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Topic : 06/06 "I'm Gay, OK?"

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Created on : Friday, October 14, 2005, 03:56:41 pm

Author : DrPhilBoard1

(Original Air Date: 10/19/05) Sexual orientation used to be something kept hidden from family and co-workers, but now more and more people are "coming out" and finding acceptance. Anjela says her mother and sister don't support her sexual orientation, and feel she can't be Christian and gay at the same time. Can they reconcile this touchy issue? Then, two men debate whether a person can go from gay to straight, and parents of a 4-year-old boy fear their son's desire to play with dolls and wear heels means he'll grow up to be gay. Are they overreacting to his wishes to be a princess instead of a prince? Talk about gender and gay issues here.

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tntreefrog

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October 20, 2005, 9:04 pm PDT

10/19 "I'm Gay, OK?"

I am not homosexual, but my best friend and "soul brother" is and let me tell you, NO ONE would choose to go through all he goes through. I have talked to him openly and without boundries about EVERYTHING under the sun and I believe I am educated about his experience. There was never a choice in sexuality. NEVER!! If there was a choice, why would he choose to be denied a wedding celebrated by the majority of his close family? Why would he choose a life that opens him up to public ridicule? We have literally been in a restaurant having dinner and talking quietly between ourselves and four people at the table directly behind us made fun of him so loudly the hostess on the other side of the large dining room apologized to us on our way out. Why would he choose a lifestyle that so many people in the general population feel justified to pass judgement on? People who have known him less than a week openly say "you know you are wrong to be gay and you will burn in hell." Why would he choose a lifestyle that opens him up to being beaten to death for holding hands in the park? If you haven't walked a mile or two in someone's shoes (whether through first hand experience or truly listening to someone who has first hand experiece) don't be so sure of what you think you know for sure. Learn tolerance. Learn to live and let live. Learn that we are all people with the same agenda, and that is to be happy and healthy and loved. Understand that words you throw hurt more than you may realize. To quote the sweetest person on earth, Tammy Faye Mesner, "We're all made out of the same old dirt, and God didn't make no junk!" ;)

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rlanthier

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October 20, 2005, 9:41 pm PDT

if only

Quote From: poetry47

Homosexuality is a choice. It is possible you were born with the choice to make a decision, because Gods word tells us that, but to try to pass off your personal beliefs as a developmental function during the birth process is wrong. I do not claim to judge homosexuality, but I do claim to know the trueth and strive daily to pursue a right relationship with God.

Your personal beliefs are just that; personal. They are between you and God, because I already know the trueth. I do not need a defence for living right; all I need is Gods hand directing me along my path and a hope that everything will be okay.

And thier is an argumnet that can be fought if you consider that the Bible clearly states that a husband and wife are to become one flesh once they are married. It does not anywhere; where I read brings homosexuality into marriage. It also convey in the begining of the Bible that as the womans part in the relationship she is to multipy the families size. Same sex relationships can not mutiply through the natural process of sex created and intended for a female and male companionship. Why did God create Eve for Adam? She was to be his companion. His wife. To bare Adams children. If same sex relationships were okay then God would have given Adam another man to partener with, but instead he gives woman and later he destroys a city built on homosexuality.

It is my personal belief that Gods word instructs us how to live and I have made the choice to live my life in Christ. You belief as you do. That is your personal belief. Right or wrong. Do not judge those that are dedicated to chosing thier own beliefs.

I have read several of the messages posted on the board and I can understand both sides of this issue, because I have a cousin that lives as a christrian, but uses the excuse that she was born with homosexuality. I can love my cousin, but I do not have to accept the lifestyle she has choosen to live. I do not have to surround myself or my daughter around that kind of behavior, but I can love her and I can pray for her and I can know the trueth and not allow it to affect my relationship with my cousin. She understands my beliefs and she tries to be considerate of that by not flaunting her personal beliefs around my impressionable child. Expressing who we are no matter who we are takes consideration and respect.

If only sexual attraction were a choice. We could 'choose' to be attracted to anybody, depending on their availability, and other more practical factors. Even heterosexuals could decide to be attracted to partners that would ordinarily not be considered attractive- the disfigured, the grossly obese etc..

