Topic : 12/25 Parent Trap

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Created on : Friday, October 26, 2007, 02:49:00 pm
Author : DrPhilBoard1

(Original Air Date: 10/29/07) Fraud. lies. conspiracy. They may sound like the latest Washington scandal, but these are allegations of exes at war over child support. Dr. Phil's guests claim they became victims of the perfect crime when they were led to believe they fathered a child that was not biologically their own and were forced to pay. First up, Enrique says he was shocked and angered to discover he was not the father of his youngest daughter, Selina, and that she was conceived during his ex-wife, Maria's, adulterous affair. Maria says he raised Selina but then abandoned her to save money. Why does Maria say Enrique's current wife is to blame for the fractured relationship? Next, 13-year-old Selina speaks one on one with Dr. Phil. Will she decide to let the man she once called Daddy back in her life? Then, Carnell Smith, who uses the online moniker, "Man4Justice," suffered a similar fate to Enrique, and but he fought and won. He says he's tired of seeing women trap men and get away with it. A heated debate ensues between him and feminist attorney, Gloria Allred, who argues that men like Enrique should continue to act as the father ... and continue paying! Talk about the show here.


Find out what happened on the show.


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October 30, 2007, 12:13 pm PDT

Money take it out make it the last part of the answer and you would see the child then would be first.

Afternoon to all who may read this...  I caught the last 15 or so mins of the the show on parent Trap and i have to say be it the lady Laywer made me very up set with her comments about Dad's not paying support I am here to tell you My Ex wife is all about the money.........  I truly beleave if you was to drop the money factor out of 60% of the case in court you would find ex's would get along better.....  Do i feel this man should pay for support NO!  Do i feel he should be in this girls life YES!  she is the only Male she has know all her life.   Everything in life comes down to the all MIGHT BUCK....  and I don't care what jugde or lawyer say it is about the kid...  it is about the MONEY....  and that Lady Lawyer knows it too....    For her to say it she was for the child BS...    I will have to finish later I am getting even more frustrated.  When i think about this whole thing and how the system says it is about the Child  BS...  And i will also say there are DEAD BEAT PARENTS   and todays world only seams to care about installing the WORD DAD to that DEAD BEAT part...  I can not wait to the day i no longer have to deal with my EX...  I can then start to live my life to it's fullest with my girls.....     I have to say I am one of the lucky dads   i have 6 months custody of my youngest and my oldest lives with me full time.... up and until my odest turned 18 my kids lived 6monts with me and 6 months with thier mother... and i can tell you she has tried for the past 15 yrs to take them out of my life and i have had to fight all the time for them.  I am getting off track here...   anyway my point is take the money out of the picture and you would see things change... 
 

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October 30, 2007, 12:14 pm PDT

Paternity Fraud

 

My husband and I are supporting another man's child because in the State of California if a child was born during a marriage then that child is considered a child of the marriage.  We did not find out this until the little girl was 10 years old when her mother decided she should (without consulting my husband) tell this little girl that the person she thought was her father really is not...........  My husband is a wonderful man and continues to love this little girl as much as he ever has..... my question is why should we have to pay $1300.00 a month to support another man's child?  DNA testing can get you off a murder charge but not out of supporting a child that is not yours.  Where is the justice in that?  People say the child should come first and I agree, the mother should find the "real father" and force him to pay support as well as her supporting the child herself.........

 
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October 30, 2007, 12:18 pm PDT

10/29 Parent Trap

Quote From: fromthesquare

This certainly has been a passionate topic.  There has been a lot of anger aimed at the right people in this matter but I think that Gloria Allred is not one of them.  She was on the show to explain and defend the law.  She is a lawyer and Dr Phil is not. Who better to explain the law than a lawyer?  Maybe the laws need to be tweaked to include our latest scientific gains in DNA testing but, she is right when she says that the laws reflect the best interest of the child. 

 

The man that the child grew up with as the father, loves as the father and looks up to as the father has rights in this case too.  I think he should go back to the courts and demand a relationship with this child.  The laws protect the father too with regards to visitation and the bonds that were established. 

