07/17 Afraid to Age
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Posted by: steph1107
Posted on: 2003-01-15 10:43:47
Great advice for those with stable lives. I used to not worry about it. I looked forward to growing old with my wonderful husband. Only, see, my wonderful husband DID trade me in on someone 25 years his junior. On top of all the other trauma betrayal and divorce causes, I also now feel old, and used up. I have aged incredibly the last couple of years while going through this and now I am totally obsessed with my face and body. I have just started the "Self Matters" book, and I hope it can help me feel good about myself again.
Posted by: steph1107
Posted on: 2003-01-15 10:43:47
Great advice for those with stable lives. I used to not worry about it. I looked forward to growing old with my wonderful husband. Only, see, my wonderful husband DID trade me in on someone 25 years his junior. On top of all the other trauma betrayal and divorce causes, I also now feel old, and used up. I have aged incredibly the last couple of years while going through this and now I am totally obsessed with my face and body. I have just started the "Self Matters" book, and I hope it can help me feel good about myself again.
To Steph1107...The Key Word Is Obsessed...
Posted by: donnybaby
Posted on: 2003-01-15 11:45:36
I have great compassion for you. But if you really want to change you need to recognize that being obsessed with your face and body is a clear sign of your low self-worth. Which, by the way, began waaaaay before you even met your husband. Make no mistake, being obsessed with oneself doesn't mean you're a bad person. However, as Dr. Phil says many times..."you need to get real!" How do you do that? By learning to love yourself and taking full responsibility for your own life.
Adding to your dilemma IMO, is your belief in the myth "I wanted to grow old with him/her." Although it sounds "nice," it's a false goal that doesn't enable you to live life full out in the present. You need to think about that. In fact wanting to "grow old with him/her" is pure fantasy (fairy tales) and that belief has been disempowering you for a long time. All this you've done to yourself..and all this can be UNDONE to yourself.
I strongly suggest you get a skilled counselor to help you back out of your fantasies and into the wonderful real world. Learn to love yourself and all this fear will leave. You can do it but only if you want. Love & peace, Donny
Posted by: donnybaby
Posted on: 2003-01-15 11:45:36
I have great compassion for you. But if you really want to change you need to recognize that being obsessed with your face and body is a clear sign of your low self-worth. Which, by the way, began waaaaay before you even met your husband. Make no mistake, being obsessed with oneself doesn't mean you're a bad person. However, as Dr. Phil says many times..."you need to get real!" How do you do that? By learning to love yourself and taking full responsibility for your own life.
Adding to your dilemma IMO, is your belief in the myth "I wanted to grow old with him/her." Although it sounds "nice," it's a false goal that doesn't enable you to live life full out in the present. You need to think about that. In fact wanting to "grow old with him/her" is pure fantasy (fairy tales) and that belief has been disempowering you for a long time. All this you've done to yourself..and all this can be UNDONE to yourself.
I strongly suggest you get a skilled counselor to help you back out of your fantasies and into the wonderful real world. Learn to love yourself and all this fear will leave. You can do it but only if you want. Love & peace, Donny
BROKEN
Posted by: carolebohn
Posted on: 2003-01-15 12:27:37
IF YOU HAVE A BROKEN SPIRIT,HELP IS ON IT'S
WAY,JUST LIFT YOUR HANDS TO HEAVEN AND PRAY IN JESUS NAME. JESUS WILL MEET YOU WHERE YOU ARE,HE WILL HEAL YOUR SPIRIT AND YOU WILL REJOICE FOREVERMORE.WHEN YOU FEEL HEAVY BURDEN,FIRST KNEEL AND PRAY.JESUS WILL BE THERE TO TAKE YOUR BURDENS AWAY.WHEN LIFE SEEMS TO OVERTAKE YOU REMEMBER ONE THING HE
GAVE HIS LIFE SO YOU COULD BE FREE.
