I met my x husband climbing in New Hampshire in 1969. I hadn't done much climbing before and chose the wrong boots. The mountain wasn't very high, but by the the time I reached the summit both feet hurt. I removed my boots and socks and all the skin fell off my heels. The leader of the hike helped me bandage my feet but, when we started down, he and the rest of the group took off leaving me behind which is definitely a sin when you're hiking. Only one person stayed with me. The man I eventually married. He stayed, he said, because he wanted to make certain that I got down safely. We seemed to have so much in common. He had majored in History in college; I was a History major. We both loved the out of doors, swimming and hiking. He was going into to Coast Guard, against his parents wishes. This was the Viet Nam era and they wanted him to go to either Canada or Sweden and they said they'd support him and they definitely had the money to do so. He said that he'd told them he couldn't desert his country but he couldn't kill anyone either so he had enlisted in the Coast Guard. I told him how proud I was of his decision. That I admired his compassion for others, his sense of humor and how he was willing to stand up for what he believed. I also told him that I thought he'd found an excellent compromise between his desire to support his country and his beliefs about killing others, especially since his father's family had been missionaries since the 1730s.
After boot camp, he was stationed in Boston and we reconnected through a mutual friend. We were married in 1971. Now, fast forward to 1973. We were backpacking in the Pemmigawasset Wilderness. Both of us were members of the Appalachian Mountain Club and we were doing the finishing off the mountains which made you eligible for the 4,000 Footer Club. Today there are 48 but list has changed since 1973, so I'm not certain which mountains are now on the list and which have been dropped. However, Owl's Head is on both lists and, in 1973, the only way up was to climb an old land slide. While climbing up the slide, I slipped and fell onto my left hip. Did the compassionate man I thought I had married help me up? Are you kidding? The only thing he wanted to know was if I'd damaged the camera equipment. After we'd hiked down, we hiked out towards the Kancamagus Highway. It had been a heavy winter, the snow melt was late and it had been raining off and on for three days. There was a large stream to cross and, while normally it was difficult but not dangerous, this was not a normal crossing. I fell, losing my glasses. Without glasses, I have 4 inches of clear vision. By the time I flounder to the other bank, I was already so hypothermic I couldn't think straight. He did, I admit, help me to get into dry clothes because we always kept extra clothes in waterproof bags but when I asked him to warm up some water,using our stove, so I could get something hot into me, he refused. We hiked to our next camp site. Guess who had to cook supper? The next morning, I woke up to find that my left hip was pitch black, swollen two inches high and I couldn't put my foot on the ground with out screaming. I showed him how badly I was hurt. I begged him to hike out for help. He packed the food, tent, sleeping bags and stove in his backpack and told me to hike out or he'd leave me there. So i did. Actually, I didn't hike out. I hopped out 20 miles without glasses and with a cracked hip.
Everything he had told me about his concern for others, his love of country, was just a con job he pulled out to suck people to him. He lied about loving me. He lied about taking care our of our only child who inherited a rare and fatal genetic disease. When I had to give him custody because I had been disabled by an auto-immune disease, the state he lived removed him from his care after three weeks and placed her in foster care ONLY because I was unable to care for her. The fact that comes from a wealthy family and has provided her with excellent, private care is, in my opinion, the only good thing he's ever done. He claims he loves her but , if he does, then why,when I try to see her, does he sends her on a long trip leaving me to comfort our sobbing daughter when she calls me and says, "Why does he keep doing this to me?" Even his own brother hates him.
He's now on his third marriage. I'd like to let her know the truth about the man she married but I know she won't believe me. I just pray that she finds out what he's really like before he puts her in harms way.
He's been diagnosed as a psychopath with psychotic episodes.
(Original Air Date: 12/12/05) You may have heard, "If something is too good to be true, it probably is." Dr. Phil's guests learned this lesson the hard way. Sandra thought she was marrying a bachelor with whom she would spend the rest of her life. What she didn't know was that she was being conned, and that when she tied the knot, she would be wife number seven! See what happens when Sandra and wife number six get together. Why is Dr. Phil concerned with the way they are coping with their pain? Then, when Coni met Paul, he claimed he owned a business, had a Ph.D. and was an Air Force Major. But the life he detailed was all a big lie. Now that Coni has put her husband behind bars, she fears he's plotting revenge. What does Dr. Phil think? Plus, a former FBI profiler shares the signs to look for so you don't become a con man's next target. Talk about the show here.
