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Topic : 04/27 Obsessive Love: The Drama Continues

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Created on : Friday, April 20, 2007, 02:40:41 pm
Author : DrPhilBoard1
Jeffrey and Jennifer's shocking and complicated story continues. During their 11-year marriage, Jeffrey has become so obsessed with Jennifer, he watches her every move. He has installed a GPS system in her car, taps her phone conversations, takes inappropriate pictures of her and watches her while she sleeps. Dr. Phil probes deep into Jeffrey's mind to find out why he acts the way he does. Is there any boundary Jeffrey won't cross when it comes to controlling his wife? Then, how are Jennifer and Jeffrey's three children being affected by the madness in the house? Their eldest child has been an eyewitness to his father's schemes. And, while Dr. Phil speaks one on one with Jennifer, Jeffrey has a total meltdown backstage, becoming physically ill. When Dr. Phil confronts him about his anxieties and offers a solution, will Jeffrey choose to make a change? Don’t miss the second part of this dramatic and emotional story, and find out if this family is on the path to healing or headed to divorce court.  Join the discussion.

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chachamom
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April 27, 2007, 10:36 pm PDT

04/27 Obsessive Love: The Drama Continues

Quote From: mour79

     If his behavior was "way over the top" wouldn't her actions have contributed?  He wasn't this bad until she comitted adultery.  He (Dr. Phil) should have made her own up to her portion of the dysfunction.  Albeit he is in my opinion a psychopath, she is in no way without blame.  If the focus of this show was him, are they going to focus on the cheater he's married to next week?

There was no marriage.  He married a woman 10 years younger because he wanted to control her.  DP doesn't beat people over the head with their mistakes unless they don't accept them.   She has accepted responsibility for that so you all need to move on...
 
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christyj42
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April 27, 2007, 10:36 pm PDT

GET OUT WHILE YOU CAN

 I know she agreed to not make a decision regarding divorce or leaving him while he is away getting help but I think she should get the hell out while he is gone and she should go as far away as possible and leave no forwarding address.  If she decides to leave him after he gets out, I wouldn't put anything past him.  He could hurt her or their kids.  He has got some real issues.  He seems to make excuses for his behavior.  He doesn't take real responsibility for what he has done. 
 
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theresao
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April 27, 2007, 10:36 pm PDT

04/27 Obsessive Love: The Drama Continues

Quote From: livinia

What stood out to me on this show was the discussion about anxiety. While they didn't talk about it in depth, they touched upon some of the results and aspects of anxiety that can cause a person to emotionally harm themselves. I was diagnosed with general underlining anxiety a little over a year ago but it is something I have been living with since young childhood. I have still not gotten over this problem and it has held me back in my life because I have not been sucessful at overcoming it. While I do not have the obsessive aspect, I do have the fear and this fear is crippling. It makes me glad that this is a topic that has finally been talked about on the show because until this point I have not seen an episode that delt with anxiety. I hope that the next stage will be to focus on people suffering from anxiety alone that is not in combiniation with obsession. I know that there are a lot of people out there like me but it would still be nice to know that there is someone who has found hope and a way out. Someone who is able to get past the anxiety and live their life. I have never met anyone who suffers from anxiety like I do let alone someone who has overcome it and it would be nice to get this topic out and into discussions.

I agree, I have suffered with anxiety and panic attacks for fifteen years withour obsessions.  It is miserable at different times.  I have never seen an episode just on anxiety attacks and how crippling it is.  I am a 46 year old professional woman and a mother of four and it is very difficult at times.  The more I understand the symptoms and their causes the better I deal with it
 
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chachamom
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April 27, 2007, 10:39 pm PDT

04/27 Obsessive Love: The Drama Continues

Quote From: ak_karen

Yes, it is his last chance to proove that he loves her.  Lot's of people change when they are ready and maybe this is his time.  They could end up being the happiest couple ever.  The family deserves 1 more chance.

He doesn't love her.  He wants to control her.  He ran out of "chances" ages ago.  This was her opporutnity to seek help and get away from  him.  There is no hope for this marriage.  A partner and their trust and love must be earned.  He lost that years ago.
 
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siempre2
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April 27, 2007, 10:40 pm PDT

Hopefully for Jeff and Jennifer

I just want to say that I wished that I was able to see yesterday show. I had totally forgot about this being a two-part session. When the show started it gave us audience an up-date on what was shown yesterday which definitely helped me to know where the show was picking up. My first reaction was anger with Jeff, then as Dr. Phil was talking with both of them it came pretty cleared that Jeff was a man who truly needed help big time. I am hopeful that he will finish the program Dr. Phil has offered him. Jeff better complete the program if he wants his wife, Jennifer to give him another chance. Jeff has a beautiful family that deserves to have a lovely dad & especially husband. Myself I don't know if I would have stuck it out as much as Jennifer, she is one passionate woman, kudos to her! Dr. Phil, I appreciate the final comment you said after the show because you already know how we viewers can log on to the message board and tell it like it is. So my final word to Jeff is, " PLEASE JEFF DO EXACTLY WHAT NEEDS TO BE DONE AND STAY UNTIL YOU DEFINITELY KNOW THAT YOU CURE FROM THIS OBSESSION YOU HAVE ABOUT YOUR WIFE."  I do believe everybody deserves a SECOND CHANCE SO DON'T BLOW CAUSE IF YOU DO - YOU ARE GOING TO BE ONE LONELY MAN WITHOUT YOUR FAMILY, PLUS YOUR KIDS AND FAMILY WILL ALSO NEED

PROFESSIONAL ASSISTANCES TO COPE WHAT HAS HAPPEN SINCE COMING ON DR. PHIL'S SHOW.  GOOD LUCK!
 
