07/19 Extreme Marriages
1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | next » | lastDr. Phil said it, all except the 'D' word
Posted by: gasmom
Posted on: 2004-05-07 09:08:02
I'm not going to be able to see the show today. I'm glad the show's notes are posted already. Dr. Phil stated his opinion beautifully. I only wish I had that knowledge and could have heard those words 3 years into my marriage. My husband waited 22 years before deciding to return to his gay side. Of course, being gay in the late 70's wasn't as acceptable as it is now, it was just easier to get married to a woman, have your expected family and move on. I hope Raquel and Brandon preserve their friendship as it is now, end the marriage, because it is over as they know and expected it to be. Trust me, it's much easier at 3 years than at 22 and when you have a baby rather than teenagers. Be friends who can love and respect eachother and raise your child together. And Raquel, please, please, please know the end of your marriage has nothing to do with you personally. He was gay before he met you. It took me a few months to figure out that I didn't do anything to make my now ex-husband gay. As Dr. Phil said, "You are wired that way." You and Brandon had a couple of tires off the road right from the start of your journey. Best of luck to you both.
Posted by: gasmom
Posted on: 2004-05-07 09:08:02
I'm not going to be able to see the show today. I'm glad the show's notes are posted already. Dr. Phil stated his opinion beautifully. I only wish I had that knowledge and could have heard those words 3 years into my marriage. My husband waited 22 years before deciding to return to his gay side. Of course, being gay in the late 70's wasn't as acceptable as it is now, it was just easier to get married to a woman, have your expected family and move on. I hope Raquel and Brandon preserve their friendship as it is now, end the marriage, because it is over as they know and expected it to be. Trust me, it's much easier at 3 years than at 22 and when you have a baby rather than teenagers. Be friends who can love and respect eachother and raise your child together. And Raquel, please, please, please know the end of your marriage has nothing to do with you personally. He was gay before he met you. It took me a few months to figure out that I didn't do anything to make my now ex-husband gay. As Dr. Phil said, "You are wired that way." You and Brandon had a couple of tires off the road right from the start of your journey. Best of luck to you both.
end the marriage
Posted by: mrswife
Posted on: 2004-05-07 17:13:03
I agree that this couple should not stay married. A wife shouldn't share her husband with multiple male lovers !
Posted by: mrswife
Posted on: 2004-05-07 17:13:03
I agree that this couple should not stay married. A wife shouldn't share her husband with multiple male lovers !
What about Fidelity?
Posted by: landen99
Posted on: 2004-05-07 23:32:47
You're right, a wife should not share her husband with multiple male lovers. The husband shouldn't have those lovers whether or not he is gay! Marriage requires fidelity and commitment period.
Posted by: landen99
Posted on: 2004-05-07 23:32:47
You're right, a wife should not share her husband with multiple male lovers. The husband shouldn't have those lovers whether or not he is gay! Marriage requires fidelity and commitment period.
marriage
Posted by: strikertwo
Posted on: 2004-05-09 01:22:16
Would she stay with him if he had four affairs with women? Get real. There is no difference between cheating with a man or with a woman.
Posted by: strikertwo
Posted on: 2004-05-09 01:22:16
Would she stay with him if he had four affairs with women? Get real. There is no difference between cheating with a man or with a woman.
Selfish!
Posted by: vickiebt
Posted on: 2004-05-09 07:27:58
I am in the process of divorcing a man who claims to be gay. It is a very difficult process. My ex like Brandon is extremely SELFISH! There is no other way to describe it. I was with my ex in the marriage for 12 years. We have 3 beautiful children. Since leaving I have found out that he was having sex with men for at least 10 of the 12 years we were together. Get this, he claims to have not "cheated" on me because he only had sex with men, not women! Raquel get out now. My experience tells me that gay people are only concerned with themselves, Selfish, Selfish, Selfish! Do you think once my ex considered the awful diseases he exposed me to? Did he even care? It still continues that the only thing that matters to him is that his needs are taken care of. I live in Utah and saw Brandon on the local news station after the show on Friday. How can he say he is so happy with how things are? He made a commitment to you and should never have gone outside of that commitment. Being gay is a choice and for every choice there is a consequence. The choice that he made to marry you, conceive a child and then act out and commit adultry will have an eternal impact. It affects you, your family, your child and all of the generations to come. There is no excuse for what he has done to you. He is selfish. Move on Raquel, you deserve better. How can he say he loves you? He obviously loves himself more because hurting you was more important than staying committed to what he had promised. Good luck. I wish you the best.