I CAN SPEAK ON YOUR PAIN,BECAUSE I WAS DUMPED BY A MILITARY MAN AFTER THIRTY THREE YEARS I THOUGHT.NOW LOOKING BACK I THANK GOD THAT THE TRUTH WAS SHOWN TO ME, I WAS NOT DUMPED I WAS BLESSED,MY LIFE IS SO MUCH BETTER AFTER BEING DIVOCED FOR OVER TEN YEARS
I WENT THOUGH IT ALL, A DIVORCE, A CAR ACCIDENT A FIRE AND I LOOK BACK NOW AND SEE
I AM A SURVIOR AND NOT A PERSON WITH LOW SELF
ESTEEM BUT A PERSON THAT IS SO THANKFUL FOR EVERY DAY I LIVE TO ENJOY ALL THE GOODNESS THAT GOD BESTOWS ON ME.I WILL PRAY THAT YOU TO MAY FINE THIS INNER PEACE.REMEMBER YOU ARE SOMEONE LOVED AND GOD DOES NOT MAKE JUNK.
THERE IS A PURPOSE IN LIFE FOR ALL OF US.TRUST AGAIN AND YOU WILL FIND JOY IN THE LITTLE THINGS IN LIFE AS WELL AS EXTRA BLESSINGS.
Posted by: carolebohn
Posted on: 2003-01-15 12:27:37
IF YOU HAVE A BROKEN SPIRIT,HELP IS ON IT'S
WAY,JUST LIFT YOUR HANDS TO HEAVEN AND PRAY IN JESUS NAME. JESUS WILL MEET YOU WHERE YOU ARE,HE WILL HEAL YOUR SPIRIT AND YOU WILL REJOICE FOREVERMORE.WHEN YOU FEEL HEAVY BURDEN,FIRST KNEEL AND PRAY.JESUS WILL BE THERE TO TAKE YOUR BURDENS AWAY.WHEN LIFE SEEMS TO OVERTAKE YOU REMEMBER ONE THING HE
GAVE HIS LIFE SO YOU COULD BE FREE.
I CAN SPEAK ON YOUR PAIN,BECAUSE I WAS DUMPED BY A MILITARY MAN AFTER THIRTY THREE YEARS I THOUGHT.NOW LOOKING BACK I THANK GOD THAT THE TRUTH WAS SHOWN TO ME, I WAS NOT DUMPED I WAS BLESSED,MY LIFE IS SO MUCH BETTER AFTER BEING DIVOCED FOR OVER TEN YEARS
I WENT THOUGH IT ALL, A DIVORCE, A CAR ACCIDENT A FIRE AND I LOOK BACK NOW AND SEE
I AM A SURVIOR AND NOT A PERSON WITH LOW SELF
ESTEEM BUT A PERSON THAT IS SO THANKFUL FOR EVERY DAY I LIVE TO ENJOY ALL THE GOODNESS THAT GOD BESTOWS ON ME.I WILL PRAY THAT YOU TO MAY FINE THIS INNER PEACE.REMEMBER YOU ARE SOMEONE LOVED AND GOD DOES NOT MAKE JUNK.
THERE IS A PURPOSE IN LIFE FOR ALL OF US.TRUST AGAIN AND YOU WILL FIND JOY IN THE LITTLE THINGS IN LIFE AS WELL AS EXTRA BLESSINGS.
AMEN!!!
Posted by: marshapari
Posted on: 2003-01-15 12:39:47
Priorities just seem to fall into place when you have Christ in your life. It's easy to spot a Christian - they beam, they radiate. In the real realm of life - these external focuses(plastic surgery, botox, etc.)are just bandaids. They will never be good enough. But you are good enough as is for God. There is no death with Jesus Christ. So if you want to live forever - develope your spiritual life.
Posted by: marshapari
Posted on: 2003-01-15 12:39:47
Priorities just seem to fall into place when you have Christ in your life. It's easy to spot a Christian - they beam, they radiate. In the real realm of life - these external focuses(plastic surgery, botox, etc.)are just bandaids. They will never be good enough. But you are good enough as is for God. There is no death with Jesus Christ. So if you want to live forever - develope your spiritual life.
