12/20 Dreading the Holidays
1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8Holiday Family Havic
Posted by: kay1313
Posted on: 2002-12-20 08:39:52
I use to always love the holidays till this year and its been a real chore for me to get in the Christmas mood. It seems that I would be really estatic about the upcoming holidays since this is the first time in 6 years I've had all my children and grandchildren local for the holidays but these people can't seem to get along. One walks in the front door and one goes to another room. Its like having everyone in time out in different rooms. I threatened( just like when they were little) to cancel Christmas but as always that didn't work. I planned a really nice Christmas eve celebration with us opening personal presents since the whole family drew names. It got so bad with my children and their spouses not talking or wanting to be in the same room I felt like we were going through the Nightmare Before Christmas. Then I got mad and told them all that I was going to have my Night Before Christmas because I never knew when we would all be together for a holiday and by god I was the adult and they were going to start acting right. I'm not saying that the night will be great but at least they know how I feel. I also told them that they were going to provide my mother with a good Christmas with the family too that we never knew how long anyone has with their family. Wish me luck.
Posted by: kay1313
Posted on: 2002-12-20 08:39:52
I use to always love the holidays till this year and its been a real chore for me to get in the Christmas mood. It seems that I would be really estatic about the upcoming holidays since this is the first time in 6 years I've had all my children and grandchildren local for the holidays but these people can't seem to get along. One walks in the front door and one goes to another room. Its like having everyone in time out in different rooms. I threatened( just like when they were little) to cancel Christmas but as always that didn't work. I planned a really nice Christmas eve celebration with us opening personal presents since the whole family drew names. It got so bad with my children and their spouses not talking or wanting to be in the same room I felt like we were going through the Nightmare Before Christmas. Then I got mad and told them all that I was going to have my Night Before Christmas because I never knew when we would all be together for a holiday and by god I was the adult and they were going to start acting right. I'm not saying that the night will be great but at least they know how I feel. I also told them that they were going to provide my mother with a good Christmas with the family too that we never knew how long anyone has with their family. Wish me luck.
Holiday Family Havic_RE: kay1313
Posted by: winigur
Posted on: 2002-12-20 15:26:18
Sounds like my house. A: younger sis has 4 children by 3 different fathers & never married. B: Brother blaims his (our) mother for my sisters stupidity. C: Mother is raising 3 out of 4 of my sister's children. D: Sister's boyfriend is always buying video games, dvds, etc and cannot pay the rent nor he and my sister's car payment. E: At thanksgiving this year I could not take anymore and told my sister's boyfriend what I thought of him after he began to tell me in the home I grew up in that we could not watch the Macy parade with the kids (tradition) because he was watching some stupid show where people fight on the show. I just let it all out how this person is a low life, he borrows from my mother, who is unemployed, receiving aid, and I give her money to help out. By he not paying his bills because he makes stupid purchases it affects me because my mother gives he and my sister money and then my mother borrows from me. ENOUGH! The only way to have some sanity and a retirement is to walk away. I have a daughter to raise and this type of environment is too sick to be a part of and this Christmas forward, I do not intend to be a part of anything involving these people I once called family. Sorry, but we kids have to be adults and sometimes that is recognizing a sickness and realizing that you cannot fix it and that you are sometimes better off not being part of your family. Friends are sometimes better than family. Not always can family be together holidays or any days.
Posted by: winigur
Posted on: 2002-12-20 15:26:18
Sounds like my house. A: younger sis has 4 children by 3 different fathers & never married. B: Brother blaims his (our) mother for my sisters stupidity. C: Mother is raising 3 out of 4 of my sister's children. D: Sister's boyfriend is always buying video games, dvds, etc and cannot pay the rent nor he and my sister's car payment. E: At thanksgiving this year I could not take anymore and told my sister's boyfriend what I thought of him after he began to tell me in the home I grew up in that we could not watch the Macy parade with the kids (tradition) because he was watching some stupid show where people fight on the show. I just let it all out how this person is a low life, he borrows from my mother, who is unemployed, receiving aid, and I give her money to help out. By he not paying his bills because he makes stupid purchases it affects me because my mother gives he and my sister money and then my mother borrows from me. ENOUGH! The only way to have some sanity and a retirement is to walk away. I have a daughter to raise and this type of environment is too sick to be a part of and this Christmas forward, I do not intend to be a part of anything involving these people I once called family. Sorry, but we kids have to be adults and sometimes that is recognizing a sickness and realizing that you cannot fix it and that you are sometimes better off not being part of your family. Friends are sometimes better than family. Not always can family be together holidays or any days.