Posted by: vickiebt
Posted on: 2004-05-09 07:27:58
I am in the process of divorcing a man who claims to be gay. It is a very difficult process. My ex like Brandon is extremely SELFISH! There is no other way to describe it. I was with my ex in the marriage for 12 years. We have 3 beautiful children. Since leaving I have found out that he was having sex with men for at least 10 of the 12 years we were together. Get this, he claims to have not "cheated" on me because he only had sex with men, not women! Raquel get out now. My experience tells me that gay people are only concerned with themselves, Selfish, Selfish, Selfish! Do you think once my ex considered the awful diseases he exposed me to? Did he even care? It still continues that the only thing that matters to him is that his needs are taken care of. I live in Utah and saw Brandon on the local news station after the show on Friday. How can he say he is so happy with how things are? He made a commitment to you and should never have gone outside of that commitment. Being gay is a choice and for every choice there is a consequence. The choice that he made to marry you, conceive a child and then act out and commit adultry will have an eternal impact. It affects you, your family, your child and all of the generations to come. There is no excuse for what he has done to you. He is selfish. Move on Raquel, you deserve better. How can he say he loves you? He obviously loves himself more because hurting you was more important than staying committed to what he had promised. Good luck. I wish you the best.
Good Advice
Posted by: bgutho
Posted on: 2004-05-11 08:08:02
I believe you gave good advice to Raquel. Maybe it's because you've walked in her shoes. I truly hope in spite of her love for Brandon she's considering the consequences for herself and their child. What a shame that he won't get help with his selfisheness and homosexuality to save his marriage and be with the wife he says he loves so much. I appreciated your advice more than Dr. Phil's. This is one time I didn't feel he gave good advice or was lacking in it. God bless you!
Posted by: bgutho
Posted on: 2004-05-11 08:08:02
I believe you gave good advice to Raquel. Maybe it's because you've walked in her shoes. I truly hope in spite of her love for Brandon she's considering the consequences for herself and their child. What a shame that he won't get help with his selfisheness and homosexuality to save his marriage and be with the wife he says he loves so much. I appreciated your advice more than Dr. Phil's. This is one time I didn't feel he gave good advice or was lacking in it. God bless you!
Not so good advice
Posted by: jenmopo
Posted on: 2004-08-13 21:57:40
What kind of "help" should he get for his homosexuality? I think that he is torn between the love he has for Raquel and the fact that he is gay. The marriage needs to end, but I hope that they can remain friends. I think that Dr. Phil was right on with his comments and he clearly has the eduacation and experience to back it up.
Posted by: jenmopo
Posted on: 2004-08-13 21:57:40
What kind of "help" should he get for his homosexuality? I think that he is torn between the love he has for Raquel and the fact that he is gay. The marriage needs to end, but I hope that they can remain friends. I think that Dr. Phil was right on with his comments and he clearly has the eduacation and experience to back it up.
rubbish
Posted by: juiceyj
Posted on: 2004-05-11 08:08:45
vickibet im sorry to hear that youve been treated in such a way,but i take offence to what you have said about gay people being selfish,your husband was selfish but to judge a people by one man is wrong,if a black child stold from you or even child for that matter does it mean that all children are thiefs,no i didnt think so.........
hope you have a happy and easy life raising your 3 children
justinx
Posted by: juiceyj
Posted on: 2004-05-11 08:08:45
vickibet im sorry to hear that youve been treated in such a way,but i take offence to what you have said about gay people being selfish,your husband was selfish but to judge a people by one man is wrong,if a black child stold from you or even child for that matter does it mean that all children are thiefs,no i didnt think so.........
hope you have a happy and easy life raising your 3 children
justinx
See you are selfish
Posted by: steph812
Posted on: 2004-07-17 17:21:05
You are selfish for telling her to have a happy life raising her 3 children that he helped create in what she thought was love. She has been cheated. Many women marry for love why can't men and if they know they are "gay" then don't get married Duh!
