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Topic : Bipolar Disorder

Number of Replies: 6639
New Messages This Week: 0
Last Reply On:
Created on : Thursday, July 07, 2005, 08:57:16 am
Author : dataimport

Patients suffering from Bipolar disorder face many difficult challenges. Share your story and get support from those who understand.

 

If you believe you need immediate assistance, please call your local emergency number or crisis hotline listed in your local phone book's government pages. You can also find more help on our General and Mental Health Resources page


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July 22, 2005, 7:04 pm CDT

Storm!!!!!!!!

I came back to say hello!  I hope things are going well with you. 

 
July 22, 2005, 7:45 pm CDT

HEY HEY HEY!!

Not sure about this... BUT wanted to say welcome back and WOOHOO... I was having withdrawls ;)

Hopefully tomorrow will be busy and we can all get to know each other again.

For now I think we need to re-do our BIO's like EM asked us to do a while back...

 

MINE:

Tammy, 31 mom of 2

14 yr old daughter, Emily bp, ptsd, gad. Is ok but wondering if she is cycling into depression, she is having a lot of psychotic symptoms or just not use to being alone. We will call pdoc monday and ask.

 

3 yr old daughter, Logan, who is normal but today was going 100 miles a minute. She scares me because I over annalyze everything she does.

 

My hubby is wonderful works all the time so I don't :)

 

My bestfriends are theones I have made here.

Love ya'll

Talk tomorrow

Lots of hugs and love TaM

 
July 22, 2005, 7:57 pm CDT

Just sayiing hi to everyone

Hi everyone. I hope everything is going well. Hopefully we can catch up soon on everyone. I cant really understand the board but maybe I will later....Brooke
 
July 22, 2005, 8:37 pm CDT

This is too weird

Mabye, its just because my brain has been working overtime it seems. For school, that is. I've been okay with the Bipolar but my blood pressure has been monitored for a month and today, my doc put me on a high blood pressure pill. Great....just what I need .....another pill. That's gonna make me pee more. Thank goodness, my classes are at night.

 

I can't do my bio tonight......i've got to go relax. I have been going going going, every day.

 

Jen

 
July 22, 2005, 9:00 pm CDT

the dr phil letter

ok i know i have already asked but i am trying to get a few more so pleeeeease guys send them in i

 

Dear Dr. Phil,

 

You have a wonderful forum to reach out and educate people.  Your knowledge and compassion has indeed helped many.  Bravo for your good work.  The message boards that have been created on your web site have also touched many people.   In fact I am one of several that suffer from bipolar disorder and have found comfort and support through the bipolar board.  The intent of this letter is to share our stories and to encourage you once again to produce as show on bipolar.  One of the many common threads that you will read is the fact that it’s difficult to deal with the disorder when so many people simply don’t understand.  Please help us to share the message of hope to all that struggle.  Here are some of our stories:

 

 

 

it can be anything from a few lines to a page and anything in between

your name and address or just a sign in name or nothing at all its your choice

 

 please the more the better

 

and to all those who already have thankyou!!!!!!

 
July 22, 2005, 9:04 pm CDT

dr phil letter

sorry my email address is

 

mwebstar@hotmail.com

 
July 23, 2005, 1:29 am CDT

Hey all

Hey there everyone. Glad the board is finally back. I've really been missing it, and going through withdrawals. Been missing talking to all of you. My last week has been a week from hell. My roommate went to Sudbury saying she was driving a transport down there to drop off a load, and coming back with hay. The boys were supposed to be staying with her ex and had already been there a couple of days. Well the day she left (Sunday) I get a call from him saying she was supposed to get them yesterday (Sat) and if I don't come get them he's calling CAS. I ended up going to get them even though I had little money, gas or food. First couple of days were o.k. Then food was really low, boys less helpful and mom didn't come back Wed like she was supposed to. The one son took off once 1 day and twice the next day. Police were involved, CAS called and kids taken into custody even though mom was coming home tonight. They told CAS about being pushed down the stairs and hit. Luckily I've talked to the mother, hay is supposed to come tomorrow morning, she doesn't blame me for anything (I'm not the one who called CAS and it's been made clear to her by others). There's also talk that she may be moving to Sudbury, but she says no. I really don't know what the heck is going on anymore. There's other B.S. going on too as in I've heard threats from both sides towards the other - not directly to the other but being told what they plan to do to the other. On top of this, I'm completely out of my meds now, and am also sick. Went to the hospital today. Not sure but probably bronchitis. Just know my throat hurts like ****, entire body hurts especially neck shoulders and hips, chest is tight, ear cannals sore and running a fever. They gave me a couple of antibiotics and a script.