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christyj42
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April 27, 2007, 10:41 pm PDT

04/27 Obsessive Love: The Drama Continues

Quote From: lubsdacubs

Okay, #1  Did this woman's husband not find her in bed with another man and beat the crap out of him, only for the husband to get a bad rap as "violent"?  Any man with honor and love for his wife would do the same thing.  Second, why did she marry him.  I see she has her own tanning bed.  Maybe the money?  I understand she's afraid to leave because he's loco and might do something even more extreme, but to wonder what she will do for money?  Also, what the heck is she doing talking to a man on the phone she met at the bar and having a myspace page with naked fairies and no pictures of her husband ( oh yeah, a little caption that says she's married).  Why was all this glossed over like it was okay?  My husband would have made me choose to be a married woman or to go live my separate life of fun had I done all this to him.  Yes, her husband needs mucho mucho help, but why is everyone painting this woman as an innocent angel?  Plus he said "we" show her pictures to people we know.  And she didn't deny it.  So she's in on flaunting her sexuality/body.  I just don't think this is one-sided.  He's overboard but she's not trying to put out the fire by keeping a stinking myspace page.  If that bugged my husband that much I would get rid of the page because I love my husband that much.  It's called "priorities".  And don't be asking for picture's of people's butts on the internet especially if you KNOW your husband would find out.  Why would you do that anyway?  That's disrespectful to your marriage and your family.  Like Doc Phil says "those who have nothing to hide, hide nothing".  My husband could track me all he wanted to and would never have a reason to be upset with me because I love and respect him so much I would never do anything to ever give him a reason to doubt me.  This story is more two-sided than presented and the woman should think about earning back her husband's trust.  Especially after being busted for having an affair. 
 I agree with you in alot of ways.  I didn't really understand why she had the 'My Space' and why she was doing some of those things.  Maybe it was her way of rebelling towards him.  He is definitely sick but it seems like she taunts him too.  All I have to say is 'Those poor kids!!!'
 
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chachamom
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April 27, 2007, 10:42 pm PDT

04/27 Obsessive Love: The Drama Continues

Quote From: dianeja

   

    Sometimes I wish that was the problem but here is my problem: My husband and I have been married for almost 21 years. During that time he has taken money from a worker/friend to see me coming out of the shower with no clothes on. He has set up a threesome with another coworker from the next job that he went to. I told him that I wasn't interested but he picked out linguree for me to wear that night. We have four kids ages 15,17,19 and 21. Now of course the 21 year old is very seldom here but he is always with the 19 year old working he says. He doesn't sleep with me we have no llife together at all. Which is worse too much or None at all............

So what is your point?  Are you going to whine or do something about it?  You teach people how to treat you.
 
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xhadtemper
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April 27, 2007, 10:59 pm PDT

I don't understand

Quote From: aj30265

If your or anyone you know are in a bad relationship, either fix it or end it.....no one should be "held captive" and we are all responsible for the commitments we make.  When anyone gets married they are committing to the covenents of their spouse and family, and if they break those covenants, then they deal with the consequences.  If anyone is can't deal with that commitment, then divorce and cheating won't be an issue.  You can sleep with whomever,  post website pictures or do whatever, but do it after you have ended the covenant entered into in your marriage.....
I am sorry but I didn't understand what this post had to do with mine. I ended my marriage and I never cheated on him.
 
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priceless23
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April 27, 2007, 11:00 pm PDT

what a mess

I think this whole thing is scarey. I understand why you sent him away. But if his wife does get back with him I think she might have a problem. Some women like a man like that. It makes them feel wanted. She was hugging him at the end of the show it ws crazy. If someone locked me in the closet I would have taken your offer up in a second and moved to an apartment  when he was in the looney bin.
 
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sunshine7000
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April 27, 2007, 11:02 pm PDT

Dr. Phil You Got Snowed

Those were crocodile tears cried by all abusers  You gave him just what he wanted.  You got her to stay with him.  Do you really believe that he deserves another chance because he is not an "evi"l person, he has just done evil things.  So if he kills her and his kids and then himself, is he better because he is a nice guy?  His poor wife was painted into a corner on your stage, delay her own life for even longer until he gets some help.  How could she say no?  Some women could have, but then those women don't stay in abusive relationships for 11 years.  The only good thing that came out of this is getting him out of the house long enough for her to pack up and leave (hopefully that is the real plan).  That woman and her children are in grave danger.  I hope you can help her get to a new place where she can restart her life, without him.  I know that two parents are usually better than one.  I don't believe in summarily dismissing a father, but he has had enough chances.  I do not want to read about the death of this family on the news.
 
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