Message Boards

Topic : 08/02 Explosive Anger and Its Aftermath

Number of Replies: 269
New Messages This Week: 0
Last Reply On:
Created on : Thursday, March 29, 2007, 12:45:35 pm
Author : DrPhilBoard1
(Original Air Date: 04/06/07) Do you know a happy person who, if crossed, will explode in an instant with uncontrollable rage? Intermittent Explosive Disorder may explain why Dr. Phil's guests suddenly lose their temper, break things and even hurt other people. Carrie lives with constant uncertainty. She says her husband, Bob, can be totally calm one minute and be fist-fighting the next. He yells and curses at her, flips off other drivers and hit another man so hard it knocked his eye out; an act of violence that landed him in prison. Where does Bob's anger come from? After Dr. Phil shows Carrie and Bob a video of a previous guest, will Carrie decide to leave the anger prison she's been living in? Then, Traci says her 17-year-old daughter, Melinda, is tearing their family apart. In a matter of seconds, she can go from being a loving daughter and sibling, to throwing blenders and threatening her sister's life, for no apparent reason. Melinda says she's so full of anger that when she gets upset, she feels like she's going to explode. Do her mother and sister deserve the treatment they're getting, or is there something much deeper underlying Melinda's rage? Tell us what you think!

Find out what happened on the show.

More August 2007 Show Boards.

As of January, 2009, this message board will become "Read Only" and will be closed to further posting. Please join the NEW Dr. Phil Community to continue your discussions, personalize your message board experience, start a blog and meet new friends.

August 2, 2007, 4:19 pm CDT

thanks

thank you dr phil for being there when i needed you.  you are helping me grow up even though i am 56......lol

debbi
 
August 2, 2007, 5:11 pm CDT

Reason for explosive anger

I just wanted to share my experience with this type of person. First of all, there are usually biochemical reasons behind this type of behavior. No one wants to be this way, they just don't know the way out.

 

I personally had some issues with this until I began a program that addresses the issue of Sugar Sensitivity. It's not a well known biochemical issue but many people have it. This program helps me to heal my unbalanced biochemistry and gets rid of the Dr. Jekyl/Mr. Hyde syndrome.

 

Being a person who is explosive is frustrating and scary. We don't enjoy being this way. The feeling of "power" we achieve through our outbursts is shortlived and followed by tremendous amounts of shame and confusion.

 

I can't speak for everyone who is explosive but I can speak for myself in saying that I don't blow up because I feel entitled. I am that way when my blood sugar, serotonin and beta-endorphins are low. When I eat the right foods at the right time for my body, I'm calm and steady and can handle whatever life throws at me without losing my cool. I am clear headed and can problem solve quickly and efficiently. The key, for many of us, is learning how our bodies work biochemically, and learning what it takes to heal and stay balanced.

 

Have a wonderful day! And if you know someone who is explosive, maybe they could look at the issue of sugar sensitivity! It wouldn't hurt and it could help!

 

Casey

 
August 2, 2007, 5:21 pm CDT

Sensitivity to sugar can be behind this behavior

Quote From: momma_bear1

The second story on this show is my sister in a nutshell! She is the most loving person you could find one minute and two minutes later she is screaming, cussing and slamming doors. As I was watching this show she is the first person that popped up in my head. It was amazing how much of a resemblance in attitude she and this girl have. It is very frustrating...especially when she is staying in my home.

Does your sister like sweets? Does she eat a lot of sweets? Does she like things like pasta, bread, pop corn? She is displaying signs of being sensitive to sugar which can cause a Dr. Jekyl/Mr. Hyde reaction. It's a biochemical issue and can be helped by eating the right foods at the right times for her body.

 

I too am like this when my blood sugar, serotonin and beta-endorphins are out of balance. If she is sensitive to sugar she won't be able to fix this issue on her own. But it is fixable. When my biochemistry is balanced, I have no issues with explosive anger NO MATTER WHAT GOES ON AROUND ME.

 

Someone who is not sensitive to sugar will not understand that this is a real issue. But those of us who are sensitive are grateful to find that it's not our fault. When we say we don't know why we explode the way we do we mean it. It makes no sense to us and it's not something we can just stop. It doesn't take willpower and strength. It takes knowledge and commitment to healing the biochemistry.

 

Help your sister out...do some research on the internet about sugar sensitivity. You could help change her life!

 
August 2, 2007, 5:31 pm CDT

I understand your confusion

Quote From: fightn4change

 I am so affraid that others see this in me.  I am so quick to blow but why?  I think I know why at the time but to hear my mother i just have issues.  This show today makes me wonder as a mother if I am in need of a medical check? My son just said NO MOM YOU ARE NORMAL??? Whats the difference of what I recognized today and what my child says obviously that he has seen and identifys as normal?  I am confused.

