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Topic : 03/13 Infidelity Aftermath

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Created on : Friday, November 04, 2005, 02:51:01 pm
Author : DrPhilBoard3

(Original Air Date: 11/10/05) Lies, deceit, sex and scandal. Dr. Phil speaks with husbands and wives who've been caught cheating — and are paying the price. Albert and Camille have been married 11 years, but she hasn't been able to trust him since his affair three years ago. Albert admits to cheating, and says he would do it again if he knew he could get away with a "freebie!" Camille is convinced he's still involved with other women, but Albert says he's not cheating. Then, Danielle and Chris were high school sweethearts, but less than three months after getting married, Danielle found herself in the arms of another man. Numerous affairs later, Danielle is pregnant with another man's child. Can these marriages survive this much betrayal?  Join the discussion.

 

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April 30, 2006, 1:28 pm CDT

03/13 Infidelity Aftermath

Quote From: riverlady

Old and lonely like YOU!! sounds like somebody's had a 'few other women in her "lovely" life!"?  What do YOU go to sleep feeling like? Let me guess, Crap because your unattractive and you have a cheating husband? ohhhh thats something to live for huh?  Not myself,  I am really set for life, even in the golden years..and they will be 'gold'en!!! i keep myself up because I know exactly what men love and I will never be old, old because i have a young heart and mind. I use men for just what they are intended for on this earth. everything else I depend on what really counts are my family and friends.  Just a matter of how you look at it I guess. Sorry your so sour on life..ya ought to try to please your husband a little more and not be too opinionated about other peoples lives..

look who is soooo creative with her replies..i remember reading this same reply to someone else..you don't know me...unlike you I can respect myself.  You are the one who wants sympathy for being a HOMEWRECKER. 

 

GET A LIFE AND LEAVE THE POOR WIFES LIVES ALONE..CAN'T HAVE ONE OF YOUR OWN SO YOU HAVE TO TRY TO TAKE THIERS...POOR POOR POOR RIVER RAT 

 
May 2, 2006, 10:17 am CDT

03/13 Infidelity Aftermath

Quote From: nicegirl28

look who is soooo creative with her replies..i remember reading this same reply to someone else..you don't know me...unlike you I can respect myself.  You are the one who wants sympathy for being a HOMEWRECKER. 

 

GET A LIFE AND LEAVE THE POOR WIFES LIVES ALONE..CAN'T HAVE ONE OF YOUR OWN SO YOU HAVE TO TRY TO TAKE THIERS...POOR POOR POOR RIVER RAT 

Tisk, Tisk....Someone should get a life and got off the message boards!!   I think your being too nice, it may get you into trouble!!
 
May 7, 2006, 1:31 pm CDT

Hero or Naive

Quote From: riverlady

Old and lonely like YOU!! sounds like somebody's had a 'few other women in her "lovely" life!"?  What do YOU go to sleep feeling like? Let me guess, Crap because your unattractive and you have a cheating husband? ohhhh thats something to live for huh?  Not myself,  I am really set for life, even in the golden years..and they will be 'gold'en!!! i keep myself up because I know exactly what men love and I will never be old, old because i have a young heart and mind. I use men for just what they are intended for on this earth. everything else I depend on what really counts are my family and friends.  Just a matter of how you look at it I guess. Sorry your so sour on life..ya ought to try to please your husband a little more and not be too opinionated about other peoples lives..

Not all men cheat for the same reason or do they all give you the same ole crap and it just happens to always be the wife's fault as to why they have wondered away and landed into your arms. Have you ever thought that just maybe they find you naive. You're stupid enough to listen to their blame the wife games so for their reward they get you in any way shape and form because you give them the "pity" they need....  

 Should you really feel  so lucky that you get these cheaters? Women like you blame the woman. Men that cheat don't need a reason to cheat so don't give yourself such a great pat on the shoulder and think you're their hero  

 
May 25, 2006, 5:52 am CDT

03/13 Infidelity Aftermath

Quote From: hope1123

How did you get the other woman to openly communicate with you. My husband had an affair back in 1998. I found out about it in November of 2003. I tried to contact the other woman who said she would deny it until she died. I also tried to email her but she did not reply. I've thought of showing up on her doorstep, but I'm afaid of what I might do if I am standing face to face with the slut who (along with my husband) ruined my life. I am trying to get past this affair, but not one day passes that I don't think about it. I chose to let him stay because of the children and because I still love him, but question that decision every day of my life.

What possible good could come from confronting this woman?  

Why have you remained in this marriage? The children is not a good enough response, anymore.  

