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Topic : 08/24 The Dr. Phil House: “Make My Kid a Star,” Part 3

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Created on : Friday, May 18, 2007, 12:42:02 pm
Author : DrPhilBoard1
(Original Air Date: 05/21/07) Dr. Phil’s child star competition heats up! Seven kids with stars in their eyes face the final leg of the competition in The Dr. Phil House, but do their mothers unwittingly sabotage their chances? After speaking with Veronica, Kiki and Larissa about how they could be a liability to their child’s success, Dr. Phil turns to Kim and Susan. Playing a video clip of Kim’s daughter, Alaina, in an interview, Dr. Phil points out the pressure and stress that she feels and how it may affect her performance in school. Then, Dr. Phil shows a video of Susan assisting her daughter, Meagan, during the dance rehearsals. In the video, Meagan struggles under her demands. Will these mothers adjust their behavior and take on a healthy, supportive role in their child’s career? Then, it’s time for the final talent show! Each child performs on the Dr. Phil stage, in front of his studio audience and a panel of Hollywood’s top talent agents, managers and casting directors, who decide the grand-prize winner. The children receive fabulous prizes for their hard work, but they mean little to one upset mother. Share your thoughts, join the discussion.

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May 20, 2007, 6:06 pm CDT

Hmmm

 Well I thought that these moms' are too hard on their children, i feel like the girls' are losing interest because of ADDED pressure. its not fair. Julie Angel of Light. HA
 
May 20, 2007, 6:48 pm CDT

unfair

I think we are being unfair to these mothers, we only seen a small part of their lives and we are judging them . I for one am sorry ,but what we can only judge by what we saw. I know these Mothers love their children just like I love my girls. They would most likely say the same thing about us if they seen us yelling at our child. Am I right Lady's? Susan I hope this helps you feel better I know you did not want to come across as a very mean Mother. Thank -you for the E-Mail you sent it helped me, see how things can look one why ,when you are not realy seeing what you think you are seeing. I pray all your Kids have a very happy life doing what they love most.

 Love HaHa The Clown

 
May 20, 2007, 8:17 pm CDT

God had mercy thanks to your request

Quote From: nicolassnana

I hope GOD has mercy on these children, the mothers DO NOT.

To me this is just another form of child abuse.

SO where are social services, the dads, grandparents or even a teacher, or school counselor?

I hope these kids get help soon.

Thanks for asking God to help our kids - they just got cast in a film! Keep up the good work.
 
May 21, 2007, 12:21 am CDT

Young Contestants

Quote From: horselightning

Reading the discription or was it the commercal for this episode there is to be a not so happy mom? Shall we guess which  one that will be? hmmmm...
     I think out of all of them it is Gracie, but I really think that these kids need to get back to school and reality. There are millions out there that their moms think they are great but it is only hurting the kids each time they fail to win. The loud mouth mom needs a life other than trying to run her daughters. She is a disgrace and I pity the producer that would attempt to work with that child under her mom. They have enough still to go through without the parents telling them they are losers in life at age 12 or younger. I feel for th little girl that said "It is me they laugh at" I want to tell all of them it is the parents that we laugh at and get angry at not the kids. Be Kids, go to school and pick a great profession, one that will last a lifetime not 15 minutes. Get a grip Moms.     
 
May 21, 2007, 12:27 am CDT

"Baseball is NOT Life"

 

