11/12 Living Beyond Your Means

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    Get rid of the pets
    Posted by: angelmutt
    Posted on: 2002-11-12 15:35:45


    Oh, Dr. Phil...I'm so disappointed in you. Your advice is usually so solid...but would you advise someone with "too many" kids to get rid of one or two? I don't think so. But you had no problem recommending getting rid of a pet or two.

    These people have definitely overextended, but "getting rid of" a pet only gives their kids the message that pets are throw-away.

    I have spent most of my life in sheltering and rescue -- and know the inevitablity of euthanasia of unwanted pets. No, let's get "real" and call it what it is: killing perfectly healthy animals because someone "got rid of them" to simplify their lives.

    Please Doc...no matter how chaotic someone's life is, please don't suggest that "disposing" of a living being is a reasonable solution. Don't send that message to kids...or adults. Make sure that your advice includes kindness and responsibility.

    Best regards,
    PK Placko
    Montrose, PA

    Dessin Animal Shelter
    Missing Pet Network: NJ, NY, PA

    "Saving one dog won't change the world,
    But it will change the world for that one dog."
      give me a break
      Posted by: neesie818
      Posted on: 2002-11-12 15:45:33


      It was probably a stupid choice to take on that pet. Is it okay if they acknowledge that and then find the pet a home and NOT replace it with another? Please, please, please???????
        Re:give me a break
        Posted by: poopoohead
        Posted on: 2002-11-14 18:10:14


        why was it a stupid choice??????bearded dragons are one of the nicest reptiles around they are almost like dogs they are very good pets.that is like saying "its astupid idea to adopt a child"The people could instead of buying crickets from the store they could buy them off of a website such as www.reptilefood.com where the total amount for 1000 crickets is about 18 dollars(including overnight shipping)where as at the store the price is double maby triple that.if he loves his bearded dragon and all his other "critters" he should be able to keep them.i have 3 leopard geckos im getting a bearded dragon and a turtle plus i have 3 dogs.i love all my animals and they are there for me and never get mad at me.So he shouldnt get rid of his animals they love him and he loves them.Im dissapointed in you dr phil!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
          this one's for you...Poopoohead
          Posted by: neesie818
          Posted on: 2002-11-20 15:09:55


          If you think bearded dragons are worth the time and money then you should ASK this family for the one they don't have the time for anymore. Go ahead and LOVE all your animals, that's real nice. But if they're not a families highest priority for heaven's sakes just LET THEM GO. The point of the show was a family with too many time & money obligations. Even if they kept the pets they weren't HOME enough to CARE for them.
        give me a break
        Posted by: goldieloxm
        Posted on: 2002-11-23 21:59:43


        My heart breaks that you actually think a "good home" is just around the corner. I hope you will read the comments in here and try and open your heart and mind a little more to the realities of that "good home" that 486,000 dogs and cats don't find every day in this country alone. Then you can take a break and think over at length what you read about the future of so many thousands of orphaned anmimals.

        How important spaying and neutering is. This is so sad to read these comments of encouraging and promoting the disposing of life. God Bless America
      New message for kids - Fiscal responsiblity
      Posted by: jms916
      Posted on: 2002-11-12 15:49:00


      I would think that setting a solid example of fiscal responsibility would be more useful for the kids. I love animals, but am not about to let them be part of the reason my family was in dire straights. They should have figured in the cost of having so many pets before getting them.

      The multiple entertainment medias in the house are ridiculous. Who need that much entertainment and when do these people have time to utilize them???

      Parents today are scared to death of the word "NO", and worried about not fitting in with the rest of the strung out people in this world. Time to rearrange priorities, forget what Joe Schmoo and family is doing and get on the road to a more peaceful and enjoyable family life.
        New message for kids response to fiscal responsibi
        Posted by: patamar
        Posted on: 2002-11-12 19:13:45


        Getting rid of the expensive cars and trucks and extra televisions and vcrs and computers and down sizing their spending is a good thing. Throwing away pets they have had for years is cruel to the pets and to the children and teaches the children that if it gets in the way, get rid of it, even if it is alive and breathing. Also, critters are emotional beings not to be treated like the televisions and computers.

        Patamar
          I'm disappointed in you Phil..
          Posted by: kyliea02
          Posted on: 2002-11-13 10:50:08


          I agree that these people were way above their means.

          But encouraging them to get rid of their pets?

          Ok so what you are telling people is when things get tough financially get rid of your pets. Then when things are better, get more? Then get rid of them again when things get tough? Or are you telling people having money problems to get rid of their pets and NEVER get any more? I don't understand that reasoning.

          Pets are a responsibility and a committment. Isn't that what you are always complaining about? How nobody wants to live up to their responsibilities and committments?

          If these parents get rid of their pets, they will be teaching their kids how to SHIFT responsibility, not how to be responsible.

          And let the son use his allowance for crickets. That would teach him a bit about spending money. Is that so hard?

          Bad advice on the pet thing Phil. Look at how many throwaway pets are euthanized each year.

          Also, what is too many for one person to handle is not too many for another. Cat food is not these people's biggest problem!
            You said it!
            Posted by: ktmac6
            Posted on: 2002-11-13 17:04:07


            You took the words right out of my mouth!

            The pets are there now and should remain. Good advice would have been not to acquire any MORE pets (or children for that mattter)! Besides, having pets is cheaper than therapy and often more effective!!

