Topic : 06/03 Virtual Chaos

  I have no reason to be angry, nor do I even know anyone with a problem such as this.  If you find me condescending, then so be it. After watching the program and how a grown man couldn't even hold down a job because of this was ridiculous in my opinion. My husband has worked anywhere from 80 to 100 hours a week for 40 years and takes care of his responsibilities like a mature man. He also sleeps in our bed at night where a husband belongs.

  What grown married woman would want to be married to a man (and I use the term "man" loosely) who acts like another child instead of a partner? Excuse me if you can't understand where I'm coming from but watching that show and the husband's behavior was unbelievable. I was aware that there are men out there who are addicted to porn sites and gambling, but gaming is a new one for me. To me it is a very childish and selfish behavior.

  As a matter of fact, I would have been too embarrassed to even go before millions of people and reveal that I'm married to a game addict. I have strong beliefs that when you grow up and become an adult, are old enough to get married and have children, then you need to act like an adult and take care of your responsibilities. So again, no, I am not angry. I'm actually married to a real grown up! And BTW, my husband watched this with me and found it as ludicrous as I did.

You have a point. I think that when a hobby starts causing physical health problems; it's an addiction. It would depend on the person's responsibilities and schedule.

Yeah, that makes sense and I believe monitoring young children is a big part of learning how to control your urges to game excessively.  Truly, all in moderation.

I am now 27.  I am a self proclaimed gamer.  I have enjoyed games since I was about 5 years old.  Although I do play a lot of games, I do not consider myself addicted as on the show because I never let it interfere with my real life.  I am very much an introvert, and frankly I am very nervous meeting new people, and often cannot do so on my own in real life.  I don't blame video games for this.  I was bullied a lot and made fun of a lot in elementary and middle school, as well as some going into my freshman year of high school.  If anything is to cause my lack of social skills, those are the most likely canidates.  I do have some friends whom I was introduced to in high school and whom I am still friends with to this day.  Yet to find a time when many of us are available to hang out and have fun together with varying work schedules is rare.

As far as playing outside, I couldn't do so very much as my allergies made me miserable.  Thankfully I am not deathly allergic to anything, but when I'm allergic to so many things outdoors, such as grass, it's hard to enjoy it.  I am not big into sports, the one that I did enjoy playing was baseball.  But after I outgrew the little league teams, I didn't have the skill to continue playing on the higher teams or in high school, and there aren't any teams around here that play just for fun, so that is pretty much out.

I could do things like whatch TV, or other indoor activities that can be done.  But watching TV is extremelly passive and I will get bored after a few hours and fall asleep.  I need an activity that keeps my mind more active.

So yes, for mainly those two reasons above, I spend a lot of time playing games.  I have also played many of the MMORPG games (Everquest 1 and 2, World of Warcraft, Vanguard, City of Heroes) and I still can easilly prioritize my life.  I never let it interfere with my collage work, and those rare times about once to twice a week that my friends are available to do something, I  go out to do something together with them, even if its just meet up for dinner or a movie and chat.  I even helped a friend move a week ago, which I could see most pefering to play a game then do that.

My point is, I know I have some issues with my life, but it isn't the game's fault.  I do have anger problems, always have before games, and I imagine will most likely have that my whole life.  My dad has some anger problems and he doesn't play video games (and some indicate, although I don't know how true it is, that anger problems can be partially genetic). Like him I have learned to at last hold that temperment back when other people annoy me (and luckilly noone has ever actually tried to test my limits on that) so that I can handle most minor annoyance and such that are obviously unintentional or done in jest.  I still can burst out in anger from frustration against machines, whether I am having a continually difficult time getting passed a challenge in a game, or whether the computer crashed and I just lost a good portion of my reasearch paper for college.  As far as the first, it is enevitable as there will be difficult obsticles in games, but for me the fun is when I do overcome those obsticles, as there is no fun for me in just being handed something without figuring my own way through the problem.

As far as the remark that online friends aren't real, I have to say different.  There are a handful of people online whom I do consider good friends.  Some I met in game, others I met online elsewhere.  I find meeting people oniline much easier for me as I don't have the anxiety that I do in person, and the time or two that a real life meting did eventually occur (and I always took the proper precautons for such), I wasn't as anxious because I did already know them to some extent.  The majority of people on the net and in online games are not liars and people just trying to take avantage of you.

