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Topic : Borderline Personality Disorder

Number of Replies: 946
New Messages This Week: 0
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Created on : Saturday, February 04, 2006, 07:59:09 am
Author : DrPhilBoard1
If you or a loved one suffers from Borderline Personality Disorder, find encouragement and support, share advice, and connect with others dealing with this illness.

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February 9, 2006, 8:25 pm CST

howdy!

Just stumbled in here and am I glad I did!  Diagnosed w/ Borderlind PD last Nov. and know that I need the DBT, but my husband makes too much $$ for me to go to the county mental health and not enough $$ for a therapist. Insurance companies won't touch me for 12 months or more, IF AT ALL due to "pre-existing condition", and IF they will, they're wanting far more $$ than we can afford. SSDD.  I've been all over the net and am still searching.  Thanks to all who've posted, and especially to lostgirl for the links.  I'll check into them, also.  Can anyone else point me to free or low cost DBT groups on-line?  I live in a VERY SMALL community in California, and I'm looking for something close...just haven't found it, YET! 

Diagnosed many years ago with Depression, PTSD, et al, and my treatment for that has been sporatic because I was too overwhelmed raising kids on my own, going to college, getting new jobs, got laid off 3 times (company reorganizations twice and lack of business the last time) freakin' out over that and hadn't the time, $$,support, or where-with-all to take care of myself or to navigate or to make "The System" (if there is one) work FOR me instead of against me. 

Just recently got started back on SSRI so I'm getting some mental stability (?) back, and I know I have a long way to go and much to learn, and I may not get HEALED FOR GOOD this time either, but I'm gonna do all I can, when I can!  Any and all assistance is appreciated. 

SOMETIMES THE BEST THING IS TO JUST KNOW I'M NOT CRAZY OR THE ONLY ONE WHO FEELS LIKE I DO.  THANKS!!! 

They say we BPDs quit a lot... 

 
February 9, 2006, 8:34 pm CST

P.S.

Oops!  That thing about us "Quitting therapy...I don't know if that's true or not.  I know I wouldn't have if I'd had the $$ and supportive backing. 

P.S.  Just finished reading "Borderline Personality Disorder Demystified" by Robert O. Friedel, M.D. and recommend it highly.  Information is power! 

 
February 10, 2006, 4:41 am CST

Borderline Personality Disorder

Quote From: blue_white

We SHOULD all lighten up when we CAN
That sounds just fine!
Lets take this life like a RHYME
Just one-line-at-a time!

That is one of the COPING SKILLS
BPD FOLKS can learn
To be present in the moment
Each thing done in its turn

Right now --I am composing
A little rhyme for you
When Im done I will have
Something else to do

Many times I SIMPLY MUST
Live my life like that
Like right now --Im wearing
My HAT like Suess CAT!

MINDFULNESS I think its called
YOU GUESSED IT --DBT!
Im about to finish this rhyme
So today --MINDFULNESS-- worked for me!

So on to the NEXT thing to do
I guess I need to post
Greetings to all who posted here today
Now its time for me to COAST...

Blue

loved your rythem (cant spell). loved to have to post. i wish i could do as well as you in that area. (rythem) any way have an awesome day.
 
February 10, 2006, 4:45 am CST

Borderline Personality Disorder

Quote From: vickilee61

Just stumbled in here and am I glad I did!  Diagnosed w/ Borderlind PD last Nov. and know that I need the DBT, but my husband makes too much $$ for me to go to the county mental health and not enough $$ for a therapist. Insurance companies won't touch me for 12 months or more, IF AT ALL due to "pre-existing condition", and IF they will, they're wanting far more $$ than we can afford. SSDD.  I've been all over the net and am still searching.  Thanks to all who've posted, and especially to lostgirl for the links.  I'll check into them, also.  Can anyone else point me to free or low cost DBT groups on-line?  I live in a VERY SMALL community in California, and I'm looking for something close...just haven't found it, YET! 

Diagnosed many years ago with Depression, PTSD, et al, and my treatment for that has been sporatic because I was too overwhelmed raising kids on my own, going to college, getting new jobs, got laid off 3 times (company reorganizations twice and lack of business the last time) freakin' out over that and hadn't the time, $$,support, or where-with-all to take care of myself or to navigate or to make "The System" (if there is one) work FOR me instead of against me. 

Just recently got started back on SSRI so I'm getting some mental stability (?) back, and I know I have a long way to go and much to learn, and I may not get HEALED FOR GOOD this time either, but I'm gonna do all I can, when I can!  Any and all assistance is appreciated. 

SOMETIMES THE BEST THING IS TO JUST KNOW I'M NOT CRAZY OR THE ONLY ONE WHO FEELS LIKE I DO.  THANKS!!! 

They say we BPDs quit a lot... 

welcome to the board. dont know any one in calif. no way to go to mental health and ask if they if there is anyone else that can help you out? we are in the same boat. make to much $$. but i did get social security disability and they gave me medicar. couldnt believe it. since i thought we made too much. It took two years to go thru it but worth every sweat and tear. have yu thought of going in that direction? anyway glad to have you on the board. Its a tough disorder.  

  

blaze  

 
February 10, 2006, 4:48 am CST

Borderline Personality Disorder

good morning lost girl. Just thought i would say hello to you today. have a wonderful day.  

  

Blaze  

 
February 10, 2006, 5:05 am CST

Borderline Personality Disorder

Quote From: blazes06

good morning lost girl. Just thought i would say hello to you today. have a wonderful day.  