            I'll wait patiently (and fruitlessly) for a retraction!!
        re:fiscal responsiblility
        Posted by: 1through5
        Posted on: 2003-03-19 18:23:04


        I totally agree w/you. You sound like you have so much on the ball. I, too, am a 'strung out' parent, and only recently have realized the toll it is taking on me, spiritually and physically. Through my mothers help, I am trying, also, to simplify our lives (we have 5 very busy active children-ages 4 through 17)...and have always been strong about saying no to them...but, realize the past year, and forgotten how to stand strong against ALL their wants, desires, and temper tantrums. Your message, truly is exciting to me, as it shored up what my mother has been saying to be solidly the past couple of months. Thanks for the boost...and shooting it straight.
        I agree people are afraid to say
        Posted by: cougle
        Posted on: 2004-03-19 23:09:55


        yep people are afraid to say no to their children
      Still good advice
      Posted by: walkies
      Posted on: 2002-11-12 15:49:57


      I too was concerned when Dr. Phil mentioned getting rid of the pets. However, maybe his comments will spur people to consider the realities of pet ownership and the long term commitment involved before bringing one home. Sometimes giving an animal up for adoption is the right thing to do when someone cannot look after it adequately or provide a good home. I would far rather see that than neglect or abuse.
        Let's get real!!!
        Posted by: earthdog
        Posted on: 2002-11-12 18:46:44


        When you consider the $1200/mo for cars (not counting upkeep on those vehicles) and the hundreds spent on entertainment and designer clothes the dogs and cats are a drop in the bucket and should teach their children life lessons (compassion, caring, responsibility etc) so i think they are "paying their way".....in my mind the lizard is excluded from these comments and i veiw it like a designer pet and sends the wrong message to the children and agree that a new home needs to be found....i think if these people get real about what they can really afford and get rid of all that excess $2500 a year can be afforded easily.....i am giving dr phil the benefit of the doubt that he was trying to make a point and not create 5 homeless animals (not counting the lizard)...
          About the Lizard
          Posted by: aminalz
          Posted on: 2002-11-13 01:48:00


          Why do you consider the lizard a 'designer pet'? I agree with everything else that you said, but I strongly feel the bearded dragon should be included when you say that the pets should be kept and not gotten rid of.

          Lizards are animals, too. With needs and thoughts and feelings. And though they may not bond with their owners as the dogs & cats do, they should not be rehomed at any change in life. What does that teach the kids? That 'untraditional pets' are disposable?
            you are missing the point..
            Posted by: nathaliend
            Posted on: 2002-11-14 14:45:56


            I think you are missing the point here. In order to have a less chaotic life, Dr Phil mentionned the lizard not only because of the exotic pet perception but the mom said that it was a lot of trouble feeding it and also expensive. The kids can of course have animals but not to the expense of the other member of the family. and ALSO, she admited that she was not able to say no when the kids wanted another pet. That have nothing to do with having a pet but not being able to say no therefore they should have a family meeting about which one to keep and find a better home for the other one. A child doesn't need 4 or 5 pet in his life come on. One or two will give the children all the love and affection a pet can give... and it will teach them that sometimes we can make decisions too fast and there are solutions to set it back to normal. And please when Dr Phil say something, he never said, get rid of them and trhow them out of the street, don't make him say things he did not say...
              you are missing the point
              Posted by: goldieloxm
              Posted on: 2002-11-23 21:05:01


              Yes, you are, you realize that if any or all of these family members are placed in a "good home" will bump other orphaned dogs and cats out of those "good homes". 486,000 dogs & cats put down every day in this country alone. You miss the point my friend! Yes Dr. Phil, I too am very dissappointed as well. You should apologize on air and on the message board, you are a very influential person, you really need to fix this situation. Even you can end up not being fun to live with everyday at 3.

              If people would spay and neuter their pets, there wouldn't be as many multiple pet homes. I have 5, how many do you have? A visit to the local animal shelter might enlighten some of you out there that think these "good homes" are so easy to find. Dr Phil didn't say throw them in the street, he didn't have to,the insensitivity as to what their future may hold was pretty plain. Sometimes it what's not said that throws away life.
        responsibility
        Posted by: oprakitas
        Posted on: 2002-11-13 11:16:22


        How many animals given up for adoption do you and others think are ever adopted. Read the statistics on how many pets are destroyed a year (or even a day) because families gave them up for adoption.
          responsiblility
          Posted by: goldieloxm
          Posted on: 2002-11-23 21:07:33


          Right on
        Cruel Advice
        Posted by: mrbobgomez
        Posted on: 2002-11-13 14:46:20


        "Giving an animal up for adoption" is a nice-sounding euphemism for tossing a family pet into a frightening concrete and cinderblock building where they don't know anyone and get to sit scared and alone for a week or so until they are killed. If they're lucky they get death by lethal injection, but in many states it's considered "humane" to cram as many dogs and cats as possible into a little box that is then filled with poison gas.

        No one said these people are neglecting or abusing their animals. Yes it's better for people to consider the realities of pet ownership before getting a pet, but I think it's just as important for people to consider the realities of "giving an animal up for adoption" before they advocate it.
          mrbobgomez
          Posted by: nomosno
          Posted on: 2002-11-13 15:39:51


          You are so right. We live in a throw away society. People always want to take the easy way out. Just give away the pets. Don't even think about the love and loyalty this animal has given to the whole family. Unconditional none the less. Cruelty by mankind is a huge make up of life on this planet. I find it very difficult to have compassion for people who abuse animals and little children. It disgusts me to the very fiber of my being.
          Debbie