such force she hit her head, hemoridged and died.  She was home alone, so it could of happened anytime within a ten hour period.

 

I am having a very hard time functioning, I loved her so much, and she was my only child.  She left many people with much heartache. She worked so hard, traveled, had many wonderful friends, but started drinking during break up with boyfriend.  She said it made her feel better and wasn't so lonely.  She was 32 years old, everything she worked so hard for was coming to fruitione.  It is not just drinking and driveing that can kill you or others. 

 
October 7, 2006, 9:59 am CDT

Carly

Quote From: jackdanks

THIS message is for Carly,  am 16 yrs sober, and believe me u will have a better time at having a good time sober.  it is possible.  I, can tell u.   u will remember everything, see everything, enjoy everything and be a better party goer SOBER.  (and at the same time c past behavior of your-self that u will not believe).  not to mention that if u kill someone, u will live sober the rest of your life in a prison not fully aware of why u r there.  u will know what u did cause others will tell u.  but to spend that much time for something u do not remember. wow.   get help Carly, it is out there.  no one in rehab is going to hurt u only love u.  those dedicated people in rehab want to help u.  reach out and take it.  I GUARANTEE THE RESULTS.  

wishing u the best  Jack Danks, 74 yrs old who knows what he is talking about.

 

GO FOR IT CARLY.  GO FOR IT.  TAKE THE HELP OFFERED.    

 My husband and I used to drink but we were statring to become ugly with each other we decided this kind of life was not for us and stopped with the help of AA we were headed for divorce it has been over 25yrs now sober and nothing good happened until we sobered up and then my son was killed by a drunk driver he had parked his car to go and see Erik Clapton knowing he would have a beer and knowing NOT to drink and drive was walking back to his hotel when it happened he was 28 & left behind a 6 mths old wife and a 2yrs yr old daughter their life has never been the same nor has ours I don't see them anymore because my daughter-in-law went of the deep end my daughter misses him and my Grandson will never meet his Uncle Tony. Carly you take any help that is offered get back into life, you can get wonderful results helping others, but you need to help yourself first. Carly take a good look in the mirror you are killing yourself in a slow painful ugly way and affecting everyone else who is around you. Carly you deserve better than that my prayers are with you. It makes me sad that you are in such a destructive mode take care
 
October 7, 2006, 10:09 am CDT

drunken drivers

Quote From: closson_6

Please get help!!! I have a  23 yr.son that went through the drinking stage and it came to a sudden stop when he and one of best friends had an accident and his friend was killed,, all of our lives was changed FOREVER!!  My son is now in prison and he has a 4 yr. old son that hurts very bad because he can't see his daddy. I always told my son not to drive even if he had a sip of  beer, he promised he wouldn't but he did and now he will pay the rest of his life,he is now doing some speaking (but we have all heard it before,) but if it would save one life it's worth it. It is very hard to talk about, i have almost lost my mind. I(his mom) I used to do the same thing, even after the accident, until one day i thought to myself, im being stupid and selfish,, I could have killed someone. I don't want to ever hear of anyone else going through what we have for the last two years.. GO visit a family that has lost a love one. Go visit a prison.  BUT PLEASE DON"T DRINK AND DRIVE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! p.s. Ive been sober for a year!! and im going to stay that way, life is better through a clear mind.  Good luck to all!!

I am quite familiar with drunken drivers and husbands, I have lived with them enough years, and just finished a book about this man and his drinking and what it did to the family and himself over the years.  He got fired from a good state job drinking on the job, all the time, hot checks all over town. In 1982 he got fired, went to jail all the same day, sobered up in jail then was forced to go to treatment at the VAlley HOpe Center here in town, for 30 days.  He was scared to leave the safety net of Valley HOpe, as the cruel world and drinkers were still out there and he was sober.!!

he learned to eat that food was good any time of day, and lots of choc ice cream and choc bars also.  But sad to say he went to treatment to get a monkey off his back, the judge and me.!

Okay this lasted till about "85" when we moved to Tx, then he started sneakin vodka, since vodka has no smell he thought it was safe, beer smells and comes in bigger bottles.  I think i have lived with and seen about everything a acholohic can do.

WE divorced in "93", he remarried and once again went to treatment this time at the VA center, all for the wrong reasons again this time to get his boss and present wife off  his back.

He never got a ticket for drinking and driving as this a small rural town and the cops just escort them home or take them  home.  Some times some one gets a ticket but usually the young people not the older guys.

The other wife divorced him, then he really got with the drinking, lost job after job, plus a fancy pickup.  Finally he got old enough to get his social security then he quit trying to work, he lived in a low income apt and could pay his rent, his car expenses and have enough money for cheap beer everyday.

