Topic : 07/09 "You Owe Me an Apology!"

Vance was obviously a loser prior to marriage, so one has to wonder why Christie married him...and then brought children into the relationship!

From the short blurb on Vance, he doesn't sound as though he has any redeaming qualities; any decent woman deserves MORE THAN an apology from him, but he doesn't sound like the type to give one and mean it. Anxious to see, though!

.

Tammy and her husband are lacking communication, trust and lots of other important variables that are necessary for a healthy, happy marriage. Hopefully Dr. Phil can help. Life is too short to be jealous, unhappy, unhealthy and living in chaos!!!

APOLOGY???? This woman needs to walk out on this jerk  yesterday!  Anyone  who would talk to children that way needs to have Social Services involved. That is verbal abuse, and can be as detrimental as physical abuse. 

As for the gastric bypass surgery.  Aren't things like that supposed to be joint decisions? 

I think the mother owes her children an apology (as well as counseling) for bringing this abusive man into their lives. She needs to grow up, stop asking for an apology, and put her children and their welfare before her romantic interests. Get them into a healthy environment. Its her responsibility!

I understand completely, I have lived in an abusive relationship for 34 years.  But I wish I had had the courage to leave the relationship along time ago.  Not only have I suffered but staying taught my children how to be abusive.  I feel ashamed to say this but I hope that my son's never marry because they are more abusive than their father.

You can't control other people, one can only control your own behavior.  I have made myself sick with resentment, because of the way I have been treated over the years. The only person I have hurt is myself.  Expectations of others is an illusion.  Realize this, move forward and your life will become better!

Hopefully, one day I will  have the courage to do the same.

Sadly, when a person cannot apologize of their own volition, it is worthless to demand it.  I found over many years that there are very few people that will apologize willingly let alone admit or take responsibility for inappropriate actions.  The very best you can hope for is a positive change and maybe you can forgive which helps much more personally than an apology ever will.  This woman and her children need to walk away and determine why she herself subconciously chooses abusive men.  I doubt seriously she set out thinking "I want to marry an abusive person to hurt me and my children"!  Many people can be deceitful for a period of time but there are always warning signs that I believe we cannot or choose not to see thinking I can fix this or things will change after we get married.  I learned that the hard way.  I chose not to remarry since the chances of doing it again are very high without long term counseling.  I did receive counseling but found my life much better being happpy with myself and living on my own with my pets.  There is nothing better than having a simple peaceful life.   I wish only the best for the woman and her children.

I disagree with the two peoples opinion - if i wanted something in my marriage that I KNEW was right for me and for a totally stupid reason my husband disagreed, then sorry but I would do what I wanted - in my mind a married person has just as much right to do what they want for THEMSELVES that a single person does.  My ex used to laugh at his friends when they would say GOD - you LET her do that or whatever and he wold just say that the word LET was isnt our marriage vows!  Good answer I thought !  Why was the spouse so opposed to the surgery I wonder? 

As to the issue of the abusive husband - I just say RUN to the wife - why women, or men too for that matter, marry someone that they know treats their children badly is beyond my comprehension.  Shame on the parents for EVER allowing this to go on for longer than one SECOND !!!

An Apology Doctor Me Owe Phil You. I have never seen this one before.  See you tomorrow After-

noon. Sincerley Your. Russell Vlaanderen.------------------------------------------------------------------------