What are you questioning? If you are still questioning you made the wrong decision. Rectify it now while you are still young and pretty. What does Phil say, "You are burning daylight" and Oprah, "Don't waste the pretty".  

If you have chosen to forgive your husband, forgive him and let it go, otherwise you are living a delusional life filled with pain and heartache and it is just going to get worse from here.  

Leave the woman alone, you can not make her feel sorry for what she has done to you, because she did nothing to you. She did what she did with your husband. He ruined your "life" and you have allowed it to continue.  

I suggest you get right with yourself and your finances. You need to decide to forgive your husband for real or get the hell out while you are still young enough to live happily and fully.

 
September 11, 2006, 4:13 pm CDT

Love it!

Quote From: anothervio

I think its s good idea except dont leave the kids with someone like that, its not fair to them. TAke the kids and go ,leaving the house in a mess.

I like the whole idea, and of course leave the kids, this way he will what it is like with just you gone and he has to take care of everything.... that is a good way to show him how life could be....

 

 
October 31, 2006, 7:45 am CST

Two Sides to a Story!

I would like to see Dr Phil do a show as two why People in a supposedly loving relationship Cheat either physically or emotionaly. We are always ready to bust either the male or the female who does the cheating, but why did that person go outside that marriage in the first place. Did communication break down?,  Did Physical attraction go away, did respect from the other spouse go away or never exist. I do not think most people actually look to cheat. It happens because someone at home is not taking care of the other one. If you have a good relationship, physcially and emotionally I dont think most people would cheat. Lets find out why and stop bashing everyone who cheats. Some are in relationships which need medical attention.
 
September 8, 2008, 2:37 pm CDT

hometown

Quote From: awnree

  

Like a Thief,  that sounds right.  They break in without your knowledge take things you cherish.  Some you can recover some never.  Just like a marriage in trouble thanks to homewreckers. 

  

  

She did the smirk thing or ran and hid in the bathroom when I had to go to the office.  She even had the nerve to show up at his birthday party. I should of known then. I kept telling myself no because she has/had a nice man.  He looks a little like mine.  Lisa Deleray is her name.  Her husband Doug has his own business.He gave her anything she wonted.  She doesn't even care what she has done to him.  On one of my husband little visit to her apt her husband walked in.  I talked to him later he wonted tear mine guy up.  I told him I understand cuz thats how i feel about her.   Even other people in the office lied about what was going on.  I asked straight out and they lied.  WE do have the right to sue the person that is causing the emtional stress,strain to us and our kids.  I have the papers all filled out just have to go to the court now and file them.  I just wonder how many other women well be up for attack with the new job Lisa has.  Its a place that women tell all to the person attending to them.  She needs to find a guy with no bagage/family.  She has enough of her own to deal with and try to exsplain to a new person. 

  

The last 48 hours have been rough. He says, I love you, But the tone is not the same as it once was.  Its so confusing. Theres a fork in the road where I am standing and I don't know which way to go. I am afraid of either direction.  What to do wieghs heavy on me. 

  

  

Talk to you soon. 

  

  

What town are you from?
 
November 20, 2008, 8:18 pm CST

When is enough enough?

I have been married for 35 years.  In the first 7 years of my marriage my hsuband cheated on me twice.  Recently he admitted to having an affair lasting 6 months  which ended13 years ago.  He says he broke it off after 6 months realising it was a mistake and that the woman concerned did not have the value system he admired in me.   He only told me however when a situation arose where he felt he had no choice but admit it.  Otherwise I would never have known.  This was 4 months ago and I am still gutted.  He swears nothing else has happened in the last 13 years and nothing ever will, that he didnt realise the enormity of his actions when he was first married and this last effort has  brought it  home to him about just how wrong this was.  He swears it will never happen again, loves me to death, and is doing everything he as the cheater is supposed to according to the literature.  He has changed...he talks more..is more open and I believe sincerely regrets his actions. He has apologized repeatedly, something he was never able to do erlier in the marriage when this happened, and says he wants to do whatever it takes to make this right, including working through the restoring a marriage after an affair type books.  I however, have deep hurt and betrayal and trust issues never the less. I feel that not only did he betray me for six months, he has in effect lied to me for the last 13 years. It has taken away my good memories of my life and made me wonder why I put so much into this marriage.  What do I do?  I know that past behaviour is a really good indicator of future behaviourso is there really a chance of putting this right or am I dreaming?   The other choice is to leave a comfortable life, and be alone.  I have few friends and no family. 
 
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