Enough
Posted by: justice36
Posted on: 2002-12-21 23:30:00
Sounds like you'll have to make your own, new tradition. You may want to talk to your relatives away from holiday time. All I can suggest to you is to state your case briefly and calmly. This will be hard because of the strong feelings you have. (For the record, I'm with you)
Your sister's end won't change unless your mother changes what she is doing. You can try and calmly explain how this hurts your sister and her children, to continue to take on your sister's responsibilities. In the end, sadly, you will have little say over this. Happily, you can control your holidays and enjoy the season.
Don't let the guilt that will inevitably come from some family to move you to go back to this. Go see your mom around the holidays, when it can be just you and your kids, not all that drama. Constantly state your love for your mother but stand firm for your children and you on the important points. Change doesn't come easy many times.
As for the money, don't give it. All involved are adults and should be treated as such. A person who allows themselves to get into that situation needs to get themselves out. If it were only rare occasions, I'd make exceptions. Only on rare occasions. If you choose to help, pay a bill directly or buy what she needs. No cash. Be aware that regularly doing this, if the reason is your sister taking money from her, is enabling this to continue. Watch for the guilt trip on this one. 'I can't believe you're turning your back on momma'
Posted by: justice36
Posted on: 2002-12-21 23:30:00
Sounds like you'll have to make your own, new tradition. You may want to talk to your relatives away from holiday time. All I can suggest to you is to state your case briefly and calmly. This will be hard because of the strong feelings you have. (For the record, I'm with you)
Your sister's end won't change unless your mother changes what she is doing. You can try and calmly explain how this hurts your sister and her children, to continue to take on your sister's responsibilities. In the end, sadly, you will have little say over this. Happily, you can control your holidays and enjoy the season.
Don't let the guilt that will inevitably come from some family to move you to go back to this. Go see your mom around the holidays, when it can be just you and your kids, not all that drama. Constantly state your love for your mother but stand firm for your children and you on the important points. Change doesn't come easy many times.
As for the money, don't give it. All involved are adults and should be treated as such. A person who allows themselves to get into that situation needs to get themselves out. If it were only rare occasions, I'd make exceptions. Only on rare occasions. If you choose to help, pay a bill directly or buy what she needs. No cash. Be aware that regularly doing this, if the reason is your sister taking money from her, is enabling this to continue. Watch for the guilt trip on this one. 'I can't believe you're turning your back on momma'
Holidays with a an 18 year old
Posted by: loloatva
Posted on: 2003-12-19 16:09:40
I am sure that deep inside my 18 year old daughter is experiencing the pain of making her first big adult decision not to be with me(her mom) this holiday season. She has just turned 18 and moved out to her new apartment - with her 3 week known boyfriend and is heading off to another state to spend the holidays. I have another daughter bound by an agreement to spend the holiday with her father in another state and my husband is currently in Europe with an ill family member. All of my family lives across the country and we are extremely close... I have tried for tickets and pet care here without success--- I will be alone and my 18 year old does not feel the pain for me missing my immediate family and close extended family. I hope the aliens return her to the compassionate daughter I know and love very much real soon... I sure miss her! Happy holidays and remember --- warm memories of holidays past really do live in our hearts forever! God Bless!!
Posted by: loloatva
Posted on: 2003-12-19 16:09:40
I am sure that deep inside my 18 year old daughter is experiencing the pain of making her first big adult decision not to be with me(her mom) this holiday season. She has just turned 18 and moved out to her new apartment - with her 3 week known boyfriend and is heading off to another state to spend the holidays. I have another daughter bound by an agreement to spend the holiday with her father in another state and my husband is currently in Europe with an ill family member. All of my family lives across the country and we are extremely close... I have tried for tickets and pet care here without success--- I will be alone and my 18 year old does not feel the pain for me missing my immediate family and close extended family. I hope the aliens return her to the compassionate daughter I know and love very much real soon... I sure miss her! Happy holidays and remember --- warm memories of holidays past really do live in our hearts forever! God Bless!!
