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Topic : 10/11 Munchausen Mom

Number of Replies: 375
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Created on : Friday, October 05, 2007, 11:28:17 am
Author : DrPhilBoard1
Dr. Phil takes a look at the unthinkable: making your own child sick to fulfill a disturbing need to get medicine, sympathy and attention. The idea might sound unimaginable, but for people with a psychological disorder called Munchausen by Proxy, it’s irresistible. First, see disturbing footage of parents caught on tape actually causing harm to their children. Then, Dr. Phil looks into the mind of one woman, Tracy, convicted of trying to harm her youngest daughter by constantly keeping her sick. Hear from Tracy's oldest daughter, Heather, who survived years of her mother’s abuse. She says her mom forced her into a wheelchair unnecessarily, took her to almost 400 medical visits, and caused her to spend over 100 days of her life in hospital beds -- needlessly. Most disturbing of all is the secret Heather revealed to police about what her mother buried in their back yard. When Dr. Phil makes a phone call to Tracy in prison, will she acknowledge the problem with her parenting? And could she be preparing to have another child? Hear Dr. Phil’s strong words for this Munchausen mom. Plus, how are Tracy’s children doing now that she is out of their lives? Note: Viewer discretion is advised. Join the discussion.

Find out what happened on the show.

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October 31, 2007, 3:04 pm CDT

helpthekids

raven thank you very much for your support i wish there were  more people like you around here in fla, we have been through so much and with no help from nobody. my family has turned on me and wants nothing to do with us cause we took in my brothers kids ,but they are better off now than they ever were,and have more love than anyone could ever ask for.they might not have the best of toys but they have love and caring.
 
November 8, 2007, 8:23 pm CST

Re: Muchausen mom

when do you guys plan on showing this taping again.  I was at work when it was and am really intrested in watching this episode
 
November 27, 2007, 8:13 pm CST

Munchhaussen Moms

Quote From: melyssa_sea

I just wanted to add that with Munchausens the mom's are only abusing these kids medically but almost always it is physical as well. I was often beaten and unable to go to school because of this and I remember Heather also saying that her mom would 'spank' her for no reason.

 

These mom's are so adept at lying and hiding the truth that they are able to hide and or manipulate anything and everything to their favour. My entire school life teachers would ask questions and sometimes I would lie but even when I did get the gall to tell the truth of what was happening they would go straight back to my mom and tell her what I had said which just cemented the fact that she had all the power and that I had no one to help or protect me. My mom had lied to everyone around her lawyers ministers teachers friends and even family still to this day believe that I am what my mom has said I am.  I finally found my dad a few years ago and as I thought she had been lying to me every day of my whole life about him too. I think the biggest problem is that the Munchausens sufferer doesnt believe they are lying - the truly believe what they are saying!! The Munchausens mom is abusive to a child in her care in every way known to man - emotionally, physically, mentally, medically and so many more.

 

I have seen the question asked as to why she (Tracy) would hide pregnancy and have home births when she could get so much attention from it - It is becuase it is not about attention as much as it is about the power. The power they have as a mother it makes them feel so powerful to know that they are the one thing keeping the child alive and that the Dr's will believe ANYTHING they (Munchausens mom) say, I believe Tracy did what she did because SHE COULD! My mom was very much the same - she would always test things and she more often than not found she could get away with anything so would try the next level and the next and so on and so on. Munchausens isnt just about taking the child to the Dr's or the attention, it is about power, it is about THEIR MIND! it is about A LOT OF SELF PITY!!!!! Poor me - I have a sick child, Poor me - look how much I do for my child - Poor me - NO ONE HELPS ME Poor me - WITHOUT ME YOU WOULD HAVE NO ONE Poor me - NO ONE ELSE WANTS YOU Poor me look I took care of a child that no one else would and look what happened to me - Prison has just played right into that mind set for Tracy, as far as the Munchausens mom goes everything in the whole world is about them they honestly dont know that it isnt! They need to feel important and the most powerful the one and only.

 

 

   This desribes my ex-daughter-in-law. She once asked me if I thought her childrens' Dr thinks she has munchaussens after she sent me to the office for an appt with a perfectly healthy child. The Dr was very upset. I had her write a note to the Dr. as I always do when I have taken them. It is so scary when I think of what the situation is now. Grandma in the shadows now!
 
December 27, 2007, 11:12 am CST

This is one I'd missed

I hope this segment is aired again, as I missed it the first time.  Munchausens is a VERY dangerous, very serious mental disorder.  It is almost like pedophilia, as the person who really DOES have it, can appear to be as normal looking as a concerned mother...could be anyone.