To marshapari
Posted by: jayspin
Posted on: 2003-01-15 17:11:37
HI, I just wanted to comment on your message about what is means to have Christ in your life. You are so right about the external looks being just that...something to look at. Ever since Jesus came into my life, I see with different eyes and feel with a different heart. I feel sorry for the people who are so obsessed with their looks that they won't smile. I like to look my best, and I try. But I know that, like you said, there is life after this worldly one. Amen, again!!
Posted by: jayspin
Posted on: 2003-01-15 17:11:37
HI, I just wanted to comment on your message about what is means to have Christ in your life. You are so right about the external looks being just that...something to look at. Ever since Jesus came into my life, I see with different eyes and feel with a different heart. I feel sorry for the people who are so obsessed with their looks that they won't smile. I like to look my best, and I try. But I know that, like you said, there is life after this worldly one. Amen, again!!
religion is not enough
Posted by: heather094
Posted on: 2003-01-17 20:27:32
I know a few people who have turned to Jesus and Christianity and they do not beam or radiate. They still carry their psycological burdens to church every Sunday. They really need an expert like Dr Phil to help them travel down the path to a better life.
Posted by: heather094
Posted on: 2003-01-17 20:27:32
I know a few people who have turned to Jesus and Christianity and they do not beam or radiate. They still carry their psycological burdens to church every Sunday. They really need an expert like Dr Phil to help them travel down the path to a better life.
Thankyou Heather
Posted by: tina_m_s
Posted on: 2003-01-18 11:17:47
i totally agree with you what are we in church today since when did this turn into a religious forum I don't think that the bible has all the good nitty gritty info on practical living as Dr. Phil has reading the bible has never helped me as much as watching shows like oprah and Dr. Phil, it sounds to me like you church ladie are living in some sort of a fantasy world.
Posted by: tina_m_s
Posted on: 2003-01-18 11:17:47
i totally agree with you what are we in church today since when did this turn into a religious forum I don't think that the bible has all the good nitty gritty info on practical living as Dr. Phil has reading the bible has never helped me as much as watching shows like oprah and Dr. Phil, it sounds to me like you church ladie are living in some sort of a fantasy world.
religious
Posted by: carolebohn
Posted on: 2003-01-20 09:56:43
IN REPLY TO YOUR COMMENTS ABOUT US CHURCH
LADIES,REMEMBER WE ARE ON THE MESSAGE BOARD
TO GIVE ENCOURAGEMENT TO SOMEONE WHOM NEEDS A HELPING HAND,AS FOR KNOCKING OTHERS BELEIVES THAT IS NOT WHAT WE WANT TO GET INVOLVED IN,TRUE THERE ARE MANY BROKEN PEOPLE IN CHURCH,THEY ARE ALSO NOT IN CHURCH LOOK AROUND YOU,WE ARE CALLED TO BE A PERSON
WITH COMPASSION,WEATHER IN OR OUT OF CHURCH,THAT IS CALLED CARING FOR OTHERS,GET OUT OF YOURSELF AND YOU WILL FIND A JOY THAT
YOU SEEM TO BE LOOKING FOR.IN MY OWN LIVING
I HAVE FOUND THIS TO BE TRUE.DO YOU SEE THE HOMELESS OUT IN THE STREETS OR ARE YOU ONE OF THOES THAT ONLY SEE YOUR OWN NEEDS?
