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Topic : 01/26 Bullies

Number of Replies: 388
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Created on : Friday, January 19, 2007, 01:29:59 pm
Author : DrPhilBoard1
Bullying has been making front page news and causing outrage across the country. It’s a dangerous trend that has grown out of control. Dr. Phil plays a disturbing video that has been broadcast all over the Internet and news. Three high school girls brutally pummel a young girl while a video camera captures every slap, punch and horrifying kick. Steve Levy, the Suffolk County Executive, joins Dr. Phil via satellite, to discuss the vicious attack. Then, Natasha is a 15-year-old bully who admits that she has no problem pushing, hitting and cursing out any student who doesn’t do what she says. Natasha faces off with Sarah and Dory, two girls she continually taunts at school every day. Will Sarah and Dory retaliate by resorting to “mean girl” behavior, or will all three come to a compromise? And, Dr. Phil’s son, Jay, has an empowering message for the teens. Plus, the school principal and the parents of Natasha, Sarah and Dory weigh in. Have you been the victim of a bully? Share your story here.

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January 20, 2007, 3:02 pm CST

Bullies in the Workplace

 

A bully does not discontinue this behavior when they are 18 or 22.  The school yard bully continues acting out, carrying their insecurities into the workplace.  Europe has laws to protect employees from bullies in the workplace, but the U.S. does not - yet.  (Please refer to the two excellent web sites I reference at the bottom of this note.)  Their methods are tweeked a bit to fit the environment (setting people up, spreading untrue rumors, etc.), but they get the same results.  If the employer is unwilling to correct the situation, tackling the issue immediately, an employee has no protection.  Mentally healthy employees leave to find a more accepting company, draining the intelligence away from employers who allow this type of behavior to continue.  So many of us can relate, I believe this topic would make an excellent show.  Thank you.

 

http://www.prbmp.com/pagr418.htm

http://www.legalmatch.com/law-library//article/intentional-infliction-of-emotional-distress-by-employers.html

 

Victoria

Wichita, KS

 
January 20, 2007, 5:24 pm CST

My Grandson Was Bullied

 

I think bulling at school needs to be stopped one way are another. My Grandson was going to school here in Cameron, Texas, & almost ever day he was bullied by some children. He is a very sensitive, caring, & loving boy & little over weight for his age. Everyday he would go home crying because kids made fun of him, called him names & hit on him. They would say vulgar words to him. by all means he is not an Gael either, but he has had to go to ER 's because of some of things that has happen. He would always get punished at school for something the other kids was doing. My daughter went to the school numerous of times to talk to the principal & they always said that they would watch & see. Well, the next day would be the same old thing. She would go again. He was failing in almost all classes here. Nothing ever was done. So this year, my daughter changed schools for him & his younger sister. It is a much smaller school district & now there is no more bulling & he is passing with A's & B's. That is the difference in a child that is being bullied. It must stop. To all parents out thee, pay attention to what your children tell you. Investigate it at school like my daughter did. She saw things with her own eyes & that didn't even help. So really pay attention to your children. That may make all the difference. We love all our children no matter who they are. Thank you for reading this. I hope things get better in school. Dr. Phil, YOU PUT A STOP TO THIS IF AT ALL POSSIBLE.

 

dladler This is for my loving Grandson

 
January 20, 2007, 5:52 pm CST

snobs and egomanics, rude & crude and bullies - what a week!

with all the prospects of what's coming next week, there's no mention of DONALD TRUMP?  how can he be overlooked when his persona could be applicable to 3/5 of the shows?  perhaps devoting an entire week to him?  oh, sorry - that might affect the viewer percentages!!   surely, a good topic, however, of "HOW COME he can get away with being so full of bluster and take himself so seriously"?   and what IS with the whole "emperor's new clothes" deal with his hair?  does NO one in his realm have the nerve to tell him the truth?   where are the "what not to wear" folks?
 