Posted by: steph812
Posted on: 2004-07-17 17:21:05
You are selfish for telling her to have a happy life raising her 3 children that he helped create in what she thought was love. She has been cheated. Many women marry for love why can't men and if they know they are "gay" then don't get married Duh!
You're Naive
Posted by: cancerstic
Posted on: 2004-07-19 07:59:24
You are abusing the image of Chirst to push your opinions, if you don't think no one's catching onto that one, you're really naive. Stop using Christ that way, this isn't his Word it's yours.
Posted by: cancerstic
Posted on: 2004-07-19 07:59:24
You are abusing the image of Chirst to push your opinions, if you don't think no one's catching onto that one, you're really naive. Stop using Christ that way, this isn't his Word it's yours.
Reply to What God says
Posted by: steph812
Posted on: 2004-07-19 08:41:29
You must not read his word. He says it is an abomination to use the body in what is unnatural man with man leaving the natural use of a woman and woman with woman. Never mind people are going to feel what they feel there is no since in me saying anymore and there is no since in arguing with you. I just pray for people to open their eyes and the only way to do that is to read the Word. Sorry I won't respond or write again.
Posted by: steph812
Posted on: 2004-07-19 08:41:29
You must not read his word. He says it is an abomination to use the body in what is unnatural man with man leaving the natural use of a woman and woman with woman. Never mind people are going to feel what they feel there is no since in me saying anymore and there is no since in arguing with you. I just pray for people to open their eyes and the only way to do that is to read the Word. Sorry I won't respond or write again.
You go Girl!!
Posted by: ms_sheshe
Posted on: 2004-07-19 15:02:36
I totally agree with you Steph812, and the TRUTH do not need any support!!
A-men that we have people standing firm in their faith.
Posted by: ms_sheshe
Posted on: 2004-07-19 15:02:36
I totally agree with you Steph812, and the TRUTH do not need any support!!
A-men that we have people standing firm in their faith.
Do not judge or you too will be judged
Posted by: em_couch
Posted on: 2004-07-19 16:02:57
Firstly, let's not take the sacred Word of God out of context. Where does it say we should judge others and point fingers? Everyone has struggles and conflicts, but God gives us the grace and support through family and friends to confront those struggles and live a life that is fulfilling. Each person must decide for themselves what is right and what is wrong, it's called free choice and it is a gift from God. Though it doesn't mean that you will automatically make the right choice, there are consequences. What bothers me most about this entire issue is that people aren't being honest before they get married, they just plunge into a relationship and hope for the best. It isn't as much selfish as it is irresponsible and to have children involved makes it inexcusable. You have a choice, but what about them?
Posted by: em_couch
Posted on: 2004-07-19 16:02:57
Firstly, let's not take the sacred Word of God out of context. Where does it say we should judge others and point fingers? Everyone has struggles and conflicts, but God gives us the grace and support through family and friends to confront those struggles and live a life that is fulfilling. Each person must decide for themselves what is right and what is wrong, it's called free choice and it is a gift from God. Though it doesn't mean that you will automatically make the right choice, there are consequences. What bothers me most about this entire issue is that people aren't being honest before they get married, they just plunge into a relationship and hope for the best. It isn't as much selfish as it is irresponsible and to have children involved makes it inexcusable. You have a choice, but what about them?
Posted by: kimyburns
Posted on: 2004-07-19 16:41:01
You are right not to argue, but don't say that you won't write or respond anymore. People need to say what is right and I feel that you did just that and no you did not misrepresent Christ. Those who feel that not calling wrong exactly what it is... WRONG-- and still claim to know Christ-- they are the wrong ones. I look forward to more of your post.
Thats true
Posted by: practicals
Posted on: 2004-07-19 17:31:11
I agree with you. I pity dr.p and his misguided sincerety.
I believe he believes in what he is doing. Although I don't think he totally believes that grandpa fellow who changed into grandma isn't skirting other masculine issues by ignoring his masculinity.
Too bad we won't ever know the true nature and future of that relationship. That wouldn't ever see daylight by viacom.
Posted by: practicals
Posted on: 2004-07-19 17:31:11
I agree with you. I pity dr.p and his misguided sincerety.
I believe he believes in what he is doing. Although I don't think he totally believes that grandpa fellow who changed into grandma isn't skirting other masculine issues by ignoring his masculinity.