I am very happy that the board is back (although it's going to take some getting used to) and glad to be able to talk to you all again.

 
July 23, 2005, 2:15 am CDT

son with schizophrenia

  

As of this 22nd day of July 2005, I feel like I am living in tormented hell.  My son just celebrated his 20th birthday and has been suffering with a mentall illness since a diagnosis in October 2004.  In October, I received a phone call that my son was at his deceased grandmother’s house, and my son was very incoherent and threatening suicide. Her house is located in Alabama, I live in Georgia. I knew that I would not be able to handle my son since he is 6’2 and 275 lbs. My husband and brother went to him to try to calm him down.  I went to find an Alabama Judge to get committal papers since I didn’t know what else to do to try to save him.  The judge sent two deputies with me to rescue my son.  The deputies transported my son to an outpatient mental clinic in Alabama. 

  

The Alabama mental health clinic believed that my son was on drugs so they recommended that I send him to a rehabilitation clinic in Montgomery, Alabama.  Unfortunately, they were not able to take him until the following morning.  The Alabama outpatient clinic sent him home with me and my brother. 

 

 

The later in the day it became, the more my son exhibited bizarre and erratic behavior.  He was out of control.  He was hallucinating and talking out of his head about the devil and hell.  He even put his hand around my neck because he thought he saw foam spewing from my mouth. It scared me because I thought he was going to choke me.  I called the rehabilitation after-hours clinic many times to ask for advice but to no avail. Frantically, I called for other family members to come and help.  There were five family members trying to handle him.   Eventually, he walked out of the house and started knocking on my neighbor’s doors in the middle of the night and walking up and down the road with all of us in tow trying to get him to return to the house. Reluctantly, I had to call 911 for his safety and everyone else’s safety. 

 

 

It was difficult to convince the sheriff’s department in Georgia to do anything because they refused to recognize the legal papers from the Alabama judge.  Eventually, my son started acting bizarre again.  It was then that the deputies decided to take him to the emergency room for me.  My son was so out of control that it took five grown men to subdue him to give him sedation.  It was distressing for to me to watch them have to subdue him.  It broke my heart.

 

 

My son received a four-week treatment at a mental health hospital October – November 2004.    Bipolar manic/depressive disorder was the diagnosis given by the doctor.

 

 

When my son was released from the hospital, I brought him home with me, against my husband’s wishes.  The plan was for him to work with my husband part-time and go to a secondary school part-time to learn a trade.  He was very bitter to me because I had put him in the mental hospital. He treated me with disrespect and rudeness.  This plagued my husband even more. The four months that my son lived with us caused tremendous strain on my marriage.  But, I begged my husband to just bear with it for me. I felt I had to help my son in every way I could.  I had to have peace within myself so that I could lay my head down at night knowing that I did my very best.  Then on March 18, 2005, he just left without saying anything to me or my husband.  I was able to locate his girlfriend but she was very aloof. At that point, I decided to try to let go of "mother-henning" him.  However, on several occasions I tried to reach my son to see how he was doing, but he refused to return my calls. 

 

 

On May 7, 2005, at 9:15 a.m., I received a phone call from his cousin and aunt from his paternal side of the family which also lives in Alabama. They told me that my son was there at their house and was out of his mind.  He told them that he had killed his girlfriend and she was under the steps at his trailer. I asked them to please go and check and call me back as soon as possible. I was paralyzed with fear. His cousin did call back within about 30 minutes and informed me the girlfriend was okay.  They also informed me that my son was still at their house still acting bizarre.  I told them that if they couldn’t handle him that I certainly couldn’t.  I asked them to call the sheriff; I thought that if he was on drugs that he would dry out in a day or so. The next thing I knew was his cousin was putting him out in my driveway which was about an hour later.  I knew once I saw him that I was in for a rough ride.

 

 

We were having my husband’s birthday party that day with about 12 guests attending.  Everyone observed my son’s erratic behavior. I kept trying to encourage my son to take a shower and just try to take a nap. He refused or could not comprehend anything being said to him.  Reluctantly, each of my guests tried to calmly talk him into to eating or taking a nap.  Fortunately, everyone remained very calm, but we were very uneasy because we anticipated that this was a very volatile situation. 