kay1313..christmas
Posted by: koozycat
Posted on: 2002-12-20 17:08:28
GOOD FOR YOU!! I WISH EVERYONE OF MY FAMILY MEMBERS WOULD READ YOUR COMMENT. OUR FAMILY HATES ONE ANOTHER SO MUCH THAT MY MOTHER HAS 2-3 DIFFERENT CHRISTMAS OPEN HOUSES SO THAT SHE WILL GET TO SEE ALL HER CHILDREN AND GRANDCHILDREN. I WISH SHE WOULD WRITE EVERYONE OF HER CHILDREN AND SAY PRETTY MUCH WHAT YOU SAID. YOU ARE 100 PERCENT RIGHT ON THE MONEY! DON'T BACK DOWN EVEN ONE LITTLE BIT! I HOPE YOU HAVE A VERY MERRY CHRISTMAS AND THAT YOUR FAMILY WON'T LET YOU DOWN. .......SANDY
Posted by: koozycat
Posted on: 2002-12-20 17:08:28
GOOD FOR YOU!! I WISH EVERYONE OF MY FAMILY MEMBERS WOULD READ YOUR COMMENT. OUR FAMILY HATES ONE ANOTHER SO MUCH THAT MY MOTHER HAS 2-3 DIFFERENT CHRISTMAS OPEN HOUSES SO THAT SHE WILL GET TO SEE ALL HER CHILDREN AND GRANDCHILDREN. I WISH SHE WOULD WRITE EVERYONE OF HER CHILDREN AND SAY PRETTY MUCH WHAT YOU SAID. YOU ARE 100 PERCENT RIGHT ON THE MONEY! DON'T BACK DOWN EVEN ONE LITTLE BIT! I HOPE YOU HAVE A VERY MERRY CHRISTMAS AND THAT YOUR FAMILY WON'T LET YOU DOWN. .......SANDY
Missing Family
Posted by: vateacher
Posted on: 2002-12-22 00:27:41
I can understand how the holidays must be stressful for you. I dread Christmas with my grandmother for a different reason. My cousin was killed in an automobile accident this year, and Christmas without him will be hard on all of us. It will be especially hard on my grandmother. No grandparent wants to outlive their grandchild. I know family members can really get on our nerves at times, but be thankful that you have them with you. It beats the alternative. Good luck to you. I hope that you have the Merry Christmas that you want and deserve.
Posted by: vateacher
Posted on: 2002-12-22 00:27:41
I can understand how the holidays must be stressful for you. I dread Christmas with my grandmother for a different reason. My cousin was killed in an automobile accident this year, and Christmas without him will be hard on all of us. It will be especially hard on my grandmother. No grandparent wants to outlive their grandchild. I know family members can really get on our nerves at times, but be thankful that you have them with you. It beats the alternative. Good luck to you. I hope that you have the Merry Christmas that you want and deserve.
Missing Family also
Posted by: shilo935
Posted on: 2004-12-16 16:20:06
I lost my daughter 10 years ago today. she left behind a 1yr.old daughter,& 2year old son. she had just turned 21. I have a hard time all year- but more so at this time of the year. Christmas was always magical with us. It will always be hard- but as each year goes by, I try to remember that Hope would not want sadness but joy to be spread around. I spend Christmas week with my son and family,and we share the memories of the past, but also make new memories with his daughter, and my new husband. After all- Christmas is a time for joy, and those that we have lost would want it that way. And I also tell everyone- "Be thank-ful you have your family". God Bless you and your family, and remember the memories over the pain. The living need us too.- that was what I had to remember. Happy Holidays to your family.!
Posted by: shilo935
Posted on: 2004-12-16 16:20:06
I lost my daughter 10 years ago today. she left behind a 1yr.old daughter,& 2year old son. she had just turned 21. I have a hard time all year- but more so at this time of the year. Christmas was always magical with us. It will always be hard- but as each year goes by, I try to remember that Hope would not want sadness but joy to be spread around. I spend Christmas week with my son and family,and we share the memories of the past, but also make new memories with his daughter, and my new husband. After all- Christmas is a time for joy, and those that we have lost would want it that way. And I also tell everyone- "Be thank-ful you have your family". God Bless you and your family, and remember the memories over the pain. The living need us too.- that was what I had to remember. Happy Holidays to your family.!
divorce xmas
Posted by: repoocv
Posted on: 2002-12-20 10:16:43
My parents divorced once I was an adult. This caused great stress over the hoidays getting to see everyone. I decided I would have the holidays at my home and both parents would be invited. They have behaved well and has not been a problem. A couple years my father and his wife have chose not to come, but that was there lose. I then divorced and this really made it easier to balance visit days and the holidays. I have a simple group Christmas eve and a big dinner Christmas day. Whatever time the kids are here, we celebrate. The last year has put stress on my children because their paternal grandmother has cancer, but I have assured them that they really need to spend this time with her. (I only divorced their father, not the family, they are wonderful people). I hope this might help the guest that hated the running every where for Christmas. I provice the main meal and family and friends bring a dish to pass. I also have a weak point that any one I know that is not going to be with family is invited. So, you never know who and how many people will be here, but is great. My home is my castle and I love the company. There is no hauling children away from their new toys this way either.