Doctors must be better trained to pick this up, yet, it often becomes a Catch 22, enabling the disease to flourish.  Excessive visits to the doctor was mentioned by  one posting on the forum.  Well, I'd say that's a clue, but with recent changes in New York 's polocy of medical absences, it's a rough call, especially in grammer school.  If your child is home for three consecutive days, there must be a doctor's note...so, in order to not be guilty of MEDICAL NEGLECT, you must go to the doctor...for a head cold...anything that when I was in school, was not needed.  A letter from my mother was sufficient.  If you aren't being hit with Medical neglect, then, it's educational neglect....in primary grades.

Visits to the doctor have dramatically increased in the last decade, by State mandating....and I personally KNOW of women who were suspect of Munchausens, who were obeying the law.

We had a big balleyhoo at my kids' grammer school (thank God, one is now in college, the other, a High School senior).  Working parents are sending their children to school with runny noses, low grade fevers, stomach virus...and many other contagious diseases.  I always was a stay at home Mom...and I resented these kids getting mine sick, because I keep my kids HOME...especially when they were so young, as do many other parents, when there are such symptoms. A group of us tried to address the issue and were told by the principal that the school cannot tell a parent to keep their child home.  This, for some reason, is not neglect...everything else is...just not sending sick children into class.  Mine got sick once too often...and I went into the classrooms of both, and all you heard was sneezing, coughing, some children had their heads on the desk, half asleep.  This is in a top rated school....love to see the bottom ones.

I also was becoming tired of bringing a child to a doctor, who SHOULD have been at home, in bed...getting well, not in an office with more germs.  So, I pulled them out of public school, put them into private, where there is still some remnants of sanity, common sense and common courtesy...like respect for the health of others....and their attendence improved, the colds were less frequent, and I wasn't living at the doctor's office.  The rumor at the public school, I had Munchausens.  At the time, I was devastated.  Today, I laugh at the ignorance, but feel great fear for the prospect of true Munchausens being assimilated in this  crazy world, until there is a fatality.

Not once was there ever a school seminar about this, it's always on drugs (necessary), alcohal(also necessary), but there is just so much one can say on those two issues.  Nothing about pedophilia, porn, Munchausens, the Nambla website(ageism as an argument for man/boy sex), presented to parents at these all important monthly meetings we are encouraged to attend.  Fundraising is the hot button, and it really does not need to consume better than half of school meetings.  When I got fed up with the lack of important information, I just stopped going...why waste my time to appear to be a "concerned" parent when I could fork over my money to the fundraisers as they came along.  My suggestions for more serious problems were dismissed, by both the public and private sector...but they questioned why only 10% of parents regularly attended meetings.  We (the absent (90%) wrote to the school board asking for topics to really inform us about problems that exist, how to spot a red flag.  We also requested speakers from the professional arena...who volunteered to take their time and discuss them.  The letters were "under consideration".

If they were EVER put into practice, it was after my children graduated, so maybe they are still under "consideration".  I hold tremendous contempt for the lack of effort, in my experience with schools, when they fail to address matters that could PROTECT CHILDREN...It's a buzz phrase, and a disgrace that the information is there, not shared, and you must hear it from T.V. or research every mental disorder yourself.

We have so many resources, yet the primary networks, like school meetings, will not share them.  When you hear of a tragedy, such as a buried baby, the story of Heather and Tracy, you ask...how did I NOT know?  Simple answer....we aren't  given the information until it's too late, if even then.  Most parents are just not able to be trained in every field...would be nice to hear those who are, given the floor at these meetings.

 
April 24, 2009, 10:51 am CDT

HI

Quote From: korinsha

Not necessarily disagreeing... you're dead on about everything concerning BPD.  I know, because I suffer from it... and others have suffered for my, I dunno what to call it... deformity works for me.  It's a nightmare to be afflicted with this disorder, especially because most people have no idea what's wrong with them.  Your emotions become your rationale, your feelings twist reality so that you see what you feel you should (if that makes sense).  The aggression, the self-loathing, the addictions, the inability to connect with other humans... it's just horrific.  It IS treatable, but you really really have to want help, and admitting you need it in the first place is so indescribably difficult I can't even explain.  Just offering a perspective from the other side (forgive me if you also suffer from this, it just seemed like you survived someone with BPD), maybe letting people understand how it can twist someone so badly that they injure their children could shed some light on this. 

 

If anyone's wondering (or read this far!) I have sought help and I'm being treated with medication and couseling, and my life has done a Dr.Phil-worthy 180*.  Seeing this show was painful; I hate being able to understand such a messed up frame of mind.  Hey, if it helps anyone else, I guess that's okay with me.  Thanks for the insight, and the information sources!

I have been involved witha a man who is 69 and BPD and it pains me he is can be such a sweet person and loving caring.

I want to be supprtive but at a loss. A lot of my friends told me to quit having anything to do with him, but I care for him so much.

 
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