It is scary when we see what we must look like to others. You are not alone in this. Millions of people are this way. It could be that you are sensitive to sugar which means you have a special biochemistry that overreacts to sugar or white flour products that act like sugar in your body. Does this sound like it could be you?

 

If so, please do some research on sugar sensitivity. You can find the answers to the questions you are asking.  Don't worry, I'm not trying to sell anything. I'm just letting you know there is a way out of the darkness you may be feeling. I am finding that if I eat the right foods at the right time for my body I can heal the imbalance in my biochemistry and find peace. When I do this, I don't overreact to things and I feel calm and confident. And I eat normal, every day food, not wierd stuff.

 

I hope you will seek the answers to your questions. You, too can find healing and happiness.

 

Peace to you!

 

 

 
August 2, 2007, 5:38 pm CDT

Explosive anger...

After looking at today's show, I was so depressed. I recognized my own husband.  He is OUT of control. He yells at people if they cross the street in front of our car, he gives them the finger if they so much as look at him the wrong way, he won't talk to me for sometimes 2 weeks because he is angry or stressed, he'll slap the kids and send them to bed (sometimes at 5h30) if they talk too loud, he breaks things such as phones, lamps, remote controls, cell phones, toys, our car when he gets mad (for example if the children are arguing), he'll yell at people who call for surveys and such, he swears at our children - calls them names such as Ass, Stupid, Dumb. He can be nice for one or two days, and then bam - treats us like dirt for the next week.

I know what people would say: well what are you waiting for to get out of there? Why do you stay? Three young children (6, 4 and 10 months) and I work full time (days, nghts and somtimes week-ends). I don't know what I would do if I were left alone to deal with everything that comes with it - I mean the house and car payments, daycare, work, the bills, school, homework, the baby teething...How do people do it? How do they survive a separation? And the children? They love their father, and so do I. 

My question is...How do you get someone to seek help? I've told him over and over that he has issues. He's angry. He's depressed. And he doesn't know how to deal with it. I used to think he was manic depressive. But now I think he just can't handle his responsabilities. I've asked him to seek help but he refuses - he doesn't believe there's anything wrong except that our kids are out of control (which they are but that's another problem).

My batteries are running really low...I don't know how much longer I can be the glue that holds us together...Any ideas anyone?

Isabelle

 
August 2, 2007, 5:39 pm CDT

You are sugar sensitive my dear

Quote From: yminton

I have regretfully missed the first half of this weeks shows, but today at 15 til 3 Dr. Phil popped in my mind. My fiance' was leaving for work and my son was watching Barney. I decided I would take a break from the daily chores and watch the show today. It felt as though Dr. Phil was talking to me, when he was talking to the two guest on the show. I could relate with both of them to a certain extent. I have not ever been physically violent, but I shoot off at the mouth, before I realize what I'm saying.

 

It is very embarrassing to know that I behave this way. I'm not a mean person either. As the female guest was saying, "this isn't me". It's hard to admit that I say some of the things that people have told me about. I knew once this show would be over, I would be receiving phone calls. I had to turn the ringer off so that I could watch Oprah also. As soon as the show was over, I turned my phone on and started going through the caller ID. Sure enough, my fiance' had called from work, my mother called and my best friend called me just a few minutes ago. She didn't say anything to me about the show until I brought it up to her. She then said that her and her husband watched it together saying, "that's Yvonne". Then she was quick to tell me that they said it out of love, I knew that she said that to keep me from being angry by what she said.

 

I have said hurtful things to my fiance' that when I'm not in an "episode" , I think to myself that I would never say something like that to anyone. Then when I'm mad this anger and the words and the attitude just flies out of me. It's true, it's like it's another person living inside of you, just waiting for someone to tick you off.

 

I have been on 4 different medications for depression and anger management. Some seem to help, then a few months after taking them, I'm back to my old self, like my body gets immune to it. I don't want to live on anti-depressants to be so called "normal". I hate taking medications, but I hate being so angry. I am miserable living this way, and I know I make my family miserable too. My son is 3 1/2 and he already knows what to do and not do around me, because he knows some things set me off. I would never hurt my child by any means, but I never thought when I was pregnant that I would ever raise my voice to him or yell at him. I have an awesome child. The best child I could ever ask for. He very rarely cried as a baby. Broke himself from the bottle, pretty much potty trained himself, never fights when he needs medicine and the list goes on. Why am I so impatient some times?

