Topic : 12/25 Parent Trap

The biological mother is evil for lying to him from the beginning.  The stepmother is evil for dredging this thing up after all these years just because she doesn't want her husband to pay child support and Enrique is evil for abadoning the child he thought was his for 10 years.

 

The only innocent person in all this mess is that young girl.  She doesn't deserve any of this.

I agree that this should have been handled with the child foremost in both parents minds. That said, there should be legal ramifications for the mother. She lied to the courts for monetary gain! I am a woman who raised 3 children by myself and had to fight my ex husband every step of the way for child support so, I do feel for Moms in that situation. I believe though, that know woman has the right to falsify a court document, use her daughter as a means of financial gain, and then be protected by the courts for doing so, no matter how long it's been! If he had refused to pay any child support for any number of children when ordered by the court to do so, he would be facing possible jail time. Women should not have the right to do this to men.............. ever. She owed it to her daughter to tell the truth and make amends. Allowing her daughter and her ex-husband to continue their relationship in honesty and love.

You turn it on him, are you as radical a feminist as that Gal Attorney was.  It is about the children and the well being, BUT, you say the Mother's behavior doesn't matter in your eyes?  WAKE UP, you are condoning a crime.  The Mother committed fraud, lied, deceived.  She should be punished up to and including fines, prison.  I agree with one individuals entry of helping to ensure children are taken care of, but that doesn't mean that a woman has the freedom to commit a crime and never be punished for her actions.    You seem that the childrens welfare should be more important then the crime the Mother committed; then in a situation a Mother commits murder or theft, she should not be punished cause it is not in the best interest of the Child.  WAKE UP PLEASE!!!

Granted the way the "father " handled this with the child was unfair to her but after hearing her  ( the child )speak she is being coached by the mother who is a liar and cheat and couldn't care less about the child only her revenge on her ex husband . She ( the cheating mother ) sat there very smug and high and mighty and she was the one who was deceptive and cunning all those years.

I am surprised at Dr. Phil who basically gave her a pass , if he really was honest he would have told her she was the one who was responsible for this horrific situation she put her innocent daughter in and if the truth be told the " father should have both girls in his custody because that lying SOB ( mother ) should never be allowed to see the children again because her lessons in life are vindictive.

And Dr. Phil having the Lawyer Gloria A on to sell her book was very cheesey this was an important topic and I feel you missed the whole point ..

I firmly believe that what Enrique did was morally wrong. But I also believe that he SHOULD NOT be held financially responsible for a child that is not his. If Enrique and Selina want to continue an emotional bond and relationship thats fabulous. But to make a man pay financially for a child that the mother knew all along possibly could not be his is JUST WRONG. If I could in anyway make a change in the system to reflect the fathers in this country who continue to be wronged I would do it. And the comment that Ms. Gloria made that the real problem in this country is all the "unpaid" child support not the problem that Enrique was facing is sickening to hear. Yes the numbers and statistics are hugely different, the problems are still there. And I dont think its fair. Something needs to be done. And be done quickly. Before this continues to get worse. And more woman think that they can get "over" on a man AND the system.

Unless you are in either of the parents shoes you have no idea what decisions you would make or how you would have handled it differently.  I married a man who has two sons from a previous marriage and before we were married we discussed the fact that the youngest one may not be his.  I asked him if he wanted to find out if he was or was not and he decided that he didn't care.  He was his son no matter what.  So we never did anything, took both boys on the weekends and have enjoyed every minute of our lives together.

 

I do believe that the father should have handled it differently, but not being in his shoes we can't really judge can we.

 

The child should always come first.

About your show today. I feel the way he told her was wrong. But I also feel he doesn't have a legal right to pay for a child that is not his. If he would have been told in the begin that the child is not his, then this wouldn't be a problem today. He shouldn't have turned his back on her and broke a bond that he had with the child. I believe the child's rights should come first and if the DNA test proves that he is not the child's father then he shouldn't have to pay. The only one that is getting hurt is the child. She was and is still to young to really understand what is happening. All she knows is the man she thought was her father abandoned her, and she doesn't really understand why. The way he told her is going to cause a lot of problems for her in your life now. She isn't going to be able to trust men fully. But not only her, but her sister sees how her father treated her sister, and also is to young to understand. We as women have a respondablity to be honest as well as men. Men are made to pay for their actions, well we women should be made to pay for ours. There is no excuse to lay to someone you are to love. If you start a relationship out on a lie then it will not last. She lied to him about one child, what about the other child. I think his new wife had the right to tell him her feelings. But he shouldn't have abandoned her like he did. No he shouldn't have to pay child support, but because he was the only father he had known he does have a legal right to support her emotionally. Help her grow into a young woman that can count on him to help her through life. Her mother should have to repay the child support that was not his to pay.

I live in a small town in Southeastern Oklahoma and I personally know 2 men who are paying child support on children that are not their biological children.  I do not believe that he should pay on a child that is not his and I do think he should be there for her emotionally.  The ex wife is about the money and anyone who would lie about it is definitely not worried about the child's emtional health unless she is caught.  I do feel compasion for all the children that are caught up in these messes that the adults make and ultimately they are the ones that pay the price.  I would hope Enrique and Selina could mend some of the hurt feelings and heartache so he would be that shoulder for her in her teen years, she will need it.

I do not have any children but I have a dozen pets each of whom are individuals with their own personality and needs. Needless to say I did not give birth to any of them but they are truely my 'children' and I love them each and every one. If someone came to me and said any of them were not really mine I would fight tooth and nail to KEEP them because of the bonds of love - money is not an issue. This man does not DESERVE to be this child's father because he is NOT father material. If money means more to him than a child with whom he has bonded for 10 years, then there is something WRONG with him!  He makes Me SICK! True parenting is not about biology or money. It is about LOVE.

In an ideal society, perhaps the attorney who favors the ideology that a childs 'bond' with a father warrents that man to pay for the act of conception.  However, in the real world, we live in a society that is not bound by emotions (unless put into law) so i thought.  The laws of the country dictate that a wrongful act should be corrected, not based on 'emotions' but based on the law.   Otherwise, i would assume that individuals who belong to the big brother programs would also have to pay some kind of 'child support' of the child they take under their wing.  Or children who are mistakingly placed in the wrong home of a parent that did not give birth, would not have to worry about returning the child to the rightful parent simply because the child has grown a bond with the new parents.   How about that of a society who have grown a 'bond' to the idea of an innocent man who has been criminalized by accident...undering the ideology that a 'bond' has been made with that of the public and the individual, that man....no matter if he was innocent or not, would stay an inmate because we have simply grown a bond to the idea that 'he did it'.  Yes there is an injustice and it lies with every facet of society.  However, without common sense and the basic law, these too can be corrected no matter what the bond that a child (or an adult) may have become accustomed to.  

In my opinion, whether a man has been paying for a child that is not his should not be the fault of his and should be corrected.  If anything, under the law the mother should be prosecuted thus serving as a reminder to other mothers who are 'thinking' of lying about a conception that it would be a crime.  Whenever money is taken from another person, under false pretense, in this country......isn't that called 'Fraud"??