He had a 5 by pass with pace maker but still did not quit drinking, his heart Dr and i kept encourageing him to quit drinking, okay after this six pack he would, well he fell  and broke a hip, that surgery went fine, but his bp bottomed out so they put him in ICU but his heart just got tried of working so hard to fight the beer so it just quit on him and he faded away.  he died a pauper as the beer took all his money, the VA hosp had to bury him ==cremate him.  i went  to the service it was sad only 5 people attended, not even the Pastor from the church he attended for years and was a assistant sunday school person was there or went to the funeral home to sign the book.

All i can say leave the booze alone, it does you no good nor your family, you can have a good time with coffee, tea, pop, or water and know what you are doing and what you done the next day.!  Nothing good comes from going to bars or parties that there is a lot of drinking.  NOTHING~~!!!

i HAVE SEEN families that let the young little toddlers drink the beer they find in the cans their parents leave sittin around, also i have seen parents put beer in the babies bottles.  Now that really goes against my grain.!!

I have been involved with the AA/Al Anon program for many, many years and know what the program is about a very good worth while program, but you have to work at it and WANT TO STAY CLEAN AND SOBER!! 

 
October 7, 2006, 11:24 am CDT

Get help now

This is for Carly. Girlfriend you need to get a grip on your drinking. I'm 49 yrs old and drank from the age of 15 til I was 40 yrs old. It was hell out there for me. I drank to get away from my mom. I started drinking and doing recreational drugs because at 15 I was raped by a stranger and the only way I could be around a male was to drunk or high. My first real drunk was at 15 in the school auditorium. I drank a half pint of Southern Comfort. Never did I drink that again. At 19 I was engaged and was raped again this time by my former boss. Never did make it to trial because I didn't want my fiance` to know that me and my rapist had had a one nighter at work. I dropped the charges. That then took down the road of oblivion. I drank to get drunk and shut out my feelings. My stepfather died when I was 22 from cancer. From that day forward I watched my mom drink herself to her grave for 17 yrs. During that time I was in the bars every night. Drinking and getting drunk then getting behind the wheel of my car. Fortunately I never killed anyone, hit anyone or anyrhing while under the influance. I would travel miles away to get drunk. Never had a DUI. The cops weren't interested in me at the time. They would now. When my mama died in '96 I went on a spree of all sprees. I was now drinking, smoking pot and doing cocaine. Mar. 30,1997 I walked into AA. For the next 6 yrs I was very involved in service work. Then I moved 2 days after my 7 yr anniversary. I moved from one state to another to be with the "man" of my dreams. Turns out he wasn't. We lived with his mom and year 7 was ok. However I stopped going to meetings and using a sponsor and shut God out of my life. Guess what? May of  '06 I went back out and trashed the 8 yrs I had. All because I thought I could drink socially. Well this time around it took me 3 weeks to do what I did in 25 yrs. I lost my fiance`, was kicked out of his moms house, got an apt. and in a month lost it and my job. If it weren't for me reaching out and asking for help I would have a roof over my head.

 

So please put it down now. You're young and a pretty girl. Don't waste it on alcohol. You're young, and can probably get a good job. get help and start leading a good sober life. Don't become a statistic like the others. There's only 3 places you can go if you continue to drink. That's Jails, instittutions and DEATH. As long as you can get help all you need to do is DON'T DRINK, GO TO MEETINGS AND GET A SPONSOR. In the progaram the 3 things that are essential to your program are, HONESTY, OPENMINDEDNESS AND WILLINGNESS. Y ou have to be honest about what you are, openminded to the program and willing to change. I hope and pray you don't follow my path. Take care and may God Bless you.  Hugsssss, Lesley P.

 
October 7, 2006, 11:34 am CDT

Get real and take a stand

 

This is ridiculous.  If Carly is drunk and someone is there watching her get in a vehicle, take the bleeping keys away from her.  She obviously has a problem if she "can't have fun without alcohol."  If and when she ever deals with that problem is up to her.  For the sake of the rest of us on the road who do drive sober.............take the keys away.

 

Yeah, we all say its sounds harsh until she is dead, or God forbid she puts someone through the pain and torture of killing their loved one.  Some tough love is due here.  Take her vehicle for a period until she does drive only when sober, call the cops when she is driving drunk, or take the keys away until she is sober............make a stand and save a life.

 

I've taken keys away and called cabs.  I've called the cops on people I could not reason with.  I've taken my neices car away when she would not listen.  And I too had to seek help for addictions.  Stop the sensitive BS and take a stand with this obvious hurting and irrisponsible person/child and step in and put down some boundries.  Be a parent and do your job.  Someone do something other than stand by and watch this horribly inexcusable behavior go on and on until a horrific tragedy strikes. 

 
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