Posted by: carolebohn
Posted on: 2003-01-20 09:56:43
IN REPLY TO YOUR COMMENTS ABOUT US CHURCH
LADIES,REMEMBER WE ARE ON THE MESSAGE BOARD
TO GIVE ENCOURAGEMENT TO SOMEONE WHOM NEEDS A HELPING HAND,AS FOR KNOCKING OTHERS BELEIVES THAT IS NOT WHAT WE WANT TO GET INVOLVED IN,TRUE THERE ARE MANY BROKEN PEOPLE IN CHURCH,THEY ARE ALSO NOT IN CHURCH LOOK AROUND YOU,WE ARE CALLED TO BE A PERSON
WITH COMPASSION,WEATHER IN OR OUT OF CHURCH,THAT IS CALLED CARING FOR OTHERS,GET OUT OF YOURSELF AND YOU WILL FIND A JOY THAT
YOU SEEM TO BE LOOKING FOR.IN MY OWN LIVING
I HAVE FOUND THIS TO BE TRUE.DO YOU SEE THE HOMELESS OUT IN THE STREETS OR ARE YOU ONE OF THOES THAT ONLY SEE YOUR OWN NEEDS?
Thanks, Carole!!
Posted by: joyanne1
Posted on: 2003-01-15 13:18:33
Thank God for you!! I really needed your encouragement today!
I am a Christian who loves God with all my heart, but is just now learning to love myself for who he made me to be - not a supermodel, but a child of the King. I'm getting ready to start seeing a highly recommended Christian therapist, and am excited about all I'm going to learn.
I focus sooooo much on my looks, and when I was about 28 (I'm now 32) started OBSESSING about looking old. I have a multitude of health problems that are not improving, and they're making me look even older than I am. I feel so alone because nobody in my family believes I'm sick - I even have friends who have dumped me because they think I'm a hypochondriac!! I need to lift my hands to the Lord and EXPECT Him to help me. You've been through so much, and you are a true inspiration and example of the grace of God.
THANKS again for your wonderful post. Have a blessed day! :-)
Posted by: joyanne1
Posted on: 2003-01-15 13:18:33
Thank God for you!! I really needed your encouragement today!
I am a Christian who loves God with all my heart, but is just now learning to love myself for who he made me to be - not a supermodel, but a child of the King. I'm getting ready to start seeing a highly recommended Christian therapist, and am excited about all I'm going to learn.
I focus sooooo much on my looks, and when I was about 28 (I'm now 32) started OBSESSING about looking old. I have a multitude of health problems that are not improving, and they're making me look even older than I am. I feel so alone because nobody in my family believes I'm sick - I even have friends who have dumped me because they think I'm a hypochondriac!! I need to lift my hands to the Lord and EXPECT Him to help me. You've been through so much, and you are a true inspiration and example of the grace of God.
THANKS again for your wonderful post. Have a blessed day! :-)
NANA
Posted by: carolebohn
Posted on: 2003-01-17 12:10:43
I AM SORRY TO HEAR ABOUT YOUR HEALTH PROBLEMS,BUT GLAD TO HEAR YOU ARE TRUSTING TE LORD.AS FOR YOUR FRIENDS THAT HAVE NOT
BEEN THERE FOR YOU,THEY IN MY OPINION ARE NOT
TRUE FRIENDS,FAMILY SOMETIMES JUST DO NOT
KNOW WHAT TO SAY TO SOMEONE THEY LOVE WHEN
THAT PERSON IS IN A PAINFUL TIME.FORGIVE THEM AND PRAY FOR GOD TO GIVE YOU SOME FRIENDS THAT YOU CAN HAVE FUN WITH AND ARE ALSO SUPPORTING TO YOU.IF YOU LIKE YOU CAN
GET MORE COMFORT THOUGTHE POEMS I HAVE WRITTEN.CAROLE BOHN GO POETRY.COM AND THEN
PUT MY NAME IN.MAY GOD SHEALTER YOU UNDER HIS DIVINE POWER AND GIVE YOU BLESSINGS.
