Topic : Defining Your Authentic Self

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Created on : Thursday, July 07, 2005, 11:20:02 am
Author : dataimport
Have you read "Self Matters" or become familiar with the process of uncovering your authentic self from watching the show? Share your story here.

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July 21, 2008, 6:52 am PDT

That's why I used my first name

Quote From: ritehere

Marcia, it was this concept of being present in life that inspired my username.

(I am aware that many think I am a "right-fighter", that I think I'm aways right.)

 

But when I decided to join this party, after being a "lurker" for a bit, this name just popped up and it felt "rite."

I realized after watching Dr. Phil's show a couple of times, I needed to be open about my life and to tell the world my secrets.  It allowed me to be present and to finally acknowledge that I can move on.  And it really did work. 
 
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July 21, 2008, 6:58 am PDT

Cool dream Brenda ...

I find dreams have meaning ... sometimes they're easy to figure out, other times, they just leave me "blank".

I like your belief that those "blank" times will be made known as my time comes to a close.
 
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July 21, 2008, 7:05 am PDT

Be peaceful....

Quote From: marcia52

I'm finally going to start working on losing weight.  I've been practicing so many healthy behaviors since I committed to Dr. Phil's Weight Loss Challenge back in 2003, which has lead me to "fix and repair" all sorts of areas in my life that were not working for me.  I can't believe how different I am today.

After reading Tolle's 2 books, I realized that PRESENT is where I am right now. It's amazing actually ... I used to worry about WHAT'S NEXT .. now, it's well, this is what I'm going to focus on today and tomorrow, well, we'll see what the day brings.

I'm starting all the 7 Keys again .. can't read the book anymore.  However, I'm substituting other books and articles for them.  Keys 1 & 2 are being replaced by Judith Beck's THE BECK DIET SOLUTION.  It's all about Cognitive Therapy .. you have to choose 2 different diet plans .. your choice ... and she says not to do it for 2 weeks.  That first you have to prepare yourself.  Luckily for me, I've practiced or mastered the exercises so far.  I have some that I will be practicing more and more ... however, she gives me all sorts of helpful SWITCH words and thoughts which I have to read each day 2x or more.

Anyway, I figure by Dec. 31st, I'll be 10 lbs less than I am today.

Marcia, keep a peaceful, happy state of mind and it will further your weight loss goals.

I've always known that stress causes me to not only be drawn towards sugary foods and starches, but it causes me to retain weight also.

I keep a weight record, weighing in once a week. I noticed that my weight spiked a couple of weeks ago while I was away from home (at the mercy of other's cooking), and worried about my friend's health after her heart attack and my son's homelessness. There was no internet connection or phone coverage there. I know it's a get-away for them, and I didn't want to keep using their phone to check up on people. it was very stressful. Anyway, I've lost 7lbs over the last 2 weeks just being home and knowing the ones I love are safe and sound again.

By the way, my son got a job last week. He is in much better spirits also.

 
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July 21, 2008, 7:11 am PDT

If you're going to dream, why not dream big?

Quote From: blgspc

Its so strange. Im always having these dreams!

 

Thats right Ive been visiting again!

 

Last night I dreamt that I was at this huge gathering and both Dr. Phil and Robin were on stage, there were hundreds of people, I was sitting among the crowd, just listening and as hes talking he suddenly stops, then turning to Robin he essentially asks, Are you picking up anything? Robin just chuckles saying, Yep! Shes here. So, then he just stops what hes talking about and loudly shouts, Alright! We know youre here. Just come on out! Im sitting there saying to myself, How Cute! Theyre have a little entertaining diversion going on. Thats when he says, Brenda we know youre here just come on up! So, help me in MY dream Im saying, Darn! I wanted to surprise them both later! So then I just get up and march onto the stage. Then he looks at me laughing saying, So, what are you doing? Decided to become a stalker or something?! Amazingly I respond with, No! I just wanted to see you both again. You didnt have to call me on stage! Im in my lounging pants for crying out loud! I have my hands on my hips.

Hes still giggling, Well, heck! I didnt know that you would be lame enough to wear lounging slacks to a Dr. Phil event! Besides this is just a dream! Wait for us back stagein your lounging pants. he continues to laugh.

