Messages By: fruittune

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October 3, 2005, 8:10 am PDT

10/03 The Family Cult

Quote From: robinz

Children are a heritage of the Lord & the fruit of the womb is His reward. This verse sums up my feelings of the upbringing I had in The Family, and reminds me of the responsible attitude and conduct which I saw continually portrayed by my parents and caregivers throughout that upbringing. I am a second generation Family member, the oldest girl in a family of nine children. Because of my parents’ deep faith & love for the Lord I was given the privilege to be raised in what I consider the absolute best environment in the world.

  

 

Throughout my 29 years I have never personally seen nor experienced anything unloving, dangerous or damaging to myself or any other children as I grew up in Family communities all throughout Australia, India, Japan, the Philippines and New Zealand. Absolutely no form of abuse is tolerated in The Family! We were raised and still live according to the loving, Godly principles laid out in the Bible and my present lifestyle clearly reflects that for any objective inquirer who should care to hear a firsthand account from one of the allegedly “abused, deprived victims.”

I live in Mexico along with my husband & our five children (ages 1-11 years old) who we feel are a reward & honor to raise. Our expanding missionary work to help the needy people of this country has many aspects ranging from giving physical aid, in the form of food, clothing, medical supplies, toys etc… to the more important spiritual aid, that of counseling, mentoring, comforting, encouraging, assisting and guiding; And this all for a very broad variety of class and culture within Mexico.

  

 

We daily interact with extremely diverse individuals from opposite walks of life i.e. orphans, delinquents, homeless families, college students, educators, lawyers, businessmen, policymakers, and officials just to name a few.

  

 

And this work is done by a team largely comprised of Family young adults ages 18 through 31, most of whom have been born & raised in The Family. The superior training that we received all of our lives has proved its value in the amazing things which we have accomplished. We were raised to be adaptable, relatable, versatile, persistent, industrious, have a strong work ethic, and we were well prepared to approach life so that we would excel in whatever capacity we chose.

  

 

Besides all the missionary work we of RESCATE are doing, there is the somewhat behind-the-scenes work of organizing, people handling, managing, accounting, organizing and fundraising. All vital to keeping our team of 28 people operational. And this took exceptional training as well! You try to run a business and then also live with your 27 other coworkers every day and notice the tact, concern, love, unselfishness, patience and countless other values needed to be productive. We were given that extra measure of morale needed by growing up in the Family.

  

 

I know that the Family in the best place for children to be raised because I lived it. –My husband lived it. –The 8 other second generation Family adults I live with lived it & we are all still living it. My eight brothers & sisters—apart from my eldest brother who moved on & has since become a very useful citizen to secular society—are all also still living it & making a difference each & every day in their respective mission fields.

  

 

April Fischer, second generation member of the Family International.

  

 

Age 30
Happily Married 11 years
Born & raised in The Family
Currently a missionary in Mexico with “Proyecto Rescate”(Project Rescue)

  

 

    

  www.myconclusion.net   

  

    Check this out! I thought this was interesting.  

   

 
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October 3, 2005, 8:22 am PDT

I know that woman

Quote From: jazzdiva2

This is an unbelievable and remarkable young woman!  That she can go through living in the cult with a myriad of negative life experiences, yet now is so articulate and able to voice her disagreement and disappointment is a testament to the resilience of the human spirit, and how her unwavering intention to get over this is leading her out.  I am so very impressed by her.  What a show of strength!  My prayers and very best are with her.

 I know that woman and I can't say my upbringing was any different than hers. I know though that she was doing alright until the death of her brother. It's tragic that he died but she cannot continue to blame the death of her brother on the Family.  

  It is always sad to lose someone who you love so dearly, but life must go on and we must find closure.  

  My life hasn't been a bed of roses but I have found that with a little bit of perseverance and hard work you can succed and really go places.  

  China, I wish you the best and pray that you will find peace! I knew your brother well and he was always was a real nice guy. RIP Abe.  

 
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October 3, 2005, 9:57 pm PDT

10/03 The Family Cult

Quote From: haunted26

Julia, I'm glad you're a happy teenager. But you see, most of the abuses that we're talking about all happened BEFORE you were born. I believe you that you have probably never seen any of the abuses we speak of, because by the time you were old enough, WE, my peers, were your 'teachers'.  

  

Abuse is very relative to those being abused. When I was in your cult, I had no idea that life as I knew it was not as life should be. I had no childhood, I had adult responsibilities at the tender age of 6. Once you become a parent, as I have done, you'll realise that children should be allowed to exoerience loss of innocence on their own, during their teenage years, and will do so without your help. Once this happens, their lives will never be the same. When we were children, we lost our innocence at the ages of 4, 5, 6, & 7.  

  

I never knew that having to go out and raise money to pay the rent at the age of 5 was wrong, or child abuse. I never realised that seeing my parents and other adults naked and in sexual situations was abuse. I never realised that when an adult man would touch me sexually and make comments to me that it was abuse. It didn't seem like abuse when I danced naked at 7 for my 'grandpa'  Berg, the ancient founding father of the group.  