I could choose to find broccoli delicious - which I despise. In fact I could to find all the healthy things delicious and none of the unhealthy foods. But unfortunately that's not how desires and attraction work.

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april_lk

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October 20, 2005, 9:42 pm PDT

10/19 "I'm Gay, OK?"

Quote From: appsas

How in the world do you personally know that it's a choice? I know what the Bible says, but that still doesn't mean that people could not be born this way. I agree with you that sex should be between man and woman ... no argument there. I also am completely aware of the whole story of Adam and Eve. I'm not even saying that I think homosexuality is right ... what I'm saying is that with all of the million of developmental issues that occur in-utero, why can't this be one of them? I have had many heart to heart conversations with gay friends about this issue, and they all tell me they have felt that something was different from a very young age. These people come from good homes, no abuse or trauma, etc. It's okay to not agree with homosexuality and ALSO say ... I just don't know for sure if it's a choice ... because really, none of us knows for sure!!!

Oh yeah? How do you know what God wants? can I come alone the next time you two have a sit down?

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april_lk

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October 20, 2005, 9:59 pm PDT

10/19 "I'm Gay, OK?"

Quote From: riviera

I think being gay is genetic but not a good thing. I don't think it is normal or should ever be considered normal but a biological defect like mental illness. As so many people say they wouldn't choose it .

A lot of people have experimented with bi-sexuality in their youth thinking gay sex is ok.

I think if you are gay "that's nice" but I really don't care what you do in private. I would like to know why so many married men go to parks to pay for sex with underage boys/

I would like to know why so many heterosexual marriages fail, why the divorce rate is over 50%, why so many heterosexual men prey on young girls, why they rape them and kill them. Why do heterosexuals do that?

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unpocoloco

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October 20, 2005, 10:06 pm PDT

Refutation

Quote From: holyunion

Let's not forget that the Bible was used to deny women the right to vote, to support slavery and look what "good and decent Christians" did to our Native Americans in the name of Christianity.

Homosexuality, I believe, is a test made by God for all those "christians" on THE primary commandment and fundamental basis of ALL religions...to love one another as thyself. To say, I love everyone BUT....negates everything you just said. There is a pyamaid of hate and the bottom levels starts with the unacceptable and name calling and escalates to the violence and murder of innocent people. Seriously think about what you are saying when you say... I love everyone but don't talk about it. It's okay if I'm straight, and talk about my dating life, or children or husband but you can't say a word about your life. Would you want to go to work and live your life in silence? I think not.

I'm okay in the eyes of God, loved and accepted for who I am...a lesbian, newly "married" to a wonderful woman, active in MY church and my community.

Let us not forget that the Bible was MIS-used to deny women the vote, to support slavery, and for that matter, justifying a whole host of ungodly acts (why didn't you include the Crusades, while you were at it?). Just because mis-guided people of the past misinterpreted the Bible to support their various agendas does NOT negate the Truth of God's Word nor its demands upon our lives and behaviors and relationships.

Secondly, Christianity and it's foundation, Judaism, are the ONLY world religions whose operating principle is to love others as we love ourselves. That is a direct quote from Jesus Christ Who was defining the most important of the laws found in the Jewish Torah and NO other founder of ANY world religion or ANY other so-called "holy book" for any of those religions says anything remotely like it.

I'm fed up with people, gay or Christian, equating the Bible's stand on homosexuality with hared and intolerance. Does God hate homosexuals? Absolutely NOT! Are His followers commanded to hate them? Not even close! Is the Bible intolerant of ALL types of sinful behavior, homosexuality included? You bet!

You are indeed loved and accepted by God as you are. He also loves you way too much to allow you to remain in that sinful lifestyle unchallenged. And your religious works won't save you, just like the religious works of adulterers, murderers, and other won't save them.

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april_lk

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October 20, 2005, 10:07 pm PDT

10/19 "I'm Gay, OK?"

