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Topic : 01/17 Extreme Disorders

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Created on : Friday, January 13, 2006, 02:18:32 pm
Author : DrPhilBoard1

Does your child rage, scream and kick doors? Is his or her behavior the typical brattiness of a spoiled child, or involuntary behavior beyond the child's control? Dr. Phil sheds light on a pair of widely misunderstood extreme neurological disorders. First, he looks at Asperger's syndrome, a high-functioning form of autism which can cause a person to lack control over his or her emotions, including anger. Rich and Karen's 15-year-old son, Alex, was diagnosed with Asperger's at age 6. His sudden fits of rage and erratic behavior have put a strain on his whole family. Should his parents be afraid of Alex, or is there something they can do to bring his behavior under control? Plus, Craig, 37, can't control his physical tics, nor can he keep from constantly uttering obscenities, literally hundreds of times a day. Craig suffers from Tourette syndrome, an affliction that's gotten so bad, he won't go into grocery stores, movie theatres or any public place for fear he'll be kicked out. What will the disorder mean for his plans to start a family? Talk about the show here.

 

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January 15, 2006, 4:44 pm CST

01/17 Extreme Disorders

Quote From: karen_kiki

Thanks to Dr. Phil we see the light at the end of a very long tunnel.  It is true I have not taken care of myself or my relationship with my husband and I have felt extremely angry for some time.  Not angry at Alex but at not being the Parent who can fix it all and make the home like the perfect family from the 50's and 60's.  Ok, I know there was no perfect family however TV and Movies are deceiving.  But I want him to have the best life he can and I want to be able to relax and not worry about the not so NORMAL things.   

  

Example, last night after the Basketball Game Alex got a ride home with friends.  We left the game at 9:30 p.m. and there was 1 minute left of play (they won).  Alex didn't get home for another 90 minutes.  Under typical circumstances I would have been a worriesome mother, last night I was not just a worriesome mother but I was worrying beyond belief.  Was he calm, was he raging, had he run off due to anger, or was he being a Teenager and not thinking things through and in an environment not appropriate for him.... 

  

I had to hold back when he walked in happy, calm and unaware that it took an extra hour or so to get home.  He actually walked in, told us how the game finished, who brought him home and how they had to dropped off two other people first (the driver's girlfriend and her friend) on the opposite side of the community. 

  

Since I am always waiting for the other shoe to drop I am always ready to jump in on things..........luckily along with getting Alex some help I have found someone who I too will be working with to help me get through life (my life).  I look forward to working with viewers like yourself who can help me and I in turn will be able to help.  Reaching out getting the support we need for ourselves and our families is what will bring us all WELLNESS. 

  

Thanks for you support, Karen 

I know it is very hard to take care of yourself when it feels like all you can handle is taking care of your child.  I also have a daughter who is 5 yrs old that doesn't have any problems like my son who is 17.  Sometimes it feels like I have two 5 year old although my little girl is so much easier to handle.  I can't say I am a perfect mother because I am not.  The past couple years I have been ~trying~ to take care of myself instead of being so stressed out all the time on wondering what my son is up to.  My sons school helps him very much and understand how to handle him.  I know some schools are not that helpful but we are very lucky to have the high school in our district.  I am glad you will be on Dr. Phill to show everyone how much help we need for our children.  I am sure there are much more families that have problems like we have.  Don't forget there is always hope for everyone.  Things may not change as quick as we want them to but I am sure it will get better for you.  I feel for you and can understand some of what you are going thru. 
 
January 15, 2006, 4:48 pm CST

Thank you for doing this show

  

Hi 

Last year my 7 yr old son was diagnosed with Aspergers. I can relate to the issue of rage which in our case is often due to sensory issues.  

  

 The unknowing public can be very judgmental. I can't tell you how many times Ive been given unsolicited advice from strangers when my son has gotten mouthy in the grocery store or post office.  