January 20, 2007, 6:22 pm CST

Bullies

Bullys are not only in the schools, but in adult work places. It is on the rise. There should be public discussions on this so that it can brought out in the open. Many times adults are really embarrassed to discuss being bullied in the work place because it is something that happens on the playground. Not so. If you would do research on this you would find out that there is a "bully epidemic" going on, and people are getting terribly hurt because of it. This could be the reason for violence in the work place. People can only be pushed so far before they really lose it, and then a real tragedy happens. Then people wonder why Mr nice guy, or Ms. Nice woman lost it.

Thank you for addressing this problem as well.

 
January 20, 2007, 6:24 pm CST

01/26 Bullies

Now that I'm grown up , I understand that all bullies are are people who feel so badly about themselves, they want others to feel the same way they do, once I discovered that, I chose to not let them bother me, but I'm not scared to stand my ground either male or female, whatever though I will NOT reduce myself to physical fighting or name calling, okay that from an adult.

For kids its different, and girls are the most vicious of the lot, honestly, ladies we are NASTY, but where do these kids learn it from ?

Are they bullied by their parents ? Is it on TV ? Do we tell ourselves, "well better than letting people bully him/her ?

What I don't think bullies "GET" is it will bite them in the ass someday, someone bigger will come along, or the kid who looks like a "Wimpy Nerd" will actually have a Black Belt they are unaware of, and I submit to those who bullied someone like Bill Gates, do you now work for him ?

 
January 20, 2007, 7:24 pm CST

Bullies

I would like to start off with THANK YOU for doing these kinds of shows. I am 30 years old now but you could not pay me a million dollars to go back to those days.

I was picked (harrassed) on from the 2nd grade ALL THE WAY through HIGH SCHOOL.  IN EVERY SINGLE GRADE!!!! In 6th grade, someone put a dog biscuit on my desk with a note that said go back to the dog house where you belong! Everyone laughed at me when I sat down. I sat down and cried with my head in my arms at my desk. I've been bullied when my sister was alive who was severely handicapped and they use to say are you stupid like your sister and they'd say I hope you're sister dies soon. My sister IS my world and although she passed in 1985...none of them could go through what I went though. I was beat up especially in 7th grade, slammed in lockers, someone tried to take a pair of shorts off of me cause she said they were hers. I got put in a group home for running away from home when I was 15. And that school was pretty much an all black school and I was ganged jumped a few times. Once in a classroom while class was going on and the teacher sat at his desk and watched them do it, then he got up and left and no one saw him even after school.

Do you know what kind of mark you leave on these people when you pick on them to no stop? You may be a bully but there will be one day when that'll catch up to you and then you'll know how it feels. I made the cheerleading squad at the all black school I was at, I pretty much had to quit b/c the same group of girls would always boo at me at games and stuff. Let me say one more thing to these poor kids getting picked on...always remember you're a beautiful person and in 15 years, it won't matter. It still hurts me to this day to think about the things that's happened to me but I'm married now AND I do modeling on the side as a hobby...And I'm just now realizing AT 30, I am a beautiful person, I'm not a dog ugly or whatever they called me. I wish I would have known that back then cause I think I could have done a WHOLE lot more with my life such as modeling, I didn't because I always thought I was the ugliest thing in the world and just a mat at the door that people walk on....now i regret it. It's ok though cause the victims are gonna move on and be somebody and those bullies will still be bullies. Thanx for hearing some of my story..................good luck to you guys, I've SO been there and I promise it'll get better...Keep Your HEADS held hi

 
January 20, 2007, 9:04 pm CST

Heart broken mommy....