I just want to say from experience that parents are way too pushy with their kids when it comes to "making them a star".  We had an experience with one of our sons who at a very young age was a phenonemal baseball player.  Upmires would come up to him after games and talk to him.  He was always small until about the 11th grade, but beginning at age 8, he started playing with older kids, and not "sissy" little league (I'm not calling little league "sissy", that is what the "SELECT" baseball coaches called it.  Well, we got sucked into this fast paced world of "SELECT" baseball, and my son even won a World Series at the age of 10, and then came in second place at another world series at age 13.  BUT, it was not worth it.  Not only were we shelling out money we didn't have, and always out soliciting sponsorships, but our son was EXPECTED to make phenonemal plays.  The "great" plays were not enough!  I remember watching other players' parents on the bleachers sitting there hoping their son didn't make ONE mistake, and if they did, everyone in the bleachers on both sides could hear the parent angrily yelling at their kid.  (that is just stupid).  And our children know, they know if we are not happy with their performance.  Beginning at very young ages, our kids just want to please us.  Our son still plays ball a lot and he enjoys it.  He can pitch 90 miles an hour, BUT he doesn't.  In high school, he said he missed "PLAYING" baseball.  It wasn't "fun" anymore.  If he played a "perfect" game, there was always something else he should have done better.  And also, our kids were expected to take "private lessons" if they were in select baseball.  I know of parents that paid hundreds of dollars "EVERY" week.  I take full responsibility for my part (being too pushy and always telling my son how to be better).  Some of the parents on our team had horrible attitudes.  I stopped buying my son the "Baseball is Life" t-shirts, because it is NOT.  I remember one of the first tournaments that we had "boy pitch".  My son pitched the first three innings (that was the maximun at his age, and then his good friend came in and pitched the last three innings.  We were leading 5-3 in the last inning with two outs.  The other team had 2 runners on base, and their #9 hitter (this tiny little kid) came up to the plate and hit his first home run and we got beat 6-5.  My son ran up to his father and I and said, "mom and dad, can I have "2" hotdogs????  But most of the other boys AND THEIR PARENTS were crying!!!  If we would have won, we would have gotten to travel and play in a "real tournament".    My point is (and by the way, the boy that was pitching and gave up the winning homerun,   he cried and was upset for a long time an  blamed  himself for the loss.  He now is playing for the Astros and played with them at Spring Training in Kissimmee this past Spring) and so like I said my point is that we all need to "calm down" and let our kids have fun. I remember very specifically in one tournament when we were ahead by one run, and the other team had the bases loaded with "NO" outs.  They brought in my son to pitch.  He had a huge grin on his face as he struck out the side and we won the game!  And it was because he was having fun, and had the confidence, and was just "playing" baseball.   I was probably one of the worst parents, always wanting my son to do better, while in fact he was "SO" good, and I never slowed down and shared with him more positive than negative comments.  Eventually, the stress caught up to him.  The huge smile that was always on his face had been replaced with stomache aches before games.   When our children make mistakes (in ball games, or in gymnastics, or whatever they do) don't you know that they aleady know it?????   What they really need is an icecream from TCBY instead of more private lessons.    I wish we could go back and start over again, and not have let so much pressure be put on our son.  I remember the morning when the coach called and told us that some of the parents had a problem with our son "always" having to leave for church.  (We go to church 2 hours on Sunday morning and 1 hour Sunday night, and then 1  hour on Wednesday night).   The coach said he personally did not have a problem, but several of the parents did.  I gladly told him that he had just helped me and my husband make a decision that we had been struggling with WAY TOO LONG.  Our reply was, then our son can't play with yall, but thanks for everything.  My son is now  21 and when he goes and plays ball, he is really fun to watch.  He'll catch a fly ball in centerfield bare handed, or climb the fence and rob someone of a homerun, or throw someone out from centerfield that is trying to tag up and score.  After the games, there are always guys that come up to him and ask him if he ever played pro ball.  He just smiles and says "no".  I'm just happy that he is having fun ---- something that we should have made sure happened many years ago.  SO for you parents that are just starting out, PLEASE HEAR ME, don't fall into the same thing we did.  It is NOT worth it to your child or your relationship with your child.  Let you kid have fun, because one day some stupid game won't even matter.   But how you loved your kid will!   And by making your child be subject to angry, degrading, & cussing coaches is not at all appropriate or okay!   Good Luck, and I'm happy if just ONE person listens. 

 
May 21, 2007, 4:46 am CDT

Make my kid a nervous wreck!

that's my take on this....

 

After watching these shows I can't believe someone from their local Department of Children and Families isn't involved.  These children are being verbally abused and if these parents aren't stopped *now* these kids will be in therapy for the rest of their lives.  The audacity of these parents.  They are not solving anything nor are they motivating their children.  They are demeaning them every time they open their mouths.  Someone help these parents to understand this it *not* the way to make winners out of their kids.

 
May 21, 2007, 5:08 am CDT

05/21 The Dr. Phil House: “Make My Kid a Star,” Part 3

Quote From: lind24

 TO ALL OF THESE OBSESSED PARENTS:

 

  PLEASE, SOMETIME SOON, LOSE WEIGHT, BUY A NEW SPORTSCAR,

  MAYBE GET A CHEMICAL PEEL, FACELIFT OR EVEN NEW WARDROBE.