 

Should he pay?  That seems to be at the heart of everyone's passionate responses.  Maria did not help matters sitting on the stage enjoying all the pain and anguish that she wreaked on her ex.  She was certainly not a likable character on the show.  She was so outlandish that the best interest of the child seemed secondary.

I'm really sad you think Enrique should continue to pay! It is not his responsibility. The mother lyed and deceived and made Enrique hurt and angry. His first response was snapping in anger for the injustice that was done him.

 

If you forced Maria to pay back all support and ordered permenant visitation for Enrique you would defuse his anger to the injustice therefore freeing him to love the child, voluntarily. And then the child would bennifit with a voluntary,  loveing, relationship with the only man she knew as a father.

 
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October 30, 2007, 12:21 pm PDT

You are next buddy ...

Quote From: manofgoods

Hmmm...what I believe is that women like Maria are afraid to tell the men that their child isn't theirs, because they are afraid that he is going to leave her, & her family, & that's what I can understand on. It also happened with Frankie & Gwen a few weeks ago (just titled "Frankie & Gwen"). I also have to say that women like her aren't evil creatures. True, what she did was wrong, but probably has a good reason, & that women do bad things just as the men, but they're definitely not evil. No matter what bad things they have done, I would never degrade women, like calling them awful names & such, because they're totally disrespectful. I also think that the man should continue to be in her life, just because he's been in her life for so long. If I was in the man's situation, I would continue to be there for the child, & support him/her. Should DNA matter? Absolutely not.
Women can to be evil. You need to wake up!
 
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October 30, 2007, 12:21 pm PDT

10/29 Parent Trap

Quote From: jclark

I am a single mother of 4 girls and i watched this show yesterday it broke my heart besides the fact that mothers or women should just not do this its unfair and i think it should be illegal. I have to battle everday with my ex to make sure he pays his child support. but when he goes out of state into another country there is nothing the state of washington can do this is unbelivble I am hear to tell you if my kids dad would be apart our there life and not pay i would be happy it is about the support that the father has to be pay to help support his child but really who always pays in the end our children do no matter what
I trully admire the way you think. A father has much more value than just money.
 
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October 30, 2007, 12:23 pm PDT

Disappointed

I am very disappointed in Gloria Alreds continuing to use the statement "in the best interest of the child" I agree that it is tragic that the man in this case removed himself from Salena's life, however he has expressed remorse and wants to rebuild. I do believe that alot of the childs opinions come from the mother. I think that it is a travesty that the courts think it is fair for a man to pay for another mans child, but I think it is a greater travesty that the mother misled and lied to her ex husband and by association both of her children. To go back to my first statement about Ms. Alred. She is nothing more than an overrated drama queen. She immediatley started her comments in a rage and pointed fingers only at the man. As a woman with 2 female children, I am ashamed at her state of mind. What message do we give our daughters of the world if a woman of her "education" is allowed to go on the air and defend the infedelity, betrayal and lies of another woman. It is time in society for everyone to take the responsibility of their wrong doing. Should he pay, no! she should reimburse him and allow him to try to have a mutual relationship with Salena.
 
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October 30, 2007, 12:24 pm PDT

Shameful!!!!!

I think all three of the so called adults are each thinking of their own self interests instead of the girls.How might it feel to the older sibling to know she has been the chosen one over her sister? I think the only one acting as an adult is the young girl. Good for her, Hopefully she will be able to keep her sense of self worth into and thru her teenage dating years and beyond.
 
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October 30, 2007, 12:25 pm PDT

Cold hearted woman

I  was shocked by Enrique's new wife.  I would not be so quick to tell people that he follows my insticts after how he treated an innocent 10 year old child. The fact that she went along with that behavior makes her look like a cold, unfeeling  and jealous woman.  Jealous that a 10 year old was getting some of her husbands money. Stopping those funds affected Selana more than Maria.  It bothered me that she didn't even seem to care about Selenas feelings, only that Maria had tricked her husband into paying child support for a child that wasn't biologically his.. a child however that he had loved and cared for for 10 years. She was a major factor in her husbands decision to stop paying and charge Maria with fraud.