Merry Christmas to all. Remember a family is a lot like fruitcake, sweet, but is does have some nuts.
Posted by: repoocv
Posted on: 2002-12-20 10:16:43
My parents divorced once I was an adult. This caused great stress over the hoidays getting to see everyone. I decided I would have the holidays at my home and both parents would be invited. They have behaved well and has not been a problem. A couple years my father and his wife have chose not to come, but that was there lose. I then divorced and this really made it easier to balance visit days and the holidays. I have a simple group Christmas eve and a big dinner Christmas day. Whatever time the kids are here, we celebrate. The last year has put stress on my children because their paternal grandmother has cancer, but I have assured them that they really need to spend this time with her. (I only divorced their father, not the family, they are wonderful people). I hope this might help the guest that hated the running every where for Christmas. I provice the main meal and family and friends bring a dish to pass. I also have a weak point that any one I know that is not going to be with family is invited. So, you never know who and how many people will be here, but is great. My home is my castle and I love the company. There is no hauling children away from their new toys this way either.
Merry Christmas to all. Remember a family is a lot like fruitcake, sweet, but is does have some nuts.
Christmas Day with Abuser
Posted by: samblueyes
Posted on: 2002-12-20 11:06:09
I have recently recalled childhood memories of my father sexually abusing me. My family does not know about this, and so I am really finding it difficult to face going to my parents' place on Christmas Day. I am not ready to talk to my Mum and siblings about it, and feel that they would hate me and not believe me anyway. Every moment I spend near my family and resent it, particularly my father, makes me feel invisible, ungrateful and traumatised. I hate Christmas!!!
Posted by: samblueyes
Posted on: 2002-12-20 11:06:09
I have recently recalled childhood memories of my father sexually abusing me. My family does not know about this, and so I am really finding it difficult to face going to my parents' place on Christmas Day. I am not ready to talk to my Mum and siblings about it, and feel that they would hate me and not believe me anyway. Every moment I spend near my family and resent it, particularly my father, makes me feel invisible, ungrateful and traumatised. I hate Christmas!!!
Posted by: amanda6772
Posted on: 2002-12-20 14:50:46
If this is so you owe it to your family and yourself to let everyone know it. He needs professional help.
I HATE YOUR FATHER TOO
Posted by: koozycat
Posted on: 2002-12-20 17:18:06
samblueyes ; I am sorry that you were hurt as a child and I truly understand the part about confronting the family, you are probably right that they would not believe you as I believe most abusers deny ever doing anything to their victims. I cannot help you, but maybe just knowing I will be thinking about you on Christmas and believing in you, will make your Christmas
a little better. Abuse just is'nt right! I hope someday he will pay for what he did to you. You did not deserve it. MerryChristmas - koozycat
Posted by: koozycat
Posted on: 2002-12-20 17:18:06
samblueyes ; I am sorry that you were hurt as a child and I truly understand the part about confronting the family, you are probably right that they would not believe you as I believe most abusers deny ever doing anything to their victims. I cannot help you, but maybe just knowing I will be thinking about you on Christmas and believing in you, will make your Christmas
a little better. Abuse just is'nt right! I hope someday he will pay for what he did to you. You did not deserve it. MerryChristmas - koozycat
Thank You
Posted by: samblueyes
Posted on: 2003-01-29 18:04:26
Dear koozycat,
Thank you for your warm and thoughtful wishes. I survived Christmas, and haven't seen my parents since 1st of January, and today is the 30th... I feel better not to have their toxicity in my life. Again, thanks for your words of care.
samblueyes
Posted by: samblueyes
Posted on: 2003-01-29 18:04:26
Dear koozycat,
Thank you for your warm and thoughtful wishes. I survived Christmas, and haven't seen my parents since 1st of January, and today is the 30th... I feel better not to have their toxicity in my life. Again, thanks for your words of care.
samblueyes
only tell when YOU are ready to
Posted by: nlsgal
Posted on: 2002-12-20 20:05:44
Have you sought any counselling or help? that would be a good start, then you will have some support and hopefully some helpful advice.. there are helplines you can ring too.. don't be pushed into anything more than you want now... Best Wishes.