 

 

Finally, he was persuaded to eat a bite or two of food coming off the grill. Then for no appearant reason he became very agitated.  He started talking about suicide and talking out of his mind.  It quickly became a very frightening situation.  Shockingly, the next thing he did was take a steak knife and start cutting on himself, up and down his chest, caressing the knife and talking to the knife.  Everyone became panic-stricken because we didn’t know what his next move would be.  We tried to convince him to give someone the knife, but that only made him more infuriated.  He commenced to get into my in-ground swimming pool with the knife while simultaneously ranting and raving at everyone.  At this point, I told him that if he didn’t give me the knife and get out of the swimming pool that I would be forced to call 911.  He just yelled for me to go ahead.  He wasn’t scared.  I begged him not to make me call the police.  I had no other choice.  I made the call to 911 and told them to please send an officer that my son had a knife and had been threatening suicide.  They advised me that help was on the way.

 

 

I went to the front yard to wait for the officers to arrive. While I was waiting, I heard a lot of commotion going on in the pool area.  I ran to back yard to discover that my husband was now in the pool with my son and he was irate. My son had taken the knife and started puncturing the vinyl in the bottom of the pool. He had punctured about 25 or 30 holes in the bottom of the pool.  My husband was trying to stop him then my son turned and slashed the side of the pool.  My husband’s anger quickly escalated out of control; especially, since he and I just put this swimming pool in last year with the majority of the work done by ourselves.   My husband picked up a wooden stick from the side of the flower bed to defend his self while simultaneously forcing my son up the steps and out of the pool.  I was running toward them as fast as I could so I could try to intervene and keep my husband or my son from getting hurt or worse.  I had never seen my husband so angry.  Moreover, I knew in my gut that if my husband were to have stricken him with the wooden stick, it would have intensified the situation with someone receiving an injury or worse. 

 

 

Without hesitation, I jumped in between my husband and my son while begging them to please stop.  At that instant, my son grabbed me by my neck and held the knife to me. My husband and friends were terrified that my son was going to kill me.  Everyone was pleading with my son not to hurt me. My son dragged me to the back door of the house. I was pleading with him not to hurt me. I kept asking him why, but he never responded.  I kept telling him how much I loved him, but as I looked into his eyes, I realized that there was nobody there.  He just had a blank and evil stare.  During all of this chaos, my friends had already called 911 again.  They expressed to 911 that the situation had become a matter or life or death for me.  As my son tried to pull me into the house, I told him that if he was going to kill me that he would do it with everyone watching. I was terrified and feared for my life. Suddenly, a rush of adrenaline overcame me which allowed me to escape from his grasp.  My son then barricaded himself in the house.

 

 

The sheriff’s department deputies were starting to arrive on the scene by this time.  There were at least eight deputies that had surrounded my house with their weapons drawn.  I could hear my son in the den talking to himself, but he refused to open the door for anyone.  I was frantic.  It felt as if I was in a nightmare and couldn’t wake up.  I was crying and begging the officers not to kill my baby.  I felt so powerless.  Fortunately, my husband found a spare key to the front door; this prevented the officers from breaking down my double glass doors.  Fully armed, the officers rushed the front door.  I could hear sounds of scuffling, and the officers yelling at him to get his hands behind his back and get down on the floor. 

 

 

The pain I felt in my soul was excruciating and unbearable.  Time was at a stand still. I was expecting the officers to bring him out the door in handcuffs. I was more shocked when the ambulance arrived.  I knew then that something was terribly wrong.  I was almost hysterical.  Subsequently one of the officers opened the door for the paramedics, affording the opportunity to force my way through the door to see what was happening with my son.  That image will haunt me for the rest of my life.  My son was lying on the floor in a huge puddle of blood.  He appeared to be dead.  I was traumatized and almost physically collapsed. 

 

 

One of the officers quickly approached me and informed me that they tazered him six times, with three of them being with a dry tazer. They elucidated that my son had stabbed himself in the chest and had almost bitten off his thumb completely.  The paramedics transported my son to the hospital and from there he went to jail.

 

 

This incident resulted in criminal charges against my son for aggravated assault and criminal damage to property.  My son remained in jail under a $30,000 bond for two months. During his tenure in jail, I visited weekly.  It anguished me to have to see my son in jail.