 

Some people think I am so good with kids. I come up with fun things for them to do. I love children, spending time with them, watching them learn and develop and grow. But then I have my days where I don't have the patient to even HEAR anyone talk.

 

I know I haven't always been this angry, but I can't figure out where it started. I have talked to numerous counselors, professionals, from elementary, to middle school, to high school and even after I had my son. No one seems to be much of a help. They all seem to be clueless. What should I do? Should I contact the show? I just don't want to seem needy or like I'm wanting a free ride. I don't like asking for help, but after watching todays' show, I think if not for me, I need to do this for my family. The last thing I want is to loose Michael (my fiance') or Ethan (our son) to turn out like me, because of the way he was raised.

 

HELP!!!

 

xoxo,

Yvonne

Research sugar sensitivity on the internet. There radiant recovery is a great place to go and you will find me there. It's free, I'm not trying to sell you anything. I just know what you are going through because I am the same way and this is the answer.

 

There is a way out. You are not crazy. It is biochemical and is simple (although not easy) to fix. You don't have to invest a ton of money or seek years of counseling. When a problem is biochemical, you fix it on a physical level.

 

Trust me, when you start to learn about sugar sensitivity,  you will have many lightbulb moments.

 

I wish peace for you! Healing from sugar sensitivity is the greatest gift I've ever given myself and those I love!

 

Casey

 
August 2, 2007, 5:53 pm CDT

I Have Been There For Sure

I am a professional person, in my 40s.  I developed Bipolar in my 20's and had awful, terrible rage episodes.  More recently, I have tried to go off my meds a few times.  Each time it was so bizarre.  Even though I tapered them slowly, very slowly, still, I would end up with a hair trigger.  Very little at all would cause me to obsess, to get rageful, just to be out of control.  Once I used all the willpower I could muster for about a year and a half and tried and tried to control these rages.  No good.  It was hopeless.  Then I got back on my meds., mosty Lithium and an SSRI, and then, it was EASY to control my anger.  No more rages, it is easy.  No willpower needed.  For me, it is truly biochemical.  When I am not on meds, I am definitely "NOT ME" with all the rage and obsessiveness and irritability.  When I am on meds, I am myself.  Calm, a professional, etc.  I have wished it weren't biochemical, that I could control it, but no luck. 

Mags

 
August 2, 2007, 7:34 pm CDT

08/02 Explosive Anger and Its Aftermath

  I feel like the show was done on my life. Everything these people said was out of my own life. I coudn't believe I'm not the only one, & I'm not really going crazy(yet). I know it's not normal but at least I'm not alone.
 
August 2, 2007, 7:36 pm CDT

08/02 Explosive Anger and Its Aftermath

I am the female Bob I seen this today and I cried, well sobbed, this is me, I think I have always been "that" girl but recently do to increased stress, it is so profound and I am so miserable. I am an emotional mess, I cry often, more often then ever and then I am fine and it seems to constantly repeat its self over and over I can't seem to get a handle on things. I recently quit smoking, I have moved to another state with my husband who is in the army, and I recently started another job where trying to get to know people and be sweet and friendly truly makes me want to vomit and I barely have the engery, I am in my own personel hell.

 
August 2, 2007, 8:00 pm CDT

08/02 Explosive Anger and Its Aftermath

Quote From: deanna1954

My mother has this problem.  She has always had a terrible temper, but this last year, she has become uncontrollable.  She screams and swears and says such horrible things.  My brothers and I have stopped all communications with her.  When she does contact one of my brothers, it is to scream and carry on.  She says everyone has driven her to be this way, and this is her right.  She blames everyone else for her problems, and says she wishes she had never had children.  Well, her children are ages 52, 48, and 42.  We have tried everything we can think of besides committing her and are at our wits end.  It has been almost 12 months since I have had any contact with her, and I am so thankful, as she is so toxic to me that I finally had to stand my ground.  I am hoping to one day to know maybe she can be better and at least be civil to family.  Our family has had alot of tragedies, and she has driven all the rest of the family away. No one will take her calls anymore, because she has abused every family member.  What a travesty!!  I guess I don't  understand how someone can be so angry all the time at SO many people.  So sad. 
I am a nurse and her sudden onset of anger at her age can mean medical problems.  I know that you are not on speaking terms with her but she should be evaluated for Alzheimer's, depression, and other medical conditions.  That could be the problem.  I hope that you and your family can work things out.  Good luck.
 
First | Prev | 19 | 20 | 21 | 22 | 23 | 24 | 25 | 26 | Next | Last