 

DO WHATEVER IT IS THAT MAKES YOU! HAPPY- JUST STOP PUSHING PRESSURE

ON THESE CHILDREN... 

I love YOUR non abusive and non harsh words 

I am sure you must have a perfect body, peachy cream complexion, and are the epitome of the latest styles.

Please let us know when YOUR parenting guide comes out.  Because, you are obviously an expert in child rearing and have perfect kids!

 

You are certainly blessed!

 
May 21, 2007, 7:17 am CDT

Make My Kid A Star

I think the boys are the most talented. They were really good. The girl that sang America was my second choice. She has a powerful and wonderful sounding voice.
 
May 21, 2007, 7:27 am CDT

I agree

Quote From: puck99

Whatever else may be true, if a number of kids hadn't been interested in careers in the performing arts (that includes music as well as acting), there wouldn't have been any kids on the show, because no one would have submitted. And you'd have nothing to react to, because there would have been no show. Be aware that the Dr. Phil show tells some but not ALL of the story. We watched every mom behave quite rationally and supportively towards their kids most of the time. But we also recognise that when you try to achieve something in any field, there's higher stress. Can't be helped. As for pressure on the kids.....if all of them didn't want to be doing what they're doing, they certainly never would have made it on the show.

As for the parents.......all of the negative parental motives mentioned may be present in some degree, but not necessarily. The moment you recognize that what's happening on the show is KID-DRIVEN, then you have to think how you would help your child do what they want, given your circumstances.
Y'know, it wasn't until you mentioned stress that I understood a little more why people can be irrational and act the way they do under preasure. That being said, it is still no reason, whatsoever, to take that stress out on your child. That, also, being said, this isn't just a 'celebrity' thing. How many of us have heard stories, or have been involved in pleasing our parents in other aspects? It isn't just creative talent, parents can be too pushy and take that out on their kids in regards to sports (they should have a show about pushy coaches... some of what I saw at my brother in laws soccor game a few years ago could've made these mothers look like angels), but what about academic achievement? We all think that academics is important (which it is), but what about the parents that push the kids into doing advanced classes and extra workloads and an "A" average and if the child doesn't meet the parents expectaion as oppossed to the child's ability the parent punishes that child? I mean, it's great if your child is naturally talented, athletic, or intelligent, but some parents go too far in areas other than being 'stage moms'. And in some cases, it ISN'T for the benefit of the child. They are negative and pushy and maybe even living through their child. A parent wants their child to be a doctor and pushes them to that, while the child wants to be an artist or something. I just think that parents can be pushy and trying to live through their children and have too high expectations in areas other than the preforming arts and I'd love for Dr. Phil to do more shows on that as opposed to stage moms all the time. On a side note, if it truly is what your child wants... great, but keep them grounded, don't grind them.
 
May 21, 2007, 7:43 am CDT

amen

Quote From: tooniceinmaine

I am a mother of 3 teenagers and take it from me, it doesn't work when you try to live vicariously through your children. The majority of these parents need lives outside of their "litle stars." Whatever will these mothers do when the kids are grown and gone? Who will they focus on then? Maybe some need to focus on the husbands and families that they have. I feel that all the children on the show are very beautiful and talented and look forward to the finale.
When you said "the majority of these parents need lives outside of their "little stars"", I not only agreed, but it made me think of their other children. I mean, you said you have three teenagers and I am sure you love them all equally, any good parent of multiple children does (I have three as well, but they are considerably younger!) but (point time) in other Dr. Phil shows, I've noticed that parents of multiple children who have one creatively talented child (this can be true of any talent, but for all intesive purposes we'll say creative ability) and the parents will focus so much on that ONE child as opposed to all their children individually. I agree it's tough to try and make "special" time for all three seperately, but when you are so focused on one child, other children feel the impact of that. They maybe even think lower of themselves because "what if I was prettier like my sister" or "what if I were smarter like my brother" or a number of things. "Then maybe mom and dad would love me too." I wonder if any of these moms have other children and how this affects them. Remeber that other Dr. Phil show were there was a young girl who could sing and act and her brother and sister were working for her? Sure, the parents tried to include them, but did they ever feel left out? Sorry for my tanget, I am just thinking (especially if there are more than just this 'little star' on t.v.) if the parents focusing on this particular child's career is affecting anyone else in the family. JMO.
 
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