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Topic : 10/28 Cyber Bullying

Number of Replies: 132
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Created on : Friday, October 24, 2008, 02:49:53 pm
Author : DrPhilBoard1
Bullies love an audience, and there’s no bigger playground than the World Wide Web. Cyber bullies create vulgar MySpace posts to taunt others, or send harassing text messages and threatening e-mails. Dr. Phil tackles this topic head on with his son, Jay, whose new book, Jay McGraw’s Life Strategies for Dealing with Bullies, offers action-oriented plans. Jay recently sat down with a group of teens to get their perspective on cyber bullying -- and they didn’t hold back! Learn what concerns the students the most. Next, 17-year-old Austyn says a close friend turned on her, hacked into her MySpace account and reformatted the page to say that Austyn is a " slut," a “sag” and a “butter face.”  Austyn says she now has a bad reputation at school and shows Dr. Phil producers a typical day in her life. What can the teen do to empower herself? Steve DeWarns, a police officer and founder of Internetchildsafety.net, explains when cyber bullying becomes a crime. Then, is your child capable of intimidating other kids? Jay gives the Dos and Don’ts of reacting to a bully. Plus, meet a teen who fears his future may be ruined after a fake MySpace page was created in his name, and a mother who says her 15-year-old son was bullied to death. Join the discussion.

Find out what happened on the show.

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October 28, 2008, 2:15 pm CDT

lol

This show was stupid actually.
I know some kids go threw alot on myspace and what not. but if bullying starts delete your myspace its that simple. kids say i havent done anything for them to do that to me, BUT THATS A LIE. noone will  just start something for no reason @ all. so before you put kids on the show make sure they are telling the whole story. kids get bullied every day. and it has nothing to do with cyberspace. so if the kids dont wanna be bullied on myspace.dont have a myspace. or either go and edit your settings. delete those ppl from your friends list make your profile set as private, and set your page so that the only people that can message you or anything is the people on your friends list. K THANKS
 
October 28, 2008, 2:15 pm CDT

The term bullying

I think a major problem with "bullying" is the term. When I hear the word bully, or bullying I don't take it serious. It sounds childish, playful and meaningless. I think "bullying" should be referred to as abuse and harassment. We want our kids to make adult choices and take adult responsibility, so let's refer to their actions with adult terms. Maybe describing these horrible actions with more serious terms such as abuse, and harassment will make people take it more seriously. I've never heard someone get in trouble for bullying, or get arrested for "bullying" but I have heard of people getting into a lot of trouble and arrested for abuse, and harassment. Words like abuse and harassment carry negative connotations, and carry the meaning that discipline and consequences will follow. Bullying has no real connotations, and just sounds silly, therefore taking the seriousness away.
 
October 28, 2008, 2:15 pm CDT

10/28 Cyber Bullying

Quote From: passionlori

It's not that simple!!!!!! Anyone can make a myspace page or facebook page claiming to be someone else and post whatever they wish. You have no control over that!!!!!!!!!!
You may not have control over them originating the post, but you do have control on calling the police and reporting this as a crime.  Not only is this Cyber bullying, but it is also CYBER STALKING!!  Don't just stand there, do something about it.  If enough people get in trouble for doing these childish things, maybe it will teach others that it is not funny when they do this kind of stuff and that there are repercussions for their actions!
 
October 28, 2008, 2:26 pm CDT

10/28 Cyber Bullying

Quote From: katskradle

...to an extent. Yes parents need to be more responsible and teach their kids to be responsible members of society. But there are some things parents might not have any knowledge of, such as how social networking sites and instant messengers work. There are a lot of older people who know next to nothing about computers and the internet. I'm not making excuses for these people (as responsible parents they SHOULD make an effort to learn more so that they can parent their kids accordingly) but the schools should help too. Schools have computer courses, and teach kids how to do all kinds of things with the internet, but I don't think they emphasize responsible and ethical internet use and that should definitely be part of the curriculum as far as technology courses are concerned. That would be like showing a kid in shop class how to turn on and operate a power tool but not mention any related safety precautions. Safety training is mandatory in classes like shop class, so why not something similar in computer classes?

CHILDREN CANT LEARN RESPECT WHEN IT ISNT TAUGHT TO THEM. BULLYING ISNT JUST DONE BY KIDS. HOW ABOUT WHEN YOU HAVE TEACHERS AND PRINIPLES BULLYING KIDS AND YOU CANT DO ANYTHING ABOUT IT BECAUSE THEY ALL STICK TOGETHER!! THEY CALL YOUR CHILD A LIAR WHEN HE TRIES TO GO TO THEM FOR HELP. THEY THREATEN THEM WITH "BE GLAD IM NOT DEALING WITH YOU,"GIVE YOUR KID DENTENTION FOR BEING A KID AND CONSTANTLY THREATENING SUSPENSION. THESE ARE A AND B STUDENTS. DOES ANYONE SEE ANYTHING WRONG WITH THIS?!!.  I ADMIT THESE KIDS ARE NOT PERFECT BUT THEY ARE NOT TROUBLE MAKERS EITHER.
 
October 28, 2008, 2:35 pm CDT

10/28 Cyber Bullying

Quote From: ljhott

   I lost my grandson  due to liek. on Feburday 20,  2007 and recieved  phone call from a friend a month ago that  ask me did I know my grandson Corey Winters (age 9 went he passed away) had a myspace page . I went to it and was really hurt and so was my daughter  to read what someone wrote and made a profile acting like him!  I contract myspace to remove it and told we didnt give permission for someone to do this ! They e-mail back saying they needed the death cert. or obitr. so i went online and send them a copy  of the oditr. but they e-mail me back  saying that wasnt good enought needed a real copy! We are hurt enought  by it  and we have all his papers in a lock box that I dont  want to unlock just to show myspace. Why cant  they go to Corey Winters profile and see  that at the end of the letter its said he passed away and how  can someone write and tell them the day they passed away plus he was only  9 !!!!!!!!!!! So this really hurt  our family and myspace only made is worst!
I AM SO VERY SORRY FOR YOUR LOSS.
 
