Messages By: cathyjay3

I don't know what has happened to the younger parents now days. My husband and I have custody of our two granddaughters Gabby 5 Bree 3 and the father has the right to see them every Sunday but since September till the end of October he has sen then 3 times and didn't keep them the full time the courts gave him. And the last we have heard from him was in court asking if he could claim them on his taxes. The Mother got with him when she was 17 and her life has went to hell her and him started doing meth and god only knows what else. We had Gabby once before when she was 1 but then when Bree was born It was so hard for Gabby to see her mommy and daddy to leave with her sister but not her so when she was 3 we gave them custody back the stupid thing we ever did. Now since last September we have had both girls and the mother is in and out of jail the father has just dropped off the face of the earth and yet these girls Love their mommy and daddy . Even with all the abuse they went through. But I can understand that because I was abused as a child and I loved my mom and dad at time I hated them but the love was still there. And We are dealing with the girls saying they hate their mommy and daddy and what to know why they don't come see them or send them anything for their birthday or Christmas. And I have to say to them that their mom and dad love them that they are just having trouble and someday they will be back. God I hope not!! 

The girls have seen so much their parents fighting like cats and dogs and now we have to watch the 5year old because she feels like the 3 year old is moving in on her ground. She blames her for her mom and dad leaving her before and I just tell her that its not true that her sister is in the same shoe as her and that they need to be there for each other. And it seems like every time I turn around I hear of another set of grandparents raising their grandchildren. Whats going to happen to these kids when they get older and become parents all they know is Mommy's and daddy's walk out on them.And the other part that I think isn't fair is the courts gave the parents lawyers but we had to pay for ours, how is that fair? I'm 43 and I've had surgery 9 times on my back and the pain I live with 24/7 is hard to deal with when I'm trying to take care of a 3 and 5 year old. I just don't get it whats happened to the parents and why don't the courts step in and do something because we had to fight to get the girls and the only reason we did get them was because the father hadn't been in their life for almost a year other then to run back when he was hit with a child support order then he came back and married my daughter and then he was off again so that stopped the support order. And its cost to raise two kids. And my husband don't make the kind of money he was making when we got married so it's even harder now. Plus the cost of my pain pills I have had to go off of some of them because  we just couldn't afford them. How do we handle the stress and angry feeling we have the anger comes form the fact that we aren't able to be grandparents we have to play the mom and dad role we don't get to spoil them and send them home to mom and dad. Are the feeling I'm having normal are there other grandparents out there that feel this way? If so please let me know because I set up at night and cry because of the stress and anger I have. I Love the girls so much it just breaks my heart when they ask why and I don't know what to say to make them feel better and the bad dreams they have and I have to sit with them telling them its OK  nanny and pepaw is here for them and we aren't going to leave them. They don't want to leave my side so I don't get any time away form them other then when they are at school. And then I'm running around trying to get what I can done on the house but the 3 year old only goes till 11am so thats not much time. Am I wrong with the feelings I'm having? 

This mother shouldn't have this teenager. She needs to be taken from her mother A.S.A.P.

And for the mother to say her child is important to her what a joke. This poor girl has no life and I can't believe that no one has done anything to help get this child away from her mom. There is more to being a mom then just having a baby the mom is the one who should be taking care of the child. And the way she talks to her "It makes me sick when she was whistling at her like she was a dog" If the mother would get up and do some of the things herself maybe she could loss the weight. I have been over weight but I never made my child do my job as a mother. I got up off my butt and did it myself and my weight gain was due to having back surgery and being laid up but I didn't ask my child to do the thing this mother does. It was hard for me to do things and somethings I had to let somethings go but I did make sure my child had clean clothes and a hot meal it may have been a tv dinner sometimes but at least I tried. And I know its hard to loss weight I was 269 pounds and it took me over a year to lose 100 pounds but I did it and when I started it was very painful but I knew I had to take care of my child and myself and I did what I had to do. And through all 9 of my surgeries I have had to spend many of months laid up but I did a little of this and laid back down then I did a little more. I hope and pray that Dr. Phil can help this child she is in so much pain I could see it in her eyes. It broke my heart!

Try living in her shoes and their children shoes. Who knows they may feel the same way I do. But thanks for the history. And by the way my family is part Native American. And I do know where many of them had to go.Have a nice day and I hope you never have anyone to treat you the way this Lady  has been treated.