Posted by: nlsgal
Posted on: 2002-12-20 20:05:44
Have you sought any counselling or help? that would be a good start, then you will have some support and hopefully some helpful advice.. there are helplines you can ring too.. don't be pushed into anything more than you want now... Best Wishes.
re: tell when you're ready
Posted by: samblueyes
Posted on: 2003-01-29 18:07:54
Thanks for your advice. I am currently seeing a great psychologist, and this has been very helpful and grounding. I have found working through "Self Matters" great too... 2 of my ten defining moments are abuse by my father... it certainly helps journalling about it. Thanks again.
Posted by: samblueyes
Posted on: 2003-01-29 18:07:54
Thanks for your advice. I am currently seeing a great psychologist, and this has been very helpful and grounding. I have found working through "Self Matters" great too... 2 of my ten defining moments are abuse by my father... it certainly helps journalling about it. Thanks again.
christmas w/abuser
Posted by: rmknlp
Posted on: 2002-12-23 02:41:01
A suggestion, would be talk to a counsellor right away, perhaps some one involved with Neuro Lingistic Programming or "NLP". A very healthy and quick way of eliminating unwanted emotions, leading to feeling resolved with the issue.
Another suggestion, is when around him, think of a large, thick piece of plexi-glass between the two of you. everything "ucky" will stick to his side of the plexi-glass. If you like the idea take it or not.
rmknlp@yahoo.com
Posted by: rmknlp
Posted on: 2002-12-23 02:41:01
A suggestion, would be talk to a counsellor right away, perhaps some one involved with Neuro Lingistic Programming or "NLP". A very healthy and quick way of eliminating unwanted emotions, leading to feeling resolved with the issue.
Another suggestion, is when around him, think of a large, thick piece of plexi-glass between the two of you. everything "ucky" will stick to his side of the plexi-glass. If you like the idea take it or not.
rmknlp@yahoo.com
You are not alone
Posted by: girlspirit
Posted on: 2002-12-25 18:35:13
No doubt there are many others out there who can share in your very sad situation. My own abuser was my cousin, whom I choose not to ever see or speak to again. Even seeing his mother (my aunt) brings back memories, and I dreaded seeing her this Christmas but fortunately lucked out when she didn't show. Unfortunately, we have a long, hard road to travel after being victims of such an act. It's nearly impossible to trust again. I must admit, I am one to believe that you need not tell if you don't want to. That is something you must feel ready for and until then, don't push yourself or be too hard on yourself. You may never want to tell. Therapists say it's healthy, but if no one will believe you, only to treat YOU as the family outcast, I can't imagine that it can be that healthy. I would rather try to move on with my life and not be subjected to the pain of the past, with the constant label of victim across my forehead. In your case, it seems you are have every reason to dread Christmas since your family will be expecting you and they are unaware of your situation. (Although, who knows what your siblings are keeping to themselves as well?) I wonder if the best thing for you would be to take a holiday and surround yourself with friends you trust and who will make you feel comfortable and loved. I find that distancing myself helps me feel healthier. Surround yourself with positive, loving friends who accept you for who you are. That is the best gift. Good luck, Sam.
Posted by: girlspirit
Posted on: 2002-12-25 18:35:13
No doubt there are many others out there who can share in your very sad situation. My own abuser was my cousin, whom I choose not to ever see or speak to again. Even seeing his mother (my aunt) brings back memories, and I dreaded seeing her this Christmas but fortunately lucked out when she didn't show. Unfortunately, we have a long, hard road to travel after being victims of such an act. It's nearly impossible to trust again. I must admit, I am one to believe that you need not tell if you don't want to. That is something you must feel ready for and until then, don't push yourself or be too hard on yourself. You may never want to tell. Therapists say it's healthy, but if no one will believe you, only to treat YOU as the family outcast, I can't imagine that it can be that healthy. I would rather try to move on with my life and not be subjected to the pain of the past, with the constant label of victim across my forehead. In your case, it seems you are have every reason to dread Christmas since your family will be expecting you and they are unaware of your situation. (Although, who knows what your siblings are keeping to themselves as well?) I wonder if the best thing for you would be to take a holiday and surround yourself with friends you trust and who will make you feel comfortable and loved. I find that distancing myself helps me feel healthier. Surround yourself with positive, loving friends who accept you for who you are. That is the best gift. Good luck, Sam.
re: you are not alone
Posted by: samblueyes
Posted on: 2003-01-29 18:15:49
Thank you for your empathetic and caring words of wisdom and understanding. I wish you the best for your journey too.