Quote From: irishmom

The Bible CLEARLY states that homosexuality is a sin. However, the Bible also clearly states that we should love EVERYONE, as does Jesus. There were many people in Biblical times that sinned, but Jesus himself said, "He who is without sin, let him cast the first stone". I do not agree with homosexuality, but I have my own sins to worry about. Who am I to judge another when I walk imperfectly? If one of my children were to come to me and tell me they were gay, I would be very sad for them (for many reasons, not just because of the fact that they are gay, but because it is such a hard lifestyle to live, in part because of all the hatred toward them), but I would LOVE them NO differently. So-called Christians who HATE gays and treat them unkindly are not Christians at all in my opinion.

Those who suffer from mental retardation are going to hell too? They do not love God, they do not repent their sins or pray. They are born with the same defficiency as homosexuals. What a cruel God you worship, bringing life into the world in a certain way then condemning them to hell for being exaclty how you created them.

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brasnic

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October 20, 2005, 10:14 pm PDT

Dizzying responses

Quote From: mommyjenna

No, it would not amaze me at all. I have no doubts you could be a good friend or good person.

This is not about hate, as much as you all want to make it out to be.

It's about love. Love for God and his commandments. I don't know why he doesn't want people acting out on homosexuality but I'm not going to say 'go ahead, you have God's blessing' when He didn't condone it ?

How does everyone else condone this? Do you all know better than God?

And if it's about love....as you say it is, how do you know that I don't love God? If it hadn't been for my faith in God, I would have never had the stength to live my life as I was made to do.I sincerely don

't believe that God wants us to live our lives in a constant lie. If I had remained closeted, I would be living a lie. Not all of us (and I mean straight people too) choose to have children. Does that mean that we don't love God? Heavens no. I believe that alot of people in the very country shouldn't have children. And what about all of us that don't believe in the 10 Commandments? I am a Buddhist student and much as I don't denounce someone for believing what they do and practicing the faith of their choice, I choose to believe differently. Does that make me a bad person? No. Believing in God is a choice, one I choose to make, because I "feel" that He is real and He exists in my mind and heart. My love for myself and my partner is real because I "feel" it and I believe that it also exists in my mind and my heart.

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unpocoloco

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October 21, 2005, 2:26 am PDT

because she is 100% right

Quote From: nikki_pvn

How can a " thinking person " even compare these things?!

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rlanthier

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October 21, 2005, 3:52 am PDT

The Bible clearly states

Whatever is clear in the Bible, it is not that homosexuality is a sin.

Jesus himself did not condemn it which, considering the fiery condemnations it is given by self-proclaimed Bible Christians, is very unclear.

In the New Testament the only reference is Romans I which I have explained elsewhere referes to heterosexual men, not homosexuals.

The famous passages from Leviticus are notoriously ambiguous and have given rise to multiple translations.

Leviticus 18:22 & 20:13 appears to condemn male homosexual behavior, but in fact only refers to temple prostitution. Even if it did refer to lesbian and gay relationships, it would not be applicable to Christians today, any more than are the other 613 laws which make up the Jewish Holiness Code. It is less than genuine for a Christian teleminister or theologian to imply that these verses are still valid for the beliefs and conduct of Christians, while stating that the remaining laws of the Holiness Code are not applicable.

Be very careful when accepting your translations as 'clear' and definitive. Bible scholars are not so clearly in agreement.

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thesmitty

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October 21, 2005, 4:31 am PDT

10/19 "I'm Gay, OK?"

I think all you "Christians" need to be quiet. If you honestly thing that Gays are going to hell then let God deal with it. Don't judge them...I thought that was what God was supposed to do. God said it himself that Man is wicked. Thus far that has proven to be true. If someone wants to make love to a person of the same sex than that's their business.

You talk about the commandments. You're so righteous? Which one of you has never sinned in his life. Men are sinners. We are expected to fail. Only hope that God will forgive you when the time comes.

You may not think of what you're doing as "Hate" but other's do. I think you should show some respect to these people...gay or not. Maybe people are unwilling to actually LISTEN to the word of God instead of taking things and hearing what they want to hear.

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