Posted by: carolebohn
Posted on: 2003-01-17 12:10:43
I AM SORRY TO HEAR ABOUT YOUR HEALTH PROBLEMS,BUT GLAD TO HEAR YOU ARE TRUSTING TE LORD.AS FOR YOUR FRIENDS THAT HAVE NOT
BEEN THERE FOR YOU,THEY IN MY OPINION ARE NOT
TRUE FRIENDS,FAMILY SOMETIMES JUST DO NOT
KNOW WHAT TO SAY TO SOMEONE THEY LOVE WHEN
THAT PERSON IS IN A PAINFUL TIME.FORGIVE THEM AND PRAY FOR GOD TO GIVE YOU SOME FRIENDS THAT YOU CAN HAVE FUN WITH AND ARE ALSO SUPPORTING TO YOU.IF YOU LIKE YOU CAN
GET MORE COMFORT THOUGTHE POEMS I HAVE WRITTEN.CAROLE BOHN GO POETRY.COM AND THEN
PUT MY NAME IN.MAY GOD SHEALTER YOU UNDER HIS DIVINE POWER AND GIVE YOU BLESSINGS.
Posted by: ginaggarci
Posted on: 2003-07-12 18:47:00
Your preaching and ecouragement is somewhat helpful. However, it is rude to capatilize on forums, in fact it's considered yelling. So please try to stop offending people who don't share the same beliefs with you. But thanks for your efforts, I'm sure they've made a difference to many.
to broken
Posted by: nanna23
Posted on: 2003-01-16 00:06:14
God bless you. I really agree with your comment. I have not been divorced or dumped, but I do know that God does not make junk and you are so right in what you said about that.
Posted by: nanna23
Posted on: 2003-01-16 00:06:14
God bless you. I really agree with your comment. I have not been divorced or dumped, but I do know that God does not make junk and you are so right in what you said about that.
Amen Carole!
Posted by: ellbelle
Posted on: 2003-01-16 04:29:00
Couldn't have said it better myself :) ...except for the divorce part though lol...I did, however, go through the divorce process which resulted in my hubby and I reconciling...we have since been together for 29 years, this March. God def has a plan for each of our lives, if we only seek Him first His plan will be shown to us. Thank you for your wonderful post!
Posted by: ellbelle
Posted on: 2003-01-16 04:29:00
Couldn't have said it better myself :) ...except for the divorce part though lol...I did, however, go through the divorce process which resulted in my hubby and I reconciling...we have since been together for 29 years, this March. God def has a plan for each of our lives, if we only seek Him first His plan will be shown to us. Thank you for your wonderful post!
FYI
Posted by: bjudy45
Posted on: 2003-01-25 10:55:52
a little tip on "netiquette:" typing in all caps is (a) hard to read; (b) seen as "shouting;" and (c) generally seen as poor form.
Posted by: bjudy45
Posted on: 2003-01-25 10:55:52
a little tip on "netiquette:" typing in all caps is (a) hard to read; (b) seen as "shouting;" and (c) generally seen as poor form.
Steph1107, I went through the same thing...
Posted by: dianna33
Posted on: 2003-01-15 14:33:07
And let me tell you -- I never saw it coming. In months I went from a confident professional and a confident parent to someone I no longer recognized. It is devastating (spirit crushing) to be betrayed by the one you've trusted and built your life with and doubly devestating to be traded in for the one thing you can no longer be... 10-20 years younger. For me for several years the pain was unbearable. I was even suicidal in my depression.
Steph, you are not alone. Many women and men go throught this type of rejection. The good news is that you will survive. And although you cannot feel it now, some day you will thrive. In all of this pain reach out for help. I recommend counseling (ASAP), divorce support groups, church and friends. Lean on them all. Also if possible -- move. Give yourself a fresh start away from everyone who knows you as this fool's wife. Don't live that identity one more second. He may have walked away, but he cannot destroy who you are -- only you can do that.
As far as aging, every man is not seeking someone a decade or decade's younger. It baffles me that it's a crime/sin/disgrace when a 25 year old chases after a 15 year old; but a 50 year old man, in our culture, holds his head up when sleeping with a girl younger than his daugher. Yuck! It's like an extended form of pedophelia (sp?). I saw a picture of Michael Douglas and Katherine Zeta Jones and I'm 39, not nearly as beautiful as Katherine, and looking at Michael Douglas, I tho
Posted by: dianna33
Posted on: 2003-01-15 14:33:07
And let me tell you -- I never saw it coming. In months I went from a confident professional and a confident parent to someone I no longer recognized. It is devastating (spirit crushing) to be betrayed by the one you've trusted and built your life with and doubly devestating to be traded in for the one thing you can no longer be... 10-20 years younger. For me for several years the pain was unbearable. I was even suicidal in my depression.