  

Thank you for doing this show. I hope this show will shed light on disablities that cant be seen. 

  

Ingrid 

 
January 15, 2006, 6:13 pm CST

Thank you all for sharing your stories

I am very much looking forward to Tuesday's show.  My daughter was diagnosed with Aspergers last March along with ADHD and many sensory issues.  She just had her 6th birthday and is doing better now than a year ago.  Medication has been a blessing and I am always looking for any and all information I can on this disorder.  I have always loved my daughter but it has just been within the last 6 months that I can honestly say that I like her.  The last few years have been very tough and at times I have wondered how we have all made it through.  I know there is hope and I know how very special my little girl is.  I am finally able to parent the child that I have instead of trying to parent the child I thought or wished (and everyone else thought) I had.  Everyday I am amazed by how very smart and funny she is.  I love to watch her sleep.  It is the only time (aside from medication) that she is truly calm and still.  As hard as I find this all to deal with, I can't imagine what it must be like for her to be inside her own skin.   

  

Bless you all and a special thanks to Alex and his family for sharing their story.  It is very comforting to know that we are not alone. 

 
January 15, 2006, 6:34 pm CST

Not all is bad

Quote From: joyceymay

My son was diagnosed with Asperger's at age 5, but was getting services for developmental delays from the time he was 3.  I will watch on Tuesday, but from the preview on this web-site, I'm concerned that you're only going to talk about the worst-case scenario--all the problems that Aspies can have. 

  

My son is doing fantastic today.  He doesn't have rages and gets along well with almost everyone.  These days, he accepts change and has a great sense of humor.  He's also not as anxious as he used to be.  We're still working on building his confidence in unstructured social situations, but his behavior in the classroom is totally appropriate.  His teachers all love him and his peers respect him.  He even has a date for the senior prom!  (The only medications he takes are for asthma and allergies.) 

  

Two things really made the difference for us:  early intervention and trying to understand and address the causes of his behaviors, rather than just reacting to the symptoms.   

Although the bad sometimes seems to out weigh the good the reality of it is the Good is GREAT but when Alex goes BAD it tears everything apart. 

  

Just tonight when we came home from work we found Alex had gotten onto the internet (although it has been locked down) and he got to places he should not and used our checking account on these sites. 

  

Alex becomes obsessed with ideas and cannot let go and he will do whatever it takes to get what he wants.  This is what worries us.... 

  

We are not wealthy peope and we cannot afford not to work and be with him 24/7. 

  

When he is in control he is a typical boy but when the switch flips it worse then world war 3.  I am grateful for Dr. Phil and his staff and help we are getting. 

  

I am so glad that your early intervention helped and addressed the behaviors which resulted in your good fortune today.  We have not been so lucky. 

  

Alex has been in treatment, has been on meds, in therapy but as we are finding out it has not been right.....We are now looking a brighter future as we are being introduced to new therapies, diets and meds. 

  

Please keep in touch 

 
January 15, 2006, 6:39 pm CST

Thank you for your support

Quote From: kirasmom5

That is unfortunate about your friend not wanting your children's disabilities to link you together, I have met new and wonderful friends because my daughter has autism, people I would not have met otherwise. Best wishes to you and Alex. I will be taping the show on Tuesday... 

  

Rhonda 

mom to a 5 yr old girl with autism 

http://groups.msn.com/AutismSpectrumDisorderSupport  

  

Thank you for your kind words.  I too have met some wonderful people who don't judge and sometimes are more supportive of Alex then I am at times.  However it is sad when people don't want to be friends (or relatives) because they don't understand our situation and don't want to.  They want to live in Fantasy Land where everything is perfect.  The problem is there is no such place and even if there was I am not sure I would want to live there myself. 

  

We are anxiously awaiting to watch this on Tuesday as well............................. 