  

Not even when I first left did I fully grasp enormity of what I had gone through. It was only once I had my own child that I began to re-evaluate what I knew to be the process for raising children against what I now saw in every-day life. There is nothing I would do for my child! I would never let her ask perfect strangers for money to live when I know I can go out a get a job so that she can play, go to school (a state-accredited school), ride her bike and play twister with her cousins and their puppy....now that's a childhood and I swell with pride that I was able to escape from the wreck of my childhood to provide this new life for my child.  

  I would think that if the second generation suffered abuse they would in turn become abusers themselves.you see I studied a little bit of psychology myself.  

  

  Abuse runs in Families, the parents abuse the kids then the kids in turn abuse their siblings and eventually it starts itself all over with the next generation.  

  I have no doubt that some abuse occured 15 to 20 years ago. But if the second generation members are now the "teachers" and no abuses if occuring now, what does that have to say about the group today?  

  This tells me that abuse was not as widespread as some would claim. Otherwise you'd see more abuse happening now at the hands of the abused second generation. 

  The testimonials from current young people in the Family indicate that they are for the most part happy and they believe that what they are doing is a for a good cause.  

  If you look at the evidence you would see that abuse occured over a period spanning the early to mid eighties, what the group practiced in before seems to have changed for whatever reasons and it seems like the family communities are reasonably safe places to raise children.  

   

   

 
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October 4, 2005, 4:43 am PDT

10/03 The Family Cult

Quote From: fruittune

  I would think that if the second generation suffered abuse they would in turn become abusers themselves.you see I studied a little bit of psychology myself.  

  

  Abuse runs in Families, the parents abuse the kids then the kids in turn abuse their siblings and eventually it starts itself all over with the next generation.  

  I have no doubt that some abuse occured 15 to 20 years ago. But if the second generation members are now the "teachers" and no abuses if occuring now, what does that have to say about the group today?  

  This tells me that abuse was not as widespread as some would claim. Otherwise you'd see more abuse happening now at the hands of the abused second generation. 

  The testimonials from current young people in the Family indicate that they are for the most part happy and they believe that what they are doing is a for a good cause.  

  If you look at the evidence you would see that abuse occured over a period spanning the early to mid eighties, what the group practiced in before seems to have changed for whatever reasons and it seems like the family communities are reasonably safe places to raise children.  

   

   

 http://encarta.msn.com/encnet/refpages/RefArtTextonly.aspx?refid=761562624&find=1   

IV. Causes  

Many people have difficulty understanding why any person would hurt a child. The public often assumes that people who abuse their children suffer from mental disorders, but fewer than 10 percent of abusers have mental illnesses. Most abusers love their children but tend to have less patience and less mature personalities than other parents. These traits make it difficult to cope with the demands of their children and increase the likelihood of physical or emotional abuse.  

However, there is no single explanation for child maltreatment. Child abuse results from a complex combination of personal, social, and cultural factors. These may be grouped into four primary categories: (1) intergenerational transmission of violence, (2) social stress, (3) social isolation and low community involvement, and (4) family structure.  

  

A. Intergenerational Transmission of Violence  

Many people have difficulty understanding why any person would hurt a child. The public often assumes that people who abuse their children suffer from mental disorders, but fewer than 10 percent of abusers have mental illnesses. Most abusers love their children but tend to have less patience and less mature personalities than other parents. These traits make it difficult to cope with the demands of their children and increase the likelihood of physical or emotional abuse.  

However, there is no single explanation for child maltreatment. Child abuse results from a complex combination of personal, social, and cultural factors. These may be grouped into four primary categories: (1) intergenerational transmission of violence, (2) social stress, (3) social isolation and low community involvement, and (4) family structure.  

Many children learn violent behavior from their parents and then grow up to abuse their own children. Thus, the abusive behavior is transmitted across generations. Studies show that some 30 percent of abused children become abusive parents, whereas only 2 to 3 percent of all individuals become abusive parents. Children who experience abuse and violence may adopt this behavior as a model for their own parenting.  

However, the majority of abused children do not become abusive adults. Some experts believe that an important predictor of later abuse is whether the child realizes that the behavior was wrong. Children who believe they behaved badly and deserved the abuse become abusive parents more often than children who believe their parents were wrong to abuse them 

  

 Other articles 

   www.nccafv.org/child.htm 

 

www.penpages.psu.edu/penpages_reference/28507/28507709.HTML  

 

  http://www.findarticles.com/p/articles/mi_m0AZV/is_1_40/ai_73232572 

  

http://www.gulf-news.com/Articles/print.asp?ArticleID=53303 

 

www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2005/07/050701062300.htm 

 

This study shows that the intergenerational transmission of abuse is inconclusive 

www.cyc-net.org/Newsdesk/newsdesk-000911-k.html 

 

 

 

 

 

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