Steph, you are not alone. Many women and men go throught this type of rejection. The good news is that you will survive. And although you cannot feel it now, some day you will thrive. In all of this pain reach out for help. I recommend counseling (ASAP), divorce support groups, church and friends. Lean on them all. Also if possible -- move. Give yourself a fresh start away from everyone who knows you as this fool's wife. Don't live that identity one more second. He may have walked away, but he cannot destroy who you are -- only you can do that.
As far as aging, every man is not seeking someone a decade or decade's younger. It baffles me that it's a crime/sin/disgrace when a 25 year old chases after a 15 year old; but a 50 year old man, in our culture, holds his head up when sleeping with a girl younger than his daugher. Yuck! It's like an extended form of pedophelia (sp?). I saw a picture of Michael Douglas and Katherine Zeta Jones and I'm 39, not nearly as beautiful as Katherine, and looking at Michael Douglas, I tho
To Steph1107... cont...
Posted by: dianna33
Posted on: 2003-01-15 14:58:45
(Lost half of my post) As I was saying. Looking at Micheal Douglas and Katherine Zeta Jones, I thought I'm 39 and there's no way I could be with him. I mean he's handsome, but so is my grandfather!
Sweetie, take care of yourself and do whatever you need to do to feel better. Start with healing emotionally (get help) and then if you'd like to improve on your physical appearance go ahead! Treat yourself! Don't feel old -- own your age and walk around proud! Remember that your ex husband walking around with someone half his age only makes him look like an old fool. And don't give up. There are many many men who don't want a child to date. Don't resign yourself to being alone... meet people, volunteer, get involved... push yourself to live. Remember there are many good men in this world. Don't forget who you are! Claim your life! Claim your joy! It may always hurt, but you will be happy again.
If you need a friend, please email at any time. Remember you are not alone, you are beautiful, you have the rest of your life to celebrate or to grieve... He's taken enough from you... don't give him your future.
I'll be praying for you and your spirit to heal. Isn't it wierd to look at someone you thought you knew so well and not recognize them? It shakes your believe in everyone and everything... hold my hand for as long as necessary. We women... let's stick together.
I realize I've been rambling here. Should mention I learned to be secure alone and the
Posted by: dianna33
Posted on: 2003-01-15 14:58:45
(Lost half of my post) As I was saying. Looking at Micheal Douglas and Katherine Zeta Jones, I thought I'm 39 and there's no way I could be with him. I mean he's handsome, but so is my grandfather!
Sweetie, take care of yourself and do whatever you need to do to feel better. Start with healing emotionally (get help) and then if you'd like to improve on your physical appearance go ahead! Treat yourself! Don't feel old -- own your age and walk around proud! Remember that your ex husband walking around with someone half his age only makes him look like an old fool. And don't give up. There are many many men who don't want a child to date. Don't resign yourself to being alone... meet people, volunteer, get involved... push yourself to live. Remember there are many good men in this world. Don't forget who you are! Claim your life! Claim your joy! It may always hurt, but you will be happy again.
If you need a friend, please email at any time. Remember you are not alone, you are beautiful, you have the rest of your life to celebrate or to grieve... He's taken enough from you... don't give him your future.
I'll be praying for you and your spirit to heal. Isn't it wierd to look at someone you thought you knew so well and not recognize them? It shakes your believe in everyone and everything... hold my hand for as long as necessary. We women... let's stick together.
I realize I've been rambling here. Should mention I learned to be secure alone and the
more...