And, as I exit the stage, there is this funny fade out. Then Im sitting there in a covered sun area with both of them and hes skimming an article in a lounge chair, wearing glasses, perched half way on his nose. (Im always surprises when Im not star-struck in these dreams.) It was sort of like having a talk with friends or family. Strange. Anyhow, I start with, Well, this is a first. How did you know? He becomes reflective, I think it was when, as you mentioned on the message board, about people knowing each other before were born. Now, that made sense to me.

You arent reading the message boards, I know! I exclaimed.

As youve pointed out, when would I have time?! However, that thought was then out there on one of my boards and I picked it up and also you believe that souls travel in packs. As I sat there looking at him, I respond with,

I do believe that souls travel in packs but I never wrote that on the message board! I retorted.

I Know! I know! Im just saying that it was out there and somehow attached to you. then he starts laughing again. I bristle.

Now, What?!? I asked annoyed.

Im thinking of you wearing those lounging pants to a public event. as hes busts out laughing.

AND, AS YOU POINTED OUT THIS IS JUST A DREAM! I remind him. Dont you even want to know why Im here?!? Still chuckling he says,

Oh yes, why did you come visiting Dr. Phil in your lounging clothes? Im sighing and shaking my head.

You sustained a loss, remember? Im here to console you. I reported.

OhwellThanks. (In the dream I knew exactly what the loss was! Not now, though. I think that it was just the anniversary of a loss. Cant be sure.)

Oh, and I came up with a theory about dreams that I wanted to share with you! I reported enthusiastically. He looks on.

Well, go ahead. Im listening. he says.

Well, you know how we have all of these seemingly odd dreams. Some just dont make any sense? He nods. Well, I had this hypothesis that at the very end of our lives, in the very last microseconds, all of the dreams- odd ones and all- come together and form this really Nutsolla but much more lucid movie that spells out what we were here to accomplish on our visit to Earth. And, in that moment, our missions become crystal clear! He just sits there thinking. Then states,

So, what youre saying, here. What your putting forth, is that theres a fundamentally sane reason WHY you came to a Dr. Phil event in pajama pants?!? hes again laughing.

Stop IT! Youre in the spirit, when youre dreaming! You just think youre that guy. You know youre WAY more than just him, just as Im more than that Carolina girl, person! That reminds me, I had a dream about Oprah- my spirit sister- and do you know she was actually condescending to me! And, when I called her on it, she just responded with, Well, Im just telling you, that theres dust on my favorite lamp, that you missed! So, I just told her, Yeah and someone left your cake out in the rain, as well! She was being a snobto ME, her spirit sister! So, help me, in that dream I was forced to call Gayle to make her stop! I was even a bit upset with Gayle cause she thought the whole thing was SO funny! I went on mildly irritated. Then he adds, 

Yeah, and in the Earth world, I actually know Oprah! I dont have to wear my PJs to her functions, or track her down in my dreams. I just pick up the phone! I was just rolling my eyes. Besides you got that twin thing with..um....whats her face to help you with bonding issues and to help you more fully get in touch with your own spirit and the spiritual nature of all bonds. Why are you whining?!? he asked kinda cocky.

Whats her face is also my spirit sister, as well as YOURS! And, Im NOT whining. I just miss everyone. Thats all! Thats when I notice that Robins been just sitting there listening the whole time and then she says,

You think you got stuff going on! In the spirit, I still can not believe that I married him! I cant even believe that in Earth terms, I actually embrace that! I mean I adore who he truly is but, married him, I mean come on give me a break! Robins just shaking her head and as we are all laughing, I begin to understand that he needed her spirit to humble him a bit more and she needed him to help her because earlier she was a bit too meek and humble. My, How Shes Grown!!! LOL!

 

Brenda

Brenda, I still can't get the picture of Dr Phil giggling out of my head. GIGGLING?!

 

Hmm, I wonder if the whole "lounge pants" thing is your version of the naked dream? (Now I'm giggling!)

 

 

 
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July 21, 2008, 7:14 am PDT

What's in a name?

Quote From: marcia52

I realized after watching Dr. Phil's show a couple of times, I needed to be open about my life and to tell the world my secrets.  It allowed me to be present and to finally acknowledge that I can move on.  And it really did work. 

I suppose this says something about me doesn't it? I find I'm drawn towards the idea of choosing names for myself pertaining to the different boards I visit.