 

 Who in their right mind tells the person they profess to love something that will only hurt them. Who tells someone I don't think your child is really yours, what was there to gain.. money is all I can figure.. Is this woman really that cold? How can she look in the mirror in the mornings.

 

 Most husbands after 10 years with a child would be more than happy to continue to care for the child if this came about...most would sit them down when old enough and say I am not your real father but I feel as though I am and hope that we can continue on as we have in the past.

 

We cared for a young gal here from Nicaragua for 6 months and have started an account in her country to help her with her medical expenses, food, etc.  She is not our child, but we connected while caring for her and we talk every month and do what we can for her and her family.  This was a hard show for me to watch, turning his back on that child was very disturbing for me.

 

  I understand Enrique's anger at Maria and no I don't think women should be able to just name anyone for child support but to inform Selena and abandoned her that way, wow, my heart went out to that little girl... If he didn't want to pay. go to court, confront Maria, but protect the innocent child in the best way you can. The fact that the new wife was okay with all this and didn't do all she could to correct the seperation between Enrique and Selena or to push for them to reconnect really upsets me and makes me wonder if she is a mother herself?

 

 I felt wife #2 was way out of line in the Selena / Enrique/Maria picture.  She had a motive, why else push Enrique not to pay, come on.  I hope she is happy that she destroyed a young childs trust, security, and love, not to mention the future emotional problems this young girl will experience due to this.  As far as I am concerned if Enrique gets out of paying.... then the money is as good as Blood Money.  Money gained at someone elses expense.. Selena's!  They are taking from a child not from Maria.

 

Yes Maria dupped Enrique to cover her mistake,  but it was mostly for Selanas sake..(you could consider it blood money but I don't think it went into her pocket) Wife #2  why so focused on this? Money, money, money, plain and simple. It certainly wasn't to put a smile on her husbands face or that of a young child. Shame on that cold hearted women. 

 

 For years women have done what is best for their child.  they have been known to lie, steal and cheat if they have to for them.. sad but true.  I feel society is partly to blame for that.  A lot of young women get pregnant and are left raising the child till the day they die, while many men walk away and continue on with their lives. There are many good men out there don't misunderstand me, but having 2 girls I do worry about who they are involved with and how responsible that person is.

 

Enrique what you did to that child to me is way worse than the fraud committed against you by Maria.

 

 
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October 30, 2007, 12:25 pm PDT

More than a cash cow

Quote From: vixiex

Fathers are more than a checkbook.  I don't think he should have to pay if he isn't the biological father - especially since he's been lied to this whole time.  HOWEVER, if he's raised this child and is the Dad that the child knows - I would assume there is love between the two of them.  That relationship should continue. 

 

Biology has less to do with parenthood than love, trust, teaching and caring that comes from that relationship.  "Anyone can be a father - but it takes someone special to be a Dad"

 

Just my 2 cents.

I agree that we are much more than a cash cow for deceptive women. If we make a mistake and marry such a woman and take on the responsibilty of her children, no matter who she had as the father for each of them, it is our own fault and need to be the responsible person. However, if by trickery the man is caused to be responsible for a child that is not his then the cash drain needs to be stopped BUT if the bonding with the child has any merit he should continue to be emotionally responsible.

 

Even though I have no blood related grandchildren, I still have 12 grandchildren and 2 great grandchilden, that are mine in an emotional way as well as several more that claim me as their Pap, Poppy or grandpa.

 

For some of the children and grandchildren, I am the only father image they have or will have. This I don't mind as is a gift from God but the deception is very hard to forgive. Praise the Lord that he has forgiven a deceptive wife.

 
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October 30, 2007, 12:27 pm PDT

10/29 Parent Trap

Quote From: jmjacobsen

The part that got me was Gloria, the woman lawyer. She is such a moron. She ignored everyone to spew her message, which, by the way, had NOTHING to do with the show. She's an idiot in my book. What a waste of good air time!
AMEN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Hallelluia!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I will have to agree.
 
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