Too bad we won't ever know the true nature and future of that relationship. That wouldn't ever see daylight by viacom.
What his word also says...
Posted by: bunny0728
Posted on: 2004-07-19 17:31:19
Are we forgetting that his word also says, Judge not less ye be judged, or ye who is without sin shall cast the first stone? Just curious
Posted by: bunny0728
Posted on: 2004-07-19 17:31:19
Are we forgetting that his word also says, Judge not less ye be judged, or ye who is without sin shall cast the first stone? Just curious
It is selfishness
Posted by: mommybma
Posted on: 2004-07-21 15:18:01
I have a gay brother and the very essence of who he is...is selfishness. I have met a few gay people who were not selfish, but not many at all actually. Everything in the world is somehow about them or against them. They want for their sexual preference to be regarded in the same way as a nationality, they want special privileges because of their sexual preferences, they cry about all the wrong things done to them because of their sexual preference and never concider what forcing their issues on everyone else does to those people, and nor do they care. What else can that be called but selfishness.
And another thing... it says in the bible that man should not lie down with man. There is nothing that can be interpreted from that other than exactly what that says.
Posted by: mommybma
Posted on: 2004-07-21 15:18:01
I have a gay brother and the very essence of who he is...is selfishness. I have met a few gay people who were not selfish, but not many at all actually. Everything in the world is somehow about them or against them. They want for their sexual preference to be regarded in the same way as a nationality, they want special privileges because of their sexual preferences, they cry about all the wrong things done to them because of their sexual preference and never concider what forcing their issues on everyone else does to those people, and nor do they care. What else can that be called but selfishness.
And another thing... it says in the bible that man should not lie down with man. There is nothing that can be interpreted from that other than exactly what that says.
Huh?
Posted by: jameylynne
Posted on: 2004-07-21 19:56:27
Exodus 35:2. clearly states that my neighbor who works on the Sabbath should be put to death. Am I morally obligated to kill him myself, or should I ask the police to do it?
Posted by: jameylynne
Posted on: 2004-07-21 19:56:27
Exodus 35:2. clearly states that my neighbor who works on the Sabbath should be put to death. Am I morally obligated to kill him myself, or should I ask the police to do it?
wow
Posted by: jmiles1967
Posted on: 2004-05-20 17:43:36
I agree with you. I have seen Dr. Phil condone behavior that is selfish and desrtuctive to everyone around them. I have a hard time beliving that a person is wired as he says to be a certan way. I am a black man and I find the idea that being gay is something you are born TO DO. Being black is something I am, not something I do I would ask dr. phil to be honest with gay people as he would any guy why cheated on his wife.
Posted by: jmiles1967
Posted on: 2004-05-20 17:43:36
I agree with you. I have seen Dr. Phil condone behavior that is selfish and desrtuctive to everyone around them. I have a hard time beliving that a person is wired as he says to be a certan way. I am a black man and I find the idea that being gay is something you are born TO DO. Being black is something I am, not something I do I would ask dr. phil to be honest with gay people as he would any guy why cheated on his wife.
right ...I hate how I was treated
Posted by: candy1951
Posted on: 2004-07-17 14:08:27
I had exactly the same thing happen to me...
28 years of mariage...32 years of my life wiht a cheater and liar and never knew till I was too old to do anything. Emotionally abusive as hell...blamed me for not being desirable...made fun of my looks and I took that crap...because I thought it was wrong to divorce...I wish I had been smarter and got out after the first week....DUUUUUUUUUUUHHHHHHHHHHhhhh me !!!!!
After divorcing this year, found out life is great and he is a jerk totally. But how I wasted my life and that I truly regret.
klady
Posted by: candy1951
Posted on: 2004-07-17 14:08:27
I had exactly the same thing happen to me...
28 years of mariage...32 years of my life wiht a cheater and liar and never knew till I was too old to do anything. Emotionally abusive as hell...blamed me for not being desirable...made fun of my looks and I took that crap...because I thought it was wrong to divorce...I wish I had been smarter and got out after the first week....DUUUUUUUUUUUHHHHHHHHHHhhhh me !!!!!
After divorcing this year, found out life is great and he is a jerk totally. But how I wasted my life and that I truly regret.
klady