My son has been bullied at his school since kindergarten.  I didn't realize that it was happening until he started throwing up everyday before school.  I finally sat down and asked him what was going on and he told me that several boys at school were beating him up at recess.  I decided to go to the school myself to see if I could catch the boys beating up my son.  I sat there for over an hour until the children came out for recess, no sooner did my son get on the playground the boys were running up behind him and threw him to the ground.  I looked at the supervisors on the playground to see what they were doing and every single one of them were huddled into to groups talking.  I got out of my car and ran over to assist my son, I had every intention on just taking him with me but I didn't want to get into trouble for taking my son off of the school property.  I decided to then go into the school and talk with the principal about what I had just observed on the playground.  The principal  told me and my husband that their supervisors aren't paid very well so you basically get what you pay for!   My son is now in the fifth grade and he still continues to deal with bullies on a daily basis.  My son tries to make friends with other students but they turn him down and tell him that he cannot play with them.  It is heart breaking as a parent to feel so useless in this type of situation.   We've even tried to get the superintendant to meet with us and he replied that is unusual for him to meet with parents.  I have discussed this issue with other people and they feel that I would have a strong legal case against the school but I would rather not have things go that far.  I had wrote a letter to the Dr. Phil show and was given an invitation to be on the show with my son  "Bullies Caught On Tape" but after discussing it with my husband he felt that it might alienate my son even more.  We have taken our son to counseling but that doesn't stop him from being bullied at school.  One day I asked my son to write down how he felt about school, these were his exact words:

 

It feels like that I don't want to ever go to school again.  I just want to make them take those words back.  Or I just want to go to a different school.

I have to deal with this every day of my life except for Saturday and Sunday.   With people make fun me and my friends and hurting us just feel like making them pay back.  And it frustrates me, makes me feel sad, and angry like I just want them to hurt until they can't take it anymore.

 

My heart truly breaks for my son and I'm not really sure where we go from here.......... 

 
January 20, 2007, 9:11 pm CST

Bullies all over in disguise

This subject is near to the heart as I have had personal experience in many factors of my life such being a child, work place environment, mental health professionals etc.  They all have the same end result and unfortunately succeed.  I believe this subject is very wide and covers a lot of ground and would take an inordinate amount of time to nail down. 

 

It seems they are winning and there aren't enough resources out there to help the every day person.  Too bad as many lives are ruined in the process of becoming healthy people who can contribute to the community. 

 
January 20, 2007, 10:02 pm CST

01/26 Bullies

"Most"  bullies I knew in school had parents who were not connected to their kids, though htis may not be the case for  some, I can almost bet most of them are from horrible home lifes and maybe it's the paretns who need to revaluate their life styles and how they are raising their kids. And one thing I absolutely can't stand is the parent who has the attitude /My child wouldn't do sucha  thing. I believe life begins at home and chancesa re the way the child behaves is a reflection upon the home life. again, may not be the case for all, but we, the parents are the promary examples for our kids...........................
 
January 21, 2007, 6:07 am CST

This is why I Homeschool

My daughter was bullied last year in Kindergarten and in Girl Scouts. I am one of the Girl Scout Leaders and I do intervene for my daughter and the other girls. But being in that situation gave me insight into the teacher's problem of dealing with bullies. Anyway, little girls are nasty, they usually don't show physical aggresion, they bully emotionally. My daughter was made fun of during class and recess. She was laughed at by one little girl, mainly, and whoever that little girl had chosen to be "popular" with her for the week. This was Kindergarten! We are in the military and live overseas so at the begining of the year (1st grade) we were in the states on vacation so I went ahead and put my daughter in school there so she wouldn't get behind. Because of the bullying the year before, she would not do anything outloud in class, even if the whole class was doing it. I was so frustrated because the things I knew she was learning we studied at home but she would have pop tests at school on things I wasn't aware of and she would fail. I was so scared she was going to fall behind on the basics that I pulled her out of school and began homeschooling her. She is doing so good now and her confidence has soared. Plus she thinks it is so special that she doesn't go to "public school" (her words) that when the little girl in Girl Scouts tried to bully her she would look at her and tell her that she is homeschooled and just smile and walk away. She is involved in other activities and I make sure she is around other children but she is NEVER laughed at as she struggles to learn a new concept and the fact that she is learning now makes her so much more self confident. I know everyone is not able to homeschool and I thank the Lord that I am. I just want to say that I do NOT blame the schools or the teacher. A laugh while you are struggling to learn hurts wether the person is punished or not.
 
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