Topic : 10/31 "Spoiled and Entitled?"

I'm not a big supporter of giving children commercial stuff for rewards or comfort.  That is no better than giving them candy.  It teaches them to reward themselves that way and that can become unhealthy.  

Our rewards are things like being able to choose the after dinner game we all play or allowing them some time on their xbox (that they saved up for).  If I give them stuff, I am interfering with my own plan of having them learn how to budget and choose things that they want. 

As a teenager myself, I felt this show to be sooo wonderful! I've worked for the past 6 years to horseback ride, I still do and I'm almost 18 years old! My family is not wealthy and I don't even have a horse. I ride horses that were given to a 14 or 15 year old because that is what they wanted and as soon as they had it they didn't want it anymore. I get so peeved when I go to a barn and see "barn brats" as I call them running around the barn in they're designer clothes not wanting to get dirty. . .it's a barn you get dirty. I just can't believe that parents don't know that they spoil their children! 

~Amanda 

For you parents who are giving their children everything they want: You are doing them no favors.  You are not teaching them that material possessions won't get them through a crisis.   

You are not teaching them how to cope when they move out into the "big bad world".  Do you think their bosses are going to just give them what they want in salary or a promotion without earning it? 

For the first 2 years of a child's life , if the money spent on presents was put into a savings fund of some type, the compound interest over the next 18 years would pay for their education.  Wrap up a cardboard box and let them use their imaginations.  Kids don't care about what's in the box anyway.  Some of the best childhood memories I have was knowing that Spring had arrived when the local furniture store owner would call my mom (it was a small town) and tell her that his shipment of refrigerators had arrived.  My older brother would trot across town, bring home two boxes and he and my mom would cut a door and window and we would make curtains for our play houses.  If we wanted new clothes for our dolls, we made them.  We made our own clothes and that satisfication of knowing we had created something that was well down was worth more and created lifelong memories than going to a store and buying something that was boring after a couple of times.   

Limit Christmas and birthday presents to 3 items they truly want.  Make them decide what is most important.  And if they don't play with those items on a regular basis, make them given the toys to charity.   

Children today don't know the value of self-satisfaction of working and earning their material possessions, and we are creating a monster for the next generation.   

How many kids of this generation would survive if there was a repeat of the Great Depression of 1929-1945?  They wouldn't because they don't know what it is like to do without and be creative in problem solving.   

Parents - are you raising children or future adults?  If your answer is "children", then you need to rethink your path.   

And the mother who thought her daughter's spending wasn't a problem, and that her daughter would automatically learn to balance her checkbook , pay bills and control her spending needs help herself.  If you don't teach them, how will they know? 

Wake up America. 

I know someone who is a college student, bought a dirt bike he never uses, wants to buy a pool table, and at the mention of my espresso maker, immediately went on Ebay and bought one too.  Is this normal?????  and he has a wine making kit, and he has a dvd player in his truck, underglo lights...he buys things in excess that he is never going to use! 

I know when my kids where teenagers that I gave them a budget every semester to buy new clothes. My daughter would buy less expesive items to have more and my son who was a skateboarder would use his entire budget to get two pairs of pant, two shirts and one pair of shoes. I left the choice up to them. It was simple - here is how much money I can afford and I believe is sufficient - you live with your choices., if you want more - get a job. I started this when they were around 12 and 14 because I could see that things could easily get out of control. The flip side of their choices is that my daughter bought more items and cared for them less and my son who chose to go with limited but name brand items, really took care of them.  However it turned out it was a good way to encourage them to work within a budget and learn to live with their decisions. Its amazing how much more price comparing they do when they know they have a given amount to work with. It has to be a reasonable amount that is not too little and not too much and we based it on about 10% of one months of mine and my husbands combined income and gave each child that amount at the beginning of each semester that was for clothes.