I survived Christmas Day by spending the evening with friends after doing the obligitory family lunch. This will be my choice for future Christmases.
Again thanks.
Posted by: samblueyes
Posted on: 2003-01-29 18:15:49
Thank you for your empathetic and caring words of wisdom and understanding. I wish you the best for your journey too.
I survived Christmas Day by spending the evening with friends after doing the obligitory family lunch. This will be my choice for future Christmases.
Again thanks.
RE: You are not alone
Posted by: girlspirit
Posted on: 2003-02-21 14:34:48
Samblueyes:
I wondered how things went for you. Thanks for letting us know. There's no shame in spending holidays with friends instead of family. Friends are such a gift. They love you and support you because they WANT to, not because they have to. Do whatever you need to in order to take care of yourself and stay healthy. Most of all, try and put the past behind you and live your life... GUILT FREE! :o)
Posted by: girlspirit
Posted on: 2003-02-21 14:34:48
Samblueyes:
I wondered how things went for you. Thanks for letting us know. There's no shame in spending holidays with friends instead of family. Friends are such a gift. They love you and support you because they WANT to, not because they have to. Do whatever you need to in order to take care of yourself and stay healthy. Most of all, try and put the past behind you and live your life... GUILT FREE! :o)
Abusive Relationships
Posted by: arrayah
Posted on: 2004-12-15 23:15:11
Samblueyes, I am so sorry that this is happening to you. Please tell someone, anyone, what is going on. This is an unhealthy environment. I lived in an abusive home as well. I used to just dissociate myself from it, but I developed an eating disorder at the age of 10 and I am now 24 and still struggling with it. You don't need to be going through this stuff alone. I never told anyone until I was 17 and 3 months before my 18th birthday what was going on. My brother was my abuser. I can't stand him now either; even worse, my mother new! She watched and laughed as it was happening and she just let it happen. I'm supposed to go home for Xmas break from college and that means I'll have to put up with her. I'm dreading it big time.
Posted by: arrayah
Posted on: 2004-12-15 23:15:11
Samblueyes, I am so sorry that this is happening to you. Please tell someone, anyone, what is going on. This is an unhealthy environment. I lived in an abusive home as well. I used to just dissociate myself from it, but I developed an eating disorder at the age of 10 and I am now 24 and still struggling with it. You don't need to be going through this stuff alone. I never told anyone until I was 17 and 3 months before my 18th birthday what was going on. My brother was my abuser. I can't stand him now either; even worse, my mother new! She watched and laughed as it was happening and she just let it happen. I'm supposed to go home for Xmas break from college and that means I'll have to put up with her. I'm dreading it big time.
Lonely Holidays
Posted by: gitano87
Posted on: 2002-12-20 11:17:58
I am 73 and totally alone. I don't say this in a complaining way, for I have chosen this. I have been married three times and have seven children. All of my children have alienated themselves from me and I do not hear from them. My wives are still my firends. I now am retired and live in Mexico.
Holidays are a dread to me because it emphasises my aloneness. I must wait out the holidays being alone until life, in general, with the rest of the pouplation, resumes.
When you are alone, everyone forgets there are those of us, due to no fault of our own, are alone and long for an inclusion of some type during the holidays. All the things that you occupy yourself with normally are closed, the gym, your favorite places to spend time, your different forms of entertiment, etc. Cosequently, your aloness is accenuated.
Posted by: gitano87
Posted on: 2002-12-20 11:17:58
I am 73 and totally alone. I don't say this in a complaining way, for I have chosen this. I have been married three times and have seven children. All of my children have alienated themselves from me and I do not hear from them. My wives are still my firends. I now am retired and live in Mexico.
Holidays are a dread to me because it emphasises my aloneness. I must wait out the holidays being alone until life, in general, with the rest of the pouplation, resumes.
When you are alone, everyone forgets there are those of us, due to no fault of our own, are alone and long for an inclusion of some type during the holidays. All the things that you occupy yourself with normally are closed, the gym, your favorite places to spend time, your different forms of entertiment, etc. Cosequently, your aloness is accenuated.