I find that games based on player versus player interaction is where you wiill see more of the jerks in games.  It isn't due to the game, but just the competition is bound to bring out the worst in some people.  Just the same how losing a competitive basketball game can bring out the worse in some people.  There are people who seem to want to prove that they are better at a game then others and rub it in their face. Although these jerks are still a minority, they can often be the most vocally heard of the player base.  The plus side to player versus player interaction is that you do often get a tougher opponent than a computer controlled opponent.  In same games the computer Artificial Intelligence can become quite predictable.

On the other side, many games can also be quite good.  A few days ago I logged into Everquest 2, and rather then spending time actually playing the game, my charcter just stood there while I was involved with an intellectual discussion about politics and then science.  I actually enjoy such topics when the conversation doesn't degrade into a name calling session, yet in most cases politics and religeon are considered "politically incorrect" subjects to discuss in public, and most times when i'm around people the topic goes to subjects that I could care less about (sports, movie stars, muscicians/famous rock bands, etc.).

In same cases the MMO community I find, from personal experience, is better that the first person shooter community and other online communities based on player versus player games because of the reason stated in the second to last paragraph.  Many MMO games are considered player versis enviornment because you team up with other players to fight against computer controlled opponents.  Although you can find competive reasons in this type of gameplay, such as who hs the best stats or such, the game play itself is usually mostly cooperative.  The exception is that many games have one or two (usually a small ammount) of server's dedicated to a more player versus player environment.  the main exception is World of Warcraft which is built more on a player versus player structure.  Although there are still less player versus player servers in World of Warcraft, even in the non player versus player servers, you'll stll find some situations where you still may have to engage in such to complete certain objectives, although it is optional.

I know my post is long, and hopefully the information I provided as well as the background of my own life will help people understand this topic better.  I know I play a lot more then most people, and I gave my reasons above.  In closing I do agree with many that posted similar views that it isn't the game's fault, nor the developer's fault, that a person becomes addicted.  I do think that most who do are trying to fill a voi in their life, specially if they let it affect their responsibilities.  Unlike drugs, this is not a physial addiction, it is a purelly mental addiction.

My son (13) as well has a very mild case of Asperger's.  But non the less his repetitive habits can drive us all a bit mad at times... He has a great deal of difficulty completing chores and required tasks at home and so I have set up a system or rewards of sorts to allow him the time he wants to game (WOW) and to get what I need done as well...  I actually encouraged him to play WOW as it has done a tremendous job at teaching him to read better...  there are a lot of repetitive tasks to complete in the game and achievements to gain, all of which require many very intelligent skills, and all of which help him with developing skills to help him with his school work...  I can not say enough good about this game ...  But I think the other thing that I did that was important, is I have also played the game!  I know where and what my kids are doing...  earning the right to play for four hours on the weekend, is a huge acomplishiment for my son... and he has better expectations for himself and plans his time wisely while in the game as well to complete tasks he wants to do...  Like anything is life moderation is the key... 

The arrogance of you people.
I cannot believe you just toss aside video games like some type of drug.
To Doctor Phil also, You claimed that "Video Games Are For Losers"?
It has been scientificly proven that people who play video games are smarter than the average person, Because they are constantly thinking and persuing their way to the goal.
Even surgens are using video games as a way to help themselves become more capable for sergery.
Doctors are using the new Nintendo Wii to help people with wieght loss, and exercising.
Just because a couple people have no self control and get addicted to video games doesn't mean everyone who plays them does.
I know a very close friend of mine who has been playing games since pong, and his life has never been better, actually he is one of the happiest people I've ever met.
I myself have been playing since NES, And don't remember 1 time my life was ruined because of it.
Your ignorance upsets in the matter, To have no prior experience, no years of fun and making friends through tournaments, an all night party playing online on a weekend.
Video gaming has become a sport, Major League Gaming which can be considered a career.
I know for a fact you have insulted thousands of people who find video games as a fun relief, or an exciting get away from work, or a fun time with friends.
To have played games for these years and than to be called a loser by some egotistical, Ignorant and arrogant person is apauling.
And I say egotistical because you are a hypocrite. You talk about helping people and telling them to "Get Real", But what right do you have to tell people to get real when you need to get real first. You talk about helping people, but for every 1 person you "help" Many more are hurt. You do it for money nothing else.
Many people that play video games are being kept safe from joining gangs and doing drugs, which lays in everyday life by staying home inside.
Before you start complaining and worrying about little things like games, Concentrate on the important things, Like the war, or the gangs, or drugs.
Until these things are gone, video games should be the last of your worries.