 

 

Many people ridiculed me and told me what a fool I was to go to the jail, most especially my husband.  My husband consistently forbade me to go, but I was compelled to go anyway. Even though my heart was crushed, I still wanted to reach out to help him. But my analytical thinking told me he must be accountable for his actions and suffer the consequences.  To this very day, my husband is still disconcerted by my son’s terrorist actions against me.  My husband says he will never forgive or forget the actions of my son that day.  I truly understand my husband's view point.  I know that my husband loves me and is only trying to protect me.

 

 

On July 7, 2005, I received a phone call from the jail stating that my son was in suicide watch.  I couldn’t take it any longer.  Against my husband’s wishes, I made bail for my son to await trial.  It was at that time, when I realized that my son was sicker than I had ever comprehended. 

 

 

On the same day that my son was released on bond, my family and I sought medical help from a local hospital as well as a psychiatrist from Atlanta. The doctor also stated that it had been in my son's best interest that I got him out of jail and sought medical treatment for him immediately.  The doctors quickly determined that my son was experiencing severe stages of schizophrenia that encompassed grossly disorganized thoughts, paranoia as well as displaying catatonic behavior. Thankfully, there were no drugs in his system.

 

 

My son is currently receiving medical attention at hospital for the mentally ill.  I don’t know how long he will be there.  The doctors informed me that he is at a great risk for suicide. Especially, when he is first released, and that he will need someone with him at all times until he stabilizes.  Additionally, to compound this whole horrific matter, I just discovered that he has a baby due October 8, 2005.  This is my first grandchild.

 

 

I humbly and respectfully addressed the district attorney with a request to dismiss criminal charges against my son contingent upon mandatory mental help for my son, so that he may have a chance at a prospering and productive life.  I don’t know what the outcome is at this juncture.

 

 

I would like some kind of advice of how to carry on with my own life.  I know my son is very sick.   Moreover, I am very scared of him when he is not in his right mind.  I am the first person that he lashes out against.  He believes that every time that he has come to me for help, I have had him constrained either by hospital or jail.  I only do this to protect him from his self and others in his path. I refuse to turn my back on him while he is sick, but I feel helpless because I don’t know what to do. 

 

 

As I mentioned, my husband is against anything that has to do with my son.  I reiterate that I do understand and respect my husband’s feelings which I have conveyed to him on numerous times. Nevertheless, my husband's verbal and mental abuse he inflicts upon me only magnifies the stress that I am enduring.  My husband threatens to leave me and refuses to put any money in the bank to pay bills.  He believes that this will ensure that none of his money will be spent on my son.

 

 

I love my husband, and I love my son with all of my heart and soul.  This is the most difficult position I have ever had to experience.  I am caught in the middle of this chaos between my husband and my son. This rips me apart, and makes me literally physically ill. If my son did this to himself by doing drugs, it would be much easier for me to step back, but that is not at all the case.  He is sick with this schizophrenia mental illness, and I just can’t turn my back on him.  I am his mother, and if he can’t count on me for help, who can he count on?

 

 

Please help.  My life is a disaster. I feel that I am on a railroad track watching the train come straight for me, but I can not get off the track.  I am under so much pressure that I know I am spiraling toward a disaster myself.  I have health problems myself, and I am concerned that all of this stress is going to make me have a meltdown or even possibly a heart attack.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 
July 23, 2005, 3:31 am CDT

THE LETTER

ok i know i have already asked but i am trying to get a few more so pleeeeease guys send them in i

Dear Dr. Phil,

You have a wonderful forum to reach out and educate people. Your knowledge and compassion has indeed helped many. Bravo for your good work. The message boards that have been created on your web site have also touched many people. In fact I am one of several that suffer from bipolar disorder and have found comfort and support through the bipolar board. The intent of this letter is to share our stories and to encourage you once again to produce as show on bipolar. One of the many common threads that you will read is the fact that it’s difficult to deal with the disorder when so many people simply don’t understand. Please help us to share the message of hope to all that struggle. Here are some of our stories:

it can be anything from a few lines to a page and anything in between

your name and address or just a sign in name or nothing at all its your choice

please the more the better

and to all those who already have thankyou!!!!!!

 i really have to write a letter for you.  man i keep forgetting.
Beka
 
July 23, 2005, 3:39 am CDT

rhammett

Wow you have been through quite an ordeal.  Have you e-mailed a copy of your letter to Dr. Phil?  I see one of the upcoming show topics is dealing with a mental illness.  This board is a support board where we all support each other.  Welcome to the board.

 

 
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