  

Blaze  

Good Morning  Blaze, have a wonderful day!
 
February 10, 2006, 10:12 am CST

Great quote

Unfortunately I am unable to remember which site I found this on, but I love it.  It seems to describe my feelings, and most other BPD-inflicted, appropriately. 

  

"Most people, when they get a flat tire on the highway call Triple A. I call the suicide hotline." 

 
February 10, 2006, 10:21 am CST

Some BPD Indicators

Quote From: looper

  

  I am involved with a woman ,  whom I have deep feelings for , has recently discovered that her daughter @ 15 yrs. has a  BPD . I am ignorant  of this illness and how best to understand it and be an effective  support person.   

  

  Unfortunately ,I have been involved in the inappropriate behavior  issues at their peak. When the daughter  was out of control to the point that violence to her mother and her self  were at hand . I interceded to prevent an unfortunate event from happening which could ruin either daughter and or mothers future . 

  

    Needless to say The daughter resents me because I have always been there when she gets out of control and puts herself and others at high risk. She gets combative ,verbally and physically,  with her mother and even with law enforcement.  

    I have stood in between the physical assaults and verbal assaults as she tries to over power her mother. In my approach to these issues I have tried to ask my self how much is normal teenage independence and how much is willful miss-behavior or where does the illness take over. 

  Still searching for the answers. 

    The daughter and mother are in intensive therapy and Mom is stressed to the max.  There are other mental health issues with an older son which she is trying to work with as well. 

     

  The daughter has spent several weeks in childrens physc. during her meltdown periods.   

    The she was tested by a physicologist within  the last two months and the final results were  

    made known this past week. 

   The mother is a professional in Speech Therapy and working on her Doctorate in Education and the inequities of education in the public sector. Mom has more than a full plate and yet her most important  oncern and responsibility is to her daughter and her wellness and safety. I have said all this  only to help understand how important her daughter is in mom's life . 

  

    I have had to be very cautious in contacting Mom as the daughter  gets belligerant to her mom. 

    

   It is my very limited understanding that persons with  BPD resent authority  of any kind and will  

  go off at any indication of authority over them. Is this correct ?      

  

       I would sincerely appreciate some enligtenment on this illness.  

  

    For those of you who suffer with BPD  my heart goes out  to you and those you hold dear.  I would be first to agrree we all need greater understanding and patience and prayers for strenght for the difficult days.  

   Thank you for any response in advance. 

  Have a brighter Day!!! 

   

Unfortunately I don't have the author's name who wrote this. I found it by researching BPD at some point within the past couple of years. Each time I found something useful, I cut and pasted it into a Word document. Most of the time I also included the source but this time I neglected to.  I apologize. Hopefully this will help you in some way. 

  

INDICATORS OF BPD: 

  

Is someone you care about causing you a great deal of pain?

Do you find yourself concealing what you think or feel because you're afraid of the other person's reaction or because it just doesn't seem worth the horrible fight or hurt feelings that will follow?

Do you feel that anything you say or do will be twisted and used against you? Are you blamed and criticized for everything wrong in the relationship-even when it makes no logical sense?

Are you the focus of intense, violent, and irrational rages, alternating with periods when the other person acts perfectly normal and loving? Does no one believe you when you explain that this is going on?

Do you feel manipulated, controlled, or even lied to sometimes? Do you feel like you're the victim of emotional blackmail?

Do you feel like the person you care about sees you as either all good or all bad, with nothing in between? Is there sometimes no rational reason for the switch?

Are you afraid to ask for things in the relationship because you will be told that you're too demanding or that there is something wrong with you? Are you told that your needs are not important?

Is the person always denigrating or denying your point of view? Do you feel that their expectations of you are constantly changing, so you can never do anything right?
Are you accused of doing things you never did and saying things you never said? Do you feel misunderstood a great deal of the time, and when you try to explain do you find that the other person doesn't believe you?

Are you constantly being put down? When you try to leave the relationship does the other person try to prevent you from leaving in a variety of ways (anything from declarations of love and promises to change to implicit or explicit threats)?

Do you have a hard time planning anything (social engagements, etc.) because of the other person's moodiness, impulsiveness, or unpredictability? Do you make excuses for their behavior or try to convince yourself that everything is okay?

Right now, are you thinking, "I had no idea that anyone else was going through this?" 

 
February 10, 2006, 12:25 pm CST

Re:Anger

Quote From: blazes06

those titles will get you every time. It too helped me to see why i react and do certain things. Feel abandoned by my biological parents. The anxiety is very high and the destructiveness of the disorder is so bad. Are you getting help with your bpd? What has helped you?
I haven't been able to get back into therapy i moved not long after getting out of that hospital and live with my sister currently. I have no transportation and she works during the hours that the clinic are open. So it has been me winging it so to speak. And doing a lot research on the net and in my groups that i belong to. I try different things out and blog alot which helps me keep track not just of my moods but my mental state as well. So that is how it is going at the moment.
 
February 11, 2006, 5:50 am CST

Borderline Personality Disorder

Quote From: celticeme

I haven't been able to get back into therapy i moved not long after getting out of that hospital and live with my sister currently. I have no transportation and she works during the hours that the clinic are open. So it has been me winging it so to speak. And doing a lot research on the net and in my groups that i belong to. I try different things out and blog alot which helps me keep track not just of my moods but my mental state as well. So that is how it is going at the moment.

Well if there is anyway you can get help try to. Call the mental health clinic in your area and see if there are any options. its not a fun disorder to live with and doing it alone. hang in there.  

  

 
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