 
January 15, 2006, 7:51 pm CST

01/17 Extreme Disorders

Quote From: karen_kiki

Thanks to Dr. Phil we see the light at the end of a very long tunnel.  It is true I have not taken care of myself or my relationship with my husband and I have felt extremely angry for some time.  Not angry at Alex but at not being the Parent who can fix it all and make the home like the perfect family from the 50's and 60's.  Ok, I know there was no perfect family however TV and Movies are deceiving.  But I want him to have the best life he can and I want to be able to relax and not worry about the not so NORMAL things.   

  

Example, last night after the Basketball Game Alex got a ride home with friends.  We left the game at 9:30 p.m. and there was 1 minute left of play (they won).  Alex didn't get home for another 90 minutes.  Under typical circumstances I would have been a worriesome mother, last night I was not just a worriesome mother but I was worrying beyond belief.  Was he calm, was he raging, had he run off due to anger, or was he being a Teenager and not thinking things through and in an environment not appropriate for him.... 

  

I had to hold back when he walked in happy, calm and unaware that it took an extra hour or so to get home.  He actually walked in, told us how the game finished, who brought him home and how they had to dropped off two other people first (the driver's girlfriend and her friend) on the opposite side of the community. 

  

Since I am always waiting for the other shoe to drop I am always ready to jump in on things..........luckily along with getting Alex some help I have found someone who I too will be working with to help me get through life (my life).  I look forward to working with viewers like yourself who can help me and I in turn will be able to help.  Reaching out getting the support we need for ourselves and our families is what will bring us all WELLNESS. 

  

Thanks for you support, Karen 

I can relate to some of what you are going through.  Our 12 year old was just diagnosed with Aspergers.  He does not have the same rage as your son but can be very difficult at times.  We have a terrific doctor that is helping us to improve our lives and the life of our children in dealing with this syndrome.  I have a lot of hope and it is thanks to brave people like you that will bring it to the forefront that this type of behavior is neorological and that there is help and support out there. 

thank you for your courage 

 
January 16, 2006, 5:40 am CST

Looking Forward To This Show

I have been writing to Dr. Phil about this topic for some time.  I'm glad to see he finally is doing a show on Asperger's.  I really am anxious to see how much he touches on teens and ASD (Austism Spectrum Disorder).  I hope he doesn't focus so much on the outbursts.  Outbursts on a part of Asperger's, but I believe the social aspect is just as hard on children.  Kids can be so cruel in middle/junior high and high school. 

  

My son is 12, almost 13 and has ASD.  He is very high functioning and does well in school with just a little assistance from some awesome resource teachers.  I'm more concerned with his social abilities.  Adolescence wtih ASD have so much more to face then mainstream adolescence.  They're can be trusting soles and learn to adapt in the social world by mimicing those behaviors around them.  They are not aware of the dangers out their (ie, bullies, dating do's & don'ts, peer pressure at parties, etc.).  Kids with ASD don't recognize body language, tone in voices.  It's literally and physically painful to look a bullies  in the eye and confont them.  Sometime's they don't even recognize when they are being bullied.   

  

Yes, there are physical symptoms to ASD, but the emotional and social symptoms are most times ignored.  I'm looking forward to seeing what this show has to offer. 

  

Karen - if you are reading this, I do not wish to make light of your son and his symptoms.  I'm sure when he's good, he's good, but when he's stressed and feeling overwhelmed  he's over the top (known as Fight or Flight).  My son can get that way too ( I call them meltdowns).  Sometimes, I'm fortunate enought to catch him and bring  him back down, before he goes over the top.  From what I've read so far, it sounds like Dr. Phil has helped your family.  I wish you and your famly the best. 

 
January 16, 2006, 10:15 am CST

Glad that both AS and TS are being discussed

First I'd like to say that I am glad that Dr. Phil is focusing on a show to provide information about AS and TS.  However I'm a little worried just from the language utilized in the promos for the show as well as the video clip provided. 