October 28, 2008, 2:37 pm CDT

Bullying in schools

My daughter is 5.  She is in kindergarden this year and has been bullied.  These days it seems to be starting way too early.  She is the most caring, sweet, kind, respectful child and I do not understand how this could happen to her.  Her self esteem is definatley at stake.  She is very self concious and at her age, that is disturbing.  These bullies need to be sat down at home and at school and told the consequences of their actions.  If not, they will just keep on because they get some self satisfaction out of it.  I went to the teacher about it, and she sent my child to the counselor.  The teacher even sat my daughter down and talked to her about it too.  Her teacher explained for her to come to her when the bullying is happening so she can take care of it.  It has only been a week since, but so far so good with the bullying.  It has not happened again, Thank God!  The only thing that I can count on is prayers. 

 

 I tell my daughter every morning while I am dropping her off at school how pretty she is, to have a wonderful day, and that I love her.  And as she walks away from me waving and blowing kisses it brings a smile on my face because she is such a beautiful girl inside and out.  And I pray as I let her go that He will take care of my little angel!  And he does!

 
October 28, 2008, 2:38 pm CDT

Bullying Hurts

When I was going to public school from 1956 to 1958 and in grades 6 to 8, I had to run for it the minute school let out. In the winter I would put on my boots and grab my lunch pail, book bag, coat etc and run out the door. As I ran I would put on my clothes.

 

There was one occasion that the boys came onto our property and one of the boys was so mad at my mom because she blocked his way into the house that he bit her in the upper arm. She had a scar for the rest of her life.

 

When I asked the group that was involved in later years why they did it they looked at me as if I was stupid. They had no idea why they did it, or they refused to admit it. Some of them still have a hard time looking me in the eye, and we are all grown ups.

 

Parents need to admit that their kids can and do bully. The neighbours whose sons came on our property came to complain because we took out some hoses and chased them off our property. Later still, my son got the brunt of all of this because he was my child. We had neighbours who were related or actually part of the bullying I faced, and their children got my son into trouble at school. So much so that he had to be placed in a different school altogether than the ones that did that to him.

 

I wish the people who dish out the abuse, cause that is what bullying is, would have someone do it to them just once and maybe they would know how it hurts.

 
October 28, 2008, 2:49 pm CDT

10/28 Cyber Bullying

Quote From: angel1127

Maybe if they were in fact liable for damages there would be less of this happening.

I am the mom of the teenage boy, and I agree they shoud be held accountable.  The only safe and secure network for children is www.safewave.org

 
October 28, 2008, 2:50 pm CDT

EXPERIENCE WITH CYBERBULLYING

This is a major problem in middle school also. My child under my supervision wanted a Myspace
to connect to friends at school.  We began in May 2008 a Myspace page together, I think that this was
going to be a positive way to connect with friends and get to know new friends. First the worst thing is
that we were newbies to Myspace, we were not familar with the settings for privacy etc. Of course as
a young person my child was more interested in the friending of people and adding pictures than the
actual usage of the site.  Since May 2008, my child has been on the receieving end of dirty language,
threats to be beaten up, a link to a spam site which included porn, a target of a classmate who was
gay bashing another classmate, a fake poser myspace where my child had to take a photo to prove
the myspace in question was not actually my child, another fake myspace that was blamed on my
child and a stolen myspace...(because my child had used a friends computer to access myspace),
and the friend stole the password, and stolen photos. The garbage goes on and on and I can not
believe parents have no idea what is going on.  I will not tell them because you heard it on Dr. Phil
"Not My Child". They are all living on the river de nile. I do not believe in giving up because there are
a few decent kids out there, willing to step up.  And you think this has not affected how my
child views other kids? You bet it has! Do you think that I as the parent are looking at these kids as criminals? I do after having to deal with all what is going on with these kids...... The trust is gone.
Please watch your kids, so we do not lose more great kids whose lives end because of cyberbullying!
 
October 28, 2008, 2:57 pm CDT

The hidden bullies

My grand daughter is only 9 years old and she has been secretly bullied. She is a straight "A" student and is loved by all her teachers. She does ballet, aerobic dancing, take music lesson, has performed in several plays in the community.  Recently the new school she is attending has been receiving written bomb threats, written threats of killing teachers. The school has had to evacuate on several occasions.  Letters were sent home to parents stating that they will catch and punish the perpetrator(s). It so turns out that this person was my grand daughter.She was caught on video writing the threat letters.  Turns out that she was threaten by bullies to write these letters or they will beat her up. She was so scared that she just kept writing them so that they will leave her alone.  She has been suspended from school pending a hearing to see if she can return or not. But the irony of the situation is that these bullies are still going to school and nothing has happened to them. The shock wave of this situation has devastated her teachers and family members. This is a child that you would never ever think would do a thing like this. How do we help not only my grand daughter but these bullies. Where do we as parents of good kids turn to.  How do we help her heal and get her back into school that she loves so much. She is an achiever and I hope that this won't set her astray.  Where can I get some help for her.  The bullies are not coming forward. But her friends know who they are and are not afraid to come forward.  She is still afraid that they will come after her.

She is in the 4th grade and the bullies are in the 5th. It all began when my grand daughter and her friends were standing near a tree that the bullies carved their names into. They didn't want anyone near "their tree". 

 
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