Topic : 10/31 "Spoiled and Entitled?"

I have the exact problem with my daughter, who will soon be 18.  She's an only child and we don't have much family that we can count on except us.  (My husband, daughter and me).  We too have spoiled our daughter, buying her most everything she wants.  We have always been able to give her everything.  Her father has always told her "your only job is school".  She has done well, not exceptional but  very well.  I worry all the time that she will always have to depend on someone, either us as her parents or find someone rich.  I have preached to her that we will not always be there to support her.  She has to learn the value of a dollar, earn her own money, and make it on her own.  She has no concept of what it takes to do this.  I just don't know if or when she will ever learn this.  Any suggestions? 

Thanks for covering an important subject.  Another consideration is that what you do with what you have may be actually more important to learning and development.  If you have toys and play with them, then want something different, perhaps the toy doesn't even have any intrinsic learning value.  An example might  be simple blocks where a child can play with them and create new games with nothing else needed.   

This really heads into issues with learning as well. The first child in the family is statistically the better reader.  The second child perhaps has less one on one time with the parents, but they generally have more books.  Thus another reason is that the first child read the same books over and over(it is about 14 books on average).  The second child gets those plus a few more with a average of almost 30 books thus has less repeatability with them.   

I would love to see your program lead into child development and how a few toys can be strategically used to help provide a learning environment for the child.  This is in opposition to just having things.  This would likely give the opportunity for new parents to see that the value isn't in how many toys you have, but how you use them and interact with those around you(parents included).  Thanks! 

It would seem that most people were "put off" by the first mom on today's show. It was her demeanor, I'm sure. What was y'all's take on her? Did you think she thought she was better than everyone else? Her comment that her sisters were "jealous" b/c she could give her kids things that her sister couldn't give her own got me. Why is it that whenever we disagree with someone, or don't like the way they do things, we're "jealous"? I know of someone that lives in a monstrosity of a house...trust me, the thing is almost as big as the Taj Mahal. It's hideous, proving that money doesn't buy class or good taste. When talking about this house, if the person who lives there heard me, they would probably conclude that I'm "jealous". I have nothing good to say about the house. Jealous is the last thing I am...I wouldn't live there. I'd raze the thing and build something nicer. And definitely smaller. The people who built the house are self-made...two brothers who came up with some cell phone idea or something or other. I don't really care. I just don't get someone always saying that someone else is jealous. I wasn't jealous of one single thing about the first guest...and her demeanor suggested that she was bored and considered herself "above" all of the hoopla. Just my take...matters to no one but me..... 

Opinions on the "jealousy" vein?????  

I think that Parker is an ungrateful kid. It is one thing to whine to get things that he wants but it is another thing that he uses his mothers illness to get those things. Really Parker, do you think that she planned on getting sick and not having anymore children just to make you lonely. Give me a break. If you were in my house, you would have a bed and a clock, AND you would be grateful for that. I think that you should take Dr. Phil's advise about using his belongings as currency. Take them all away and give one piece back at a time when he proves that he deserves them. If he is going to act like a small child than treat him like a small child. 

Kids do not need TVs/DVD players in their bedrooms.  What happened to parents encouraging their children to read or play outside?  It makes me wonder if parents who let their kids have TVs in the bedroom can actually read themselves. 

 Will someone please tell me why every parent seems to feel guilty about their kids? "I have to give him things. When he asks, I just feel soooo guilty." And I swear, when these spaghetti-spined wimps say it, they all end the sentence on a whine that escalates upward. ... "I feel soooo guilty."
GET OVER THE GUILT.
The only thing your child is entitled to is your love, support and supplying of basic needs. The wants are something that should be handed out sparingly and then for good behavior.
If you're one of those parents who "feel soooo guilty (whine included)," maybe you ought to look within yourself instead of applying an external materialistic bandage to the problem.
I, for one, am sick of living in a world with spoiled, out-of-control, give-it-to-me-now kids. Ultimately, you're not the one who has to deal with the consequences of your actions now. That job goes to their fellow human beings and every time you shower guilt gifts on your kid, you're doing a disservice to other people's kids years in the future.
If you want something to feel guilty about, try feeling guilty about the defective product (your child)  you're pawning off on the rest of the world.