Messages By: kphilips10

One thing many people don't realize is that it is OK to be alone.  In fact, it has its advantages.  I am happily married now (for 26 years second time around) but was single for 9 years in between my marriages.  I was never unhappy as a single person.  In fact, I found it harder to adjust to marriage than to be single.  You really get to know yourself and be independent.  I was a single parent during that entire time as well, put my self through college and got a great job - where I met my second husband.  Sometimes there are diamonds in your backyard.  You just have to be open to seeing them.  I admit, I kissed a lot of frogs before I found Prince Charming! 

I don't think I would ever go through an internet service to meet someone.  You loose all the nuances founs in face to face meetings.  You get your hopes up and then meet the person and it's all wrong.  None of the innate chemical things happen over the internet.  There is a book titled "Anatomy of Love" .  All single people should read it and then go looking.  Understanding how our bodies find mates without us even being aware of it is a good way to begin looking for someone.  But in many cases, the right one is right under our noses and we don't even realize it.  As I told my daughter, you don't need perfection, only potential.

If a person (man or woman) isn't working but just sitting around mooching off other working people, they should be kicked out!  I agree with folks who say get a job and learn a good work ethic at a young age.  I was born poor but I started working in farming jobs (tobacco, cotton, cabbage) at a very young age.  My parents always told me todo the best job I could, no matter what the work was.  We instilled that into our daughter and she is doing the same to her daughters.  No able bodied person deserves a free ride.  And the people who allow it to happen are almost as bad because they allow this to happen and continue.

I am 58 years old and when I was in school kids tried to bully me.  I was never skinny but always the smartest person in the class.  I was bullied when I was in the first grade.  I went home crying and my father and mother both told me that fighting was wrong but sometimes necessary.  When I said they were bigger than me, Daddy said to get a big stick.  However, if I started the fight, I would be in serious trouble.  Well, as advised, I tried ignoring the bullies but that didn't work.  After a few weeks, I finally took Dad's advice.  While I was on the playground, the bullies started their usual thing.  I found a big stick and beat the crap out of the leader.  The followers just stood back and watched.  I was never bullied again.  I am against fighting but sometimes you have to fight back. 

I have a friend who taught his daughter one of the martial arts.  She was being picked on in school by bigger kids.  Finally, she fought back.  The other kid's parents called the police.  My friend went to court and won his case.  His daughter has the right to defend herself - at least here in the state of Florida.