Topic : 03/23 Nasty Custody Battles

Quote From: angelsmuch

What does she get to stay in control of? I agree that there was definetely one shot of the biomoms(Tiffany's) house that looked really bad. I also noticed that all the other shots in other rooms looked clean. That makes me wonder if her house is normally a mess or if there were other things going on that we can't see. It doesn't make somebody a slob if one room is dirty (in my opinion). I also recall Tiffany admitting to not always handling situations in the best way. I didn't feel she was trying to pretend she was perfect. I am both biomom and stepmom and I would never talk to my stepsons mom the way Kimmy admitted to talking to Tiffany.  

I would agree with you all on the lying if Tiffany had not let Scott see the boys at all. I think that her first instinct was to say the boys were not there but she rethought that and let Scott see them anyway. 

It seems to me that you must be one of the "evil" stepmoms you are refering to. Or, at least you feel like you are being accused of it.  

I agree that the lying does happen in all these cases, I just think that the liar/liars on this show are Scott and Kimmy. 

  

Quote From: dmt779604

My husband and I have been together for 6 years and been married for 1. His ex wife has been nothing but cruel. She has stopped at nothing to let us see his 2 kids. The day we got married she only allowed the kids to be with us till 9p.m. that night. Out of 6 years we have maybe seen them 20 times. She will say cruel things about us to them and anything to stop them from coming.Now we have 2 children and he plans on adopting my son and tries to use that against us. My hope one day is that the kids will be able to see through her lies and be able to come to us. We have tried attorneys and there is nothing more for us to do. Put it this way if we ever went to Dr.Phil he would probably try to admit her into a funny farm. If anyone has any other suggestions of how we could get help please reply. 

                                                                             Thank you and remember 

                                                              FATHERS ARE LOVING AND CARING AND WANT TO SEE  

                                                                   THERE CHILDREN TOO! THEY HAVE RIGHTS 

                                                                        (EVEN IF A COURT DON'T AGREE) 

                                                                               

Quote From: angelsmuch

I guess that we just have two different views of this show. To me it seemed like the biomom was being publicly attacked. I also am pretty sure that it was stated that they had been to court recently and the mom had won. I tend to think that the biodad and stepmom are bitter about that and chose to use this as a way to get back at her. I guess I don't understand why you think it is so clear the biomom was lying. I definetly think that we needed more information than we got in this episode. To clarify, you think Tiffany was just making up the story of Kimmy slapping the children? What would she have to gain by lying about it? To me that makes NOOOO since.

Quote From: groovy

Sounds like abuse to me. 

Quote From: naturesgir

I saw a striking resemblence between the father in the second couple and Robert Blake, convicted of killing his wfe...  Coincidentally (chillingly), RB also portrayed a murderer in the film version of "In Cold Blood"...  While I do feel sorry for the guy (I don't believe he can help it), I also agree that he's probably sociopathic, and that's not curable.  He should resign himself to giving up his daughter...

Quote From: tbeeman

This lady is not a step-parent, she is a live-in girlfriend.  She has no business even being in that situation, You should not live with someone if you are not married to them especially in front of small shildren.  The Dad needs to do what is right for the children, and if he were thinking of his children, they wouldn't be in that situation at all!!! 

  

I am not a step-parent but my husband is.  He was allowed to discipline them and it was a huge mistake.  If we had it to do all over again, He would have never been the one to hand out the discipline.  We should have discussed the consequences for actions privately and I should have been the enforcer.  I wish I had never had put him nor my sons in the position they were in.  It did damage to their relationship.  I allowed him to be blamed for everything negative, and it was wrong.   The oldest is on his own and we still have one son home and twins of our own.  We now agree on what the discipline will be and I am one who is required to follow-thru.  I no longer throw him under the bus, and the realtionship between them is getting far better. 

  

In telling the step-parent to back off we are not saying that they have no input, it is saying that you discuss the rules of your home and they are the same for everyone, but the actual parent is the one who deals directly with the child.  It causes far less problems and the child doesn't feel like they are only being punished by this person because "I'm not really your kid".   

  

I've done it both ways and trust me, A step-parent being in charge of discipline will only lead to disaster.  Especially if the other parent is involved and trying to undermine the relationship to begin with. 

  

Quote From: catsagdn

Fathers are extremly important to a childs well being. Fathers according to much scientific research are far more important then mothers, contuary to popular belief, mothers are responsible for 70% of child murders and 80% of all child abuse cases, we should go back to the 1800's and demand that children belong to the father not the mother. who is with me?

Quote From: midwstgwen

Well, "angelsmuch," this show seems to have hit a nerve with you, as it has many people since custody is such a huge issue in today's day and age.  However, we were commenting on the SHOW, and the people who subjected themselves to let America hear their story.  Somewhere along the way, you obviously felt personally offended, since you have now personally attacked me calling me an "evil" stepmom.  You know nothing of me.  I am not even a stepmom, but do deal with with my kids' stepmom.  I think it is a very hard thing for everyone involved to deal with each other.  I have never argued with her, but don't agree with things my ex and she have done.  But that goes with the territory of divorce.  We couldn't get along as married parents, and divorce doesn't make it automatically easy.  I felt for everyone involved on this show, but had a harder time relating to the mom, since she did lie.  I just don't see how it was of any benefit to keep the kids from seeing their dad.  Don't you think the mom could have shown her children a lot more love by saying, "hey why don't you take the boys out for ice cream?"  The dad doesn't get to see his kids every day like the mom does.  Obviously it was the mom's first reaction to tell the dad the kids weren't there, because that's what she did.  I don't understand why that would be her first reaction, so that's another reason I had a hard time sympathizing with her.  I don't know if her "rethinking" things had as much to do with her letting him see his kids (briefly) for their sake or to save face since the cameras were rolling.  I just don't see how you can say the mom was in the right just because she changed her mind on going through with her lie.  

  

Being a custodial parent myself, I know how it feels to have your kids not with you.  But, I have to remind myself that it's all about my kids, NOT me.  I feel it makes me a better parent to have my kids come back to me being happy they had a good time with their dad and stepmom, whom they love very much.  It is a very hard thing to see your kids bond with another woman, but I would so much rather have my kids love their stepmom and enjoy their time over there, than for me to try and interfere and cause conflict with my kids and their realtionship with their dad and stepmom.  Being the parent the kids are with the most gives that parent more control and more responsibility to her kids to make sure their needs are getting met.  Even if that means giving up some of her time so her kids can spend more time with their dad.   

  

I was just stating that it is a fact that parents do lie about one another to make themselves look better.  I do have friends and family that have been through great and open relationships with their exes as well as the other end of it which made this family's problems seem extremely trivial.   

Quote From: ladyday1

Crying rape? 

Good lord in heaven, are you a woman hater, or just a "mother" hater?