Does it mean I'm not satisfied with my own name? Or that I crave a different persona?

could be....

 
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July 21, 2008, 8:58 am PDT

You Know...

Quote From: marcia52

I find dreams have meaning ... sometimes they're easy to figure out, other times, they just leave me "blank".

I like your belief that those "blank" times will be made known as my time comes to a close.

I find the dreams with Dr. Phil and Oprah surprising because- unlike so many other dreams- they are always so vivid and at the time I'm having the dream SO real. In fact, just after I wake up from one of those dreams, I feel like picking up the phone to call my sister to say, "Guess who I just spoke with!" However, my sister is not a Dr. Phil or Oprah fan and yet I always wake up thinking about having spoken to someone we are both attached to. Later, when I return to read what I written about my dream I'm thinking! 'Good Lord! It's a DREAM, Brenda!' Later, I'm always embarrassed that I attached any kind of significance to it, I mean other than to examine what was going on in my psyche at the time, to produce the dream.

 

I always find them amusing. They are funny to me. Sometimes like even during the dream I am finding the WHOLE thing not just quite amusing but WAY over the top. Later, I'm embarassed that I even posted something like that!

 

I believe that our dreams can be signifcant for the things going on in our live. Depending on the dream, I believe that some dreams- like this one- may be there just for entertainment, amusement!

 

Brenda 

 
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July 21, 2008, 9:50 am PDT

I know.....

Quote From: ritehere

Brenda, I still can't get the picture of Dr Phil giggling out of my head. GIGGLING?!

 

Hmm, I wonder if the whole "lounge pants" thing is your version of the naked dream? (Now I'm giggling!)

 

 

In my dream he was laughing a lot, "chuckling" may have been a more appropriate description, I mean in my dream he wasn't teen age girl giggling but he was laughing, A LOT! It was his kind of laugh.

 

Throughout my life I've had dreams where I'm at a social function, laughing and talking and I look down to see that I'm wearing a slip or my night shirt or some other completely inappropriate garb. Before I retired, my friends and co-workers would sit and chat about things like this. It was a couple of years into my friendship with one of the RN's, who was VERY amusing and QUITE creative. She had this amazing wit. Everyone adored her.(She was the one who came up with the idea for the refigerator stunt when Gandhi, Monica Lewinsky and Mother Therasa had food in the staff fridge, after we were done. And the guy who felt from the sky creating the eye for that massive bird drawn in the desert,  the one that you can only see fully from the sky.) Well, she and I had a long discussion about dreams and what they meant. I didn't even know that dreams like that could symbolize Deep-Seated Inseurity! I don't really know if I believe that. I do know that when I heard that, I reacted like someone had told me that I had an enormous Cock Roach crawling on my psyche!   LOL!

 

Oh, in writing this post I am just now recognizing that I've put you and Marcia in that spot in my heart when I keep all my feelings about good friends!

 

Brenda

 

 

 
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July 21, 2008, 11:20 am PDT

Maybe not so deep-seated....

Quote From: blgspc

In my dream he was laughing a lot, "chuckling" may have been a more appropriate description, I mean in my dream he wasn't teen age girl giggling but he was laughing, A LOT! It was his kind of laugh.

 

Throughout my life I've had dreams where I'm at a social function, laughing and talking and I look down to see that I'm wearing a slip or my night shirt or some other completely inappropriate garb. Before I retired, my friends and co-workers would sit and chat about things like this. It was a couple of years into my friendship with one of the RN's, who was VERY amusing and QUITE creative. She had this amazing wit. Everyone adored her.(She was the one who came up with the idea for the refigerator stunt when Gandhi, Monica Lewinsky and Mother Therasa had food in the staff fridge, after we were done. And the guy who felt from the sky creating the eye for that massive bird drawn in the desert,  the one that you can only see fully from the sky.) Well, she and I had a long discussion about dreams and what they meant. I didn't even know that dreams like that could symbolize Deep-Seated Inseurity! I don't really know if I believe that. I do know that when I heard that, I reacted like someone had told me that I had an enormous Cock Roach crawling on my psyche!   LOL!

 

Oh, in writing this post I am just now recognizing that I've put you and Marcia in that spot in my heart when I keep all my feelings about good friends!

