08/14 Sex Wars

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    Am I that different???
    Posted by: gingerw126
    Posted on: 2003-04-24 09:02:16


    I did not like oral sex in my first marriage. In my second it is one of my favorite things to give my husband. It is almost foreplay for me. It turns me on to please him that way.
      gingerw126~Your NOT different
      Posted by: goldiefawn
      Posted on: 2003-04-24 09:07:23


      My opinion (because I feel the same way) is that you must feel "more" excepted and more intimate with your 2nd husband than you did your first husband. For me, I found out that "I" had to feel excepted as a person by my spouse in order to perform or except even the thought of oral sex. I have to feel the intimacy and exceptance. It has to do with trust I believe also. I trust my 2nd husband more than I have anyone. ~Goldie
        oh and...
        Posted by: goldiefawn
        Posted on: 2003-04-24 09:15:43


        just because I am having problems recently with my sex life with my husband doesnt mean that I dont know anything about it. LOL! I know alot, both the physical and psychological aspects is why I am so frustrated...sighs. ~Goldie
        Lack of love and acceptance; intimacy?
        Posted by: berliz
        Posted on: 2003-08-15 14:01:34


        It doesn't excite me to perform oral sex. Is it an obligation? My husband had me believing that when he had a hard-on he was in pain, couldn't do anything about it and it was my obligation to do so. (It happened in his parents camper; they were sleeping in the upper bed and could view us. I felt like I was being raped.) He finally said he was tired of begging for sex, I had to make the first move. (Is this tipical?) Well, I was raised in Texas (used to southern gentlemen not Jackmornons.) I have gain weight after a tubalygation that he threw a fit that I have done, we have four children. It threw me into a continual baby blues state and I took "Haldol" for 14 years.) He once said we were too fat to make love. That his ashma medication took away his desire. He since then had a four year affair with his 20 year younger,shapely business partner. After I found out about the affair, I was dianosed with inflammitory breast cancer, had both breast removed and am recovering, (I am, as of now, cancer free!.) He stood by me through my illness, he was in tears when he found out. He still carries his partner's picture in his wallet and I'm not recovering well with the aftermath of infidelity. I can't give him my heart again. We haven't had sex in 10 years.
        Lack of love and acceptance; intimacy?
        Posted by: berliz
        Posted on: 2003-08-15 14:52:37


        It doesn't excite me to perform oral sex. Is it an obligation? My husband had me believing that when he had a hard-on he was in pain, couldn't do anything about it and it was my obligation to do so. (It happened in his parents camper; they were sleeping in the upper bed and could view us. I felt like I was being raped.) He finally said he was tired of begging for sex, I had to make the first move. (Is this tipical?) Well, I was raised in Texas (used to southern gentlemen not Jackmornons.) I have gain weight after a tubalygation that he threw a fit that I have done, we have four children. It threw me into a continual baby blues state and I took "Haldol" for 14 years.) He once said we were to fat to make love. That his ashma medication took away his desire. He since then had a four year affair with his 20 year younger,shapely business partner. After I found out about the affair, I was dianosed with inflammitory breast cancer, had both breast removed and am recovering, (I am,as of now, cancer free!.) He stood by me through my illness, he was in tears when he found out. He still carries his partner's picture in his wallet and I'm not recovering well with the aftermath of infidelity. I can't give him my heart again. We haven't had sex in over 10 years.
      In a loving way
      Posted by: privetteme
      Posted on: 2003-04-24 09:41:39


      I can't see oral sex as being distasteful if it works for you and your husband. Believe me, it works for lots of couples. A way of showing how much a person cares about how to please their mate. And I feel it is part of being very sexual. I also enjoy making my man feel loved in a very private way.
        what about the other way around?
        Posted by: nancy861
        Posted on: 2003-04-24 16:23:19


        My husband enjoys oral sex immensely, however he will not reciprocate. what do you think of a situation like that?
          why give it to him then
          Posted by: 4zenuf
          Posted on: 2003-04-24 18:06:06