  

Karen I've read your posts also and it sounds like you have tried just about every support for Alex that you could find and you have professionals that are supporting you in all of this.  Additionally it has been shown that adolescence is a time when our kids change due to chemical and neurological differences during this time as well as hormones kicking in.  Puberty is a difficult time for any child, but our kids too tend to be more effected. 

  

As the mother of two teens, one almost sixteen and our son who is 14 with ASD, it's been a blessing to have a child going through all of this before our son with ASD does for several reasons.  For one it showed us what to expect and too gave us insight to realize it was not the ASD that perhaps was causing some difficulty, but the time in our son's life. 

  

Too we've been very active parents with both our sons.  We've realized our son's uniqueness and have recognized his abilities to promote a healthier mental health existence for him.  We also found RDI (Relationship Development Intervention) at a time when the rages were just being and it helped us through that period.  Also some other things that assisted were massage therapy as well and getting him out of the house and being active.  My husband and he are now avid tandem bike riders and that too has assisted in his relationship with his dad. 

  

Overall in this I was most worried about the media portrayal of this.  Even just the title caused me to cringe.  When I read the descriptive of the show, that in itself seemed extreme and I do hope that statistic will be utilized to show the occurrence rate of rage episodes and also what can be done overall to assist individuals that go through this stage.  We too did not medicate our son for several reasons and we hope that also is addressed.  He only went through rages of this nature for about a sixth month period and we were able to work this out through other means.  We also now, with RDI and other assistance, are working with him to recognize his emotions and work through those feelings.  This has helped quite a bit and provided him avenues to have empathy for others. 

  

Best to you also Karen and please know your efforts to help others are appreciated.  You put your family before the public eye to assist others in understanding that our kids are not "behaviorally impaired" as some may think nor bad individuals, and just that will assist others in understanding the scope of AS overall hopefully.  Not many families would do what you have done and ours is very appreciative.  Send our thanks to Alex also....he was very brave to allow this. 

  

Carolyn  

  

  

 
January 16, 2006, 10:28 am CST

Asperger's Syndrome

My son was labelled with 'Asperger's' when he was 14, he is now 16.  He does not have fits of rage, on the contrary he is very docile and this sometimes posses a problem in school as he gets picked on a lot.  Although he has had a difficult time all through his school years (socially) he has always been in a regular class and this summer he will graduate from high school. 

  

He likes to think of himself as different, just like everyone else!!  It is too bad that some of the kids and teachers in school are not respectful of those differences, but that is something that my son is learning to deal with, because our society is prejudiced against differences. 

  

I will watch Dr. Phil's show, however, I disagree with the label 'extreme disorder', there are worse things that our kids can be afflicted with than Asperger's.  Let us thank god that our kids are healthy and will find their way in life, although maybe with a little quirkyness.  Albert Einstein did! 

 
January 16, 2006, 11:49 am CST

Aspergers

I am a middle aged woman with Aspergers (or AS as we call it). I have a university degree and am happily married to a wonderful 'normal' man. (Normal meaning he doesn't have AS/Aspergers).  

  

I was not out of control as a child nor am I now. I am more fiesty because I have to be to live in a world where people are not sensitive to me and those like me. I have lost jobs and friends due to thier quick judgements. So I have since throw my hands up in the air and went into something for myself.  

  

I have two kids, the eldest with AS. He is very shy and prone to panic attacks. He is not on meds at this moment but maybe by the end of the month once he sees his dr. We have started on alternative medicine for him and he is holding up. He is not angery or unkind but very senisite to the world around him. Luckily he has two very good boys who have befriended him. He is intellingent and very wise for his age. I fear for his future because of how he is treated and viewed.  

  

AS people have dealt with alot of hostilty by the world> It is not visable nor is it 'contagious'. It just is. Period. We can do amny things with our talents. Now the world should let us shine and stop treating us like we are inferior. Drugs may help us but only we can help ourselves. With the love and support of others , such as friends, and family. 

  

C. Cross 

 
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