 

Brenda

 

 

I think EVERYBODY has had that dream at one time or another. I find that I have it when I'm lying to myself. It literally means that you are afraid others see the real you. That you are afraid you are transparent. "Naked for the world to see."

When you have this dream as a recurring theme, take notice and look at yourself. If it's a rarity, you are pretty normal.

And since you were there clothed, albeit in clothing you thought inappropriate for the occasion, I don't think that was the intent of your thoughts. I'm no expert,  I think it was your sub-conscious wish to be on the same footing as Dr Phil and Oprah, in whatever way that you most admire them for. Your pointing out your inappriateness was your dream's way of pointing out that you feel you are not.

Always remember, your dreams are just that:  YOUR dreams. They are made up of YOUR thoughts, opinions, beliefs, attitudes, and actions. It is your sub-conscious mulling over things you ignored or avoided consciously.

It's possible that your sub-conscious uses these two personas as different aspects of your own character.

 
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July 22, 2008, 5:59 am PDT

Congrats on son's job!

Quote From: ritehere

Marcia, keep a peaceful, happy state of mind and it will further your weight loss goals.

I've always known that stress causes me to not only be drawn towards sugary foods and starches, but it causes me to retain weight also.

I keep a weight record, weighing in once a week. I noticed that my weight spiked a couple of weeks ago while I was away from home (at the mercy of other's cooking), and worried about my friend's health after her heart attack and my son's homelessness. There was no internet connection or phone coverage there. I know it's a get-away for them, and I didn't want to keep using their phone to check up on people. it was very stressful. Anyway, I've lost 7lbs over the last 2 weeks just being home and knowing the ones I love are safe and sound again.

By the way, my son got a job last week. He is in much better spirits also.

I know that your son getting a job is a major breakthru!  and I know you're so proud of him. What kind of job did he find?  It's so hard out there to find work ... I hope it's something that he can enjoy.  And good work on releasing the 7#s.  I've permanently lost 14# ... now I only go back to 182.5 ... last year it was 186.5 ... that's major progress for me.

You are so right about the peace-of-mind .. right now, what I'm experiencing is THE LAST TIME.  I don't have any more excuses Linda .. no more reasons for not losing weight and keeping it off.  Over the next few months I'm going to be working thru all the little barriers that have been stopping me because I had to take a time out to work on an area of my life that hasn't been working for a long period of time.  Those reasons no longer exist.  Thanks to SELF MATTERS I'm able to check out my thoughts and work out what's going on.  Then practicing the TRUTHS until they erase the old mindset.

I'm not a couch potato anymore like I once was. Now it's different. 

One of the things that I'm addressing is the "moving" ...  I find that I'm doing little things around the house now.  and then I "feel" uncomfortable.  I've spent over 10 years clinically depressed.  Moving isn't my norm.  So then I pull out Tolle's (THE POWER OF NOW) pyschiatical time reminders and know that in another 6 months, this will be normal.  Then I feel sad because of the loss of my old ways. 

AND I know that this is going to happen ... has been happening .. I see it as a time of letting go.  I know my words sound sad and depressing .. but I'm not .. it's just that it requires me to stand up and keep reminding myself that in 6 months it will be easier, it will no longer feel like this. 

I've never found a name for what I'm experiencing ... many of the books I read are really for people who live close to normal lives.  You know, they can cook, clean, be in relationships. Me, I've have had to teach myself this.  I've never known such peace and sometimes it frightens me that in a year's time ... I'll never again be here .. that next year will be so totally different .. as it has been since I picked up Dr. Phil's WEIGHT LOSS SOLUTIONS.  I'm so thankful I caught that show and that I committed 100% .. not 10% or 50% or even 99%  .. but 100%. 


 
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July 22, 2008, 6:02 am PDT

No I don't

Quote From: ritehere

I suppose this says something about me doesn't it? I find I'm drawn towards the idea of choosing names for myself pertaining to the different boards I visit.

Does it mean I'm not satisfied with my own name? Or that I crave a different persona?

could be....

For me, it was choosing to say who I am .. to not remain silent.

You choose names that reflect that area of your life that you're in at the moment.  It's like how I name a bunch of feelings / thoughts / actions ... like DOWNSHIFT or CATCH UP.  I simply have memorized their definition and use it to help me to move out of a particular life pattern.

and I think we all crave different persona's  ... especially in our dreams.
 

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