          Why do you give him oral sex if he doesn't reciprocate? I sure wouldn't. I was really upset about the show today. I couldn't believe that she would say negative things about her husbands body parts and how discusted she is and then in the same sentence say that she has 3 beautiful daugher's. What does she think helped create those beautiful daughter's?
            I AGREE!!
            Posted by: natacha25
            Posted on: 2003-04-24 22:33:17


            I agree!! Where does she think her daughters came from? I think she called it "god's most ugliest creation?!?!? Wow... harsh. If she was to receive that sort of pleasure from her husband, (and maybe she already is.........) wouldn't she think differently? I am certainly a fan fan of both giving and receiving oral pleasure, but I think it's more about understanding each others' needs.
              I too agree!
              Posted by: mrsclaus1
              Posted on: 2003-04-24 23:55:15


              That women should consider herself very lucky that her man doesnt just up and leave or at least find an affair! If I was him my feelings would be so hurt by her comments about, what I consider to be a very beautiful part of his or any other man's body.She is sooo cruel!
              I also hated that she assumed that all of us women dont like to perform oral sex on men. SO NOT TRUE! I know many women like mnyself that love it. She needs to get her facts straight!
              As for the women who doesnt get oral but still gives it? I dont get either so he no longer gets. Fair is fair!
                I LOVE every part of my husbands body
                Posted by: underlat
                Posted on: 2003-04-25 13:52:30


                There is nothing about my husband's body that I don't like.
                Giving my husband oral sex is fun. I love pleasing him, ...it's also a turn on for me.
                  Love is a turn on!
                  Posted by: privetteme
                  Posted on: 2003-04-29 15:25:04


                  Sounds like you have it together! Good for you and your love between you two. Love is special and everything that goes with it.
              Could be him, you know..
              Posted by: hotxmom
              Posted on: 2003-04-30 17:22:17


              Perhaps what she receives isn't pleasurable at all, hence, why bother doing anything your not 'inspired to'? Nothing worse than a guy who doesn't know or is lousy at what he does!! It is possible you know to have three beautiful daughters with a crappy lover!
                marrage changed my wife
                Posted by: stepdad46
                Posted on: 2003-04-30 17:33:03


                Before we were married getting oral sex was not hard and she always seemed to enjoy it kind of like foreplay. After we wed that went away almost overnight.
                She says it is something single people have to do. I have tryed to return the favor but she always pushes me away from doing anything like that on her. I don't miss it anymore and would never resort to having an affare to get that! Getting the car parked in the garage is good enough for me.
                  I think your wife is lucky,
                  Posted by: dryan2003
                  Posted on: 2003-05-01 16:28:05


                  you seem to be very understanding and patient. My husband too, does not get oral sex from me, not much anyway. He does however love giving to me. But he is very happy with getting the car parked in the garage too.
          Turn it around
          Posted by: privetteme
          Posted on: 2003-04-24 20:33:41


          OK Nancy, here is my honest opinion. He is very different from most men as far as oral sex goes. I can't believe he doesn't want to reciprocate as you put it. How about just asking him why?? That would be a lot easier than wondering why. He has got to have a reason. If you are clean and smell good, and you are his wife, well then Think About It! Let's just hope that he is not just being selfish in his love making. Good luck.
          Won't Reciprocate?
          Posted by: topmommy
          Posted on: 2003-04-24 23:25:31


          Won't Reciprocate?
          Posted by: topmommy
          Posted on: 2003-04-24 23:26:33


          I don't care if my husband gives me oral or not. He's not very good at it and I really don't enjoy it that much anyway. How about bringing it to his attention, one good turn deserves another?
          Same here
          Posted by: debcatz
          Posted on: 2003-04-25 10:54:04


          My husband is the same way. He says it smells down there and hasn't wanted to in a year or so. I've stopped doing the same for him, because he would promise some fun later and then not fulfill it.
            It smells down there
            Posted by: cathyinny
            Posted on: 2003-04-25 11:18:42


            Well thats just not nice of your hubby to say. But Im glad you stopped if he doesnt want to pleasure you why should you do him.