Posted by: dianna33
Posted on: 2003-01-15 15:05:06
and then met the most amazing man. He loves me for me. (again, there are many good men not seeking young girls and they're as upset as us women with what the media tries to feed us pertaining to beauty) I've decided to give up on societies definition of beauty. Ten thousand wrinkles cannot hide the beauty of a strong, giving spirit and a loving soul - a well lived life! Bring it on!
Posted by: dianna33
Posted on: 2003-01-15 15:05:06
and then met the most amazing man. He loves me for me. (again, there are many good men not seeking young girls and they're as upset as us women with what the media tries to feed us pertaining to beauty) I've decided to give up on societies definition of beauty. Ten thousand wrinkles cannot hide the beauty of a strong, giving spirit and a loving soul - a well lived life! Bring it on!
To dianna33
Posted by: kittin
Posted on: 2003-01-15 23:29:52
What a pleasure to read your positive message! You are wise and not bitter. A rare combination! Looking forward to more. Thank-You for the hope.
Posted by: kittin
Posted on: 2003-01-15 23:29:52
What a pleasure to read your positive message! You are wise and not bitter. A rare combination! Looking forward to more. Thank-You for the hope.
Thanks Dianna
Posted by: steph1107
Posted on: 2003-01-16 09:13:44
I never saw it coming either (but in retrospect, should have). Thank you for your kind words. Those who have never been through this are often unsympathetic and even cruel (secretly, I think they fear it could happen to them). I have been suicidal, but each day I wake up better than the day before. Unfortunately, my company collapsed and I had a breast cancer scare all within 2 months of the final showdown---....so it has been tough and I haven't found suitable employment since (this has been about 10 months now). I do have one passion left in life, and am going to move to pursue it and hopefully find joy in not only that but just some peace, and maybe a job that if it won't get me back to the upper management level I was at, at least it is a new start.
Once again, thank you for your kindness and understanding. Intellectually, I knew I wasn't the lone ranger with this situation, but it was nice to hear from someone else. You also give me hope that I won't come out bitter (I am not, but way, way cautious), and will be whole again before my life ends.
Posted by: steph1107
Posted on: 2003-01-16 09:13:44
I never saw it coming either (but in retrospect, should have). Thank you for your kind words. Those who have never been through this are often unsympathetic and even cruel (secretly, I think they fear it could happen to them). I have been suicidal, but each day I wake up better than the day before. Unfortunately, my company collapsed and I had a breast cancer scare all within 2 months of the final showdown---....so it has been tough and I haven't found suitable employment since (this has been about 10 months now). I do have one passion left in life, and am going to move to pursue it and hopefully find joy in not only that but just some peace, and maybe a job that if it won't get me back to the upper management level I was at, at least it is a new start.
Once again, thank you for your kindness and understanding. Intellectually, I knew I wasn't the lone ranger with this situation, but it was nice to hear from someone else. You also give me hope that I won't come out bitter (I am not, but way, way cautious), and will be whole again before my life ends.
Dear Traded
Posted by: dvhenson
Posted on: 2003-01-15 22:15:31
1st.< That younger model is going to get old and ugly too one day and some jerk may trade her in. 2'nd< You've been on the pity pot way too long, now it's time to pick yourself up, dust yourself off and start heading to the beauty salon. A good cut and change of hair color works wonders for our egos and a change like this is a good thing. 3'rd< Don't dwell on what you lost, but what "HE" lost. 4'th< Take time to re-discover YOU! You don't have to be in the Army to "BE" all you "can" be. Take Care of and Be Happy with yourself.
Posted by: dvhenson
Posted on: 2003-01-15 22:15:31
1st.< That younger model is going to get old and ugly too one day and some jerk may trade her in. 2'nd< You've been on the pity pot way too long, now it's time to pick yourself up, dust yourself off and start heading to the beauty salon. A good cut and change of hair color works wonders for our egos and a change like this is a good thing. 3'rd< Don't dwell on what you lost, but what "HE" lost. 4'th< Take time to re-discover YOU! You don't have to be in the Army to "BE" all you "can" be. Take Care of and Be Happy with yourself.