I have dumped several boyfriends over video games.  I don't have time for that stuff. - If it doesn't make money it doesn't make cents ;)   Video games are a waist of time and lame excuse.  Parents :  stop spoiling your kids.  Children are not raised with enough responcibilities.  If i told my mom i was going to play a video game or sit in front of a computer for a few hours, MY mother would say " is your room clean, is this house picked up"?  and our house was messy.  We never had cable or a computer growing up, i had to find constuctive things to do.  That's lacking these days.

Have to call BS on this!  She knew for months there was a problem with him and she did nohthing to intervene.  He sould have been removed from his apartment then taken to a facility for help.  To place a camera in his room and watch his length of time and admitting she knew he was on the computer extensively again confirms that she knew he had problems and also had ample time to seek help.

 

You know I could be watching someone drowing in the ocean.  I could sit there and keep watching risking the chance they could drown or I could do something and get that person help. 

 

Sorry, cannot sympathize with people who want to blame everyone else for their problems.  If Shawn was not capable of resolving the matter on his own, then she fully aware of the problen at hand should have done something.

im a mother of three.  i stay at home at take care of my children while my husband works a full-time job.  Im annoyed that i missed this show, i was out of town that day and hope that it plays again so that i can see it!!!

 

my husband started the game world of warcraft last september.  he is still playing.  i am alone.  we have no adult conversation, we have nothing to talk about honestly.  he doesnt see why i get so upset. well heres why and then you can tell me if im as wrong as he says i am.

 

on the weekends my husband will sleep till noon, 1pm.  he will then get up and slump around for alittle bit then slowly work his way to the computer, almost like the slower he goes theres a chance i wont see him get there.  then hes on the game wow. on until whenever, 3am maybe, maybe only midnight or 11pm, maybe only till 9pm.  its like that all weekend.  his excuse for not doing anything with us on the weekends is there isnt any money and hes tired.  through the week, he will come home take a shower most of the time not take a shower and then get on the game.  he will sit there till 9-10pm then get off to go to bed for work the next day.  if he does happen to be off the game and on the couch he is sleeping.  he will sleep anywhere from 5-6 and on till work the next morning.  he only plays with his kids if i throw a huge fit.  he doesnt see anything wrong with showing our 4 soon to be 5 year old how to play wow.  i do.  my oldest son which is the one soon to be 5 is showing signs of depression.  he wants his father to be involved with his life, but its not happening, it really matters to him what his fathers says and thinks of him.  preschool they are working on pronounciation, and my husband picks on him about the way he talks now.  he doesnt know his children enough to be left alone with them for exstended periods of time, but yet gets mad that i dont leave them with him, he wont watch them.  my youngest boy i have caught in the middle of the  road because his father was to busy playing the game to pay attention to him while i was busy cleaning my truck out.  its my fault that he was in the road. much like its my fault that he sleeps in till 1pm on the weekends.  he gave his kids dinner one night and then continued to play his wow, our oldest doesnt like meatballs and was getting rid of them his own way, which involved throwing them on the floor.  my husband grabs him and takes him to the floor.  convientently he rememebers none of these times.

 

he thinks that i am done, and knows that i am not happy.  when he feels threatened he shows interest, when he doesnt feel that way, he doesnt bother.  he would just rather have me sitting at home on my butt with the kids everyday, than feeling like a human and doing things.  i may be a mother, but i am a women that wants to be wanted, that wants to have someone want to spend time with me.  i want to have fun and be happy.

 

he has lied about getting another game card to continue to play, as well as lied about how he activated it and that he had a free month.  i know that when he buys the new xpansion, our life will be over.  i have begun the countdown. 

 

there may not b a problem playing these games, but there is a problem when you neglect your family that you had no problem creating to play the game.

 

i hate my life as the gamers wife.

I think you're looking at this with a narrowed view and need to open your eyes a bit.  Stop being so biased against video games.  It's a waste of time just like how you say video games are a "waste of time".  Video games are a way to pass time, just like going outside and doing other things.  It's like tv, except more interaction.  At least, that's how I see it.  But I do think you do have a point somewhat, there are things things that come first before gaming, but please just try and look at